Super Bowl XVI

What did we say last week? "Eric will have to rely on some witchcraft for that once in a decade upset…” Well, it happened, and it looks like our fourth three-time champion will be Fat Jubas! We gave the Tiiite End Jammers the edge at nearly every position but come game time, everyone not named Andrew Luck, LeVeon Bell, and Antonio Brown came up short for Jammers. In fact, while Sunday and Monday represented hope for Lei, this matchup was almost over by Sunday as Fat Jubas jumped out to a huge lead on Saturday night.

Playoff MVP David Johnson had another 100+ combined yards game, and threw up 31.6 points. The quarterback juggling that ended up starting Jameis Winston was a great move by Eric. And that big game Jubas needed from slumping receiver Mike Evans? Got it! Having another receiver step up to help him? Hello Alshon Jeffery's 11.7 points! And with LeGarrette Blount pounding his way to 17 pts himself, Jubas were looking great early on.

The Jammers did make a game of it though. Any time you have Bell and Brown yet to play, any lead can be overcome. And the two Steelers did combine for 47.8 points to close the gap, but a dud by Demaryius Thomas and negative five points from Titans defense really hurt. In the end, the golden trio of Luck, Bell and Brown -- plus Matt Bryant’s 17 pts -- weren’t enough to complete a comeback win for Jammers.

• Fat Jubas (9-4) def Tiiite End Jammers (10-3), 119.9 - 103.9

How did Jubas get here? Well, to be honest, they’ve always been here. Like we said last week, this was their third back-to-back title showing, and they already had two rings (2005, 2012) in their trophy room. Jubas missed the playoffs just once in recent years (starting off 1-8 in 2014), and the last decade has seen them go as far as the division finals seven out of ten times, plus four straight division titles from 2010-2013 (and an additional one this year), and four Super Bowl appearances. Are they the best team from Spunky Misunderstood Geniuses division? That’s a definite “yes.” Are they one of the best franchises in CTDB history? Again, that answer must now be answered in the affirmative.

In the 2012 title game, the hero for Jubas was Cam Newton, who subsequently became a keeper for the next two seasons. And then, starting in 2015, GM Eric decided to ditch keep-ing a quarterback and opted to stream options. Meanwhile, his entire roster has changed from then, as Chris Johnson, Darren McFadden, Vincent Jackson, and Jimmy Graham gave way to the current crop of Jubas’ champs.

The biggest pickup of all was sophomore running back David Johnson -- undrafted as a rookie -- who has emerged as the greatest fantasy weapon of all. And while there’s been ups and downs for the likes of CJ Anderson, Alshon Jeffery, and Emmanuel Sanders over the last few years, each has served their time with Jubas, with Jeffery and Sanders completing their third season before finally getting a long awaited ring.

This year, Jubas started off 5-0 before suffering a 2-4 midseason swoon, but they picked it back up for a 4-1 record to clean up the division title and earned a crucial bye. Then we had the 0.4 point win over Battle Angel to get into the Super Bowl. And then, amidst all the doubters, Jubas came through and finished the job, and got their much deserved third title! Congrats to Eric on his third ring!

As for the Jammers, this Super Bowl collapse was a disappointment but a second finals showing in three years definitely signals that the franchise is back as an every season contender. After going to our first three Toilet Bowls (2010-12), the Jammers have worked themselves up over the past few seasons, culminating in one of the most dominant seasons ever, in 2014. Coming up just short this year is still a win for a team that dropped out of the playoffs last year.

Overall, all this success signals a return to glory for Jammers, and their fantastic keeper core will keep them in title contention for years to come. GM Lei has shown a deft touch on the waiver wire, and this season unearthed Jordan Howard, Tyreek Hill, and Taylor Gabriel, among others. With Luck, Bell, Brown, plus DeMarco Murray and Demaryius Thomas on-board, this is still the most talented team in CTDB and Jammers won’t likely fall prey to the championship curse they suffered last season.

Super Preview 2016

My goodness, in what has to be the closest divisional finals ever, Fat Jubas narrowly edged out Battle Angel by 0.4 points, 84.7 - 84.3! Once upon a time we had a tie in the Super Bowl, but that was before decimal scoring came into our league, and for hyperbole’s sake let’s just say that this was the narrowest CTDB playoff victory ever! With Jammers dismissing Chunky Monkeys by a comfortable margin, the Super Bowl matchup is set, as our two #1 seeds prepare to face off for a shot at their third titles each! Let’s take a look at the matchups…

QB: Here’s to sudden waiver wire starts! Bills QB Tyrod Taylor was inserted into the lineup after being picked up off of the waiver wire right before the big game — Taylor was on this team earlier this month too, but was dumped in favor of Matthew Stafford. And that decision basically won Fat Jubas the game -- Stafford put up only 13 points, free agent two day pickup Winston had 17 (he was cut for Taylor), and Taylor threw down 19.6, a crucial difference in the tight game versus Battle Angel. Great GM move Eric, and now he'll return to the Super Bowl again.

And now Taylor is gone again, with Jameis Winston returning to the roster for the championship game. Again, this just shows how shuffling quarterbacks is a viable option in our league — Jubas has used five quarterbacks this year. Winston will face off against Lei's Andrew Luck, who has been steadily putting up 25+ points each game. EDGE: Jammers

RB: You can’t find a better backfield than LeVeon Bell and DeMarco Murray, and that combo led Jammers to their last title. But David Johnson and LeGarrette Blount aren’t slouches either. And even if Bell goes supernova, so too could Johnson, as they are neck-and-neck the best running backs in football. Both are facing off against tough defenses, so no edge there. But secondary back Murray seems to have more upside than touchdown king Blount, and so we’re going to just wait and see which pairing can combine for a bigger weekend. (I want to mention that Jordan Howard, one of the semi-breakout backs of this year, can’t even get on the field for Lei’s squad…) EDGE: Jammers

WR/TE: Aside from having a drool worthy backfield, Jammers also have Antonio Brown, the best receiver in the game. My goodness! For this Super Bowl Xmas matchup, it’ll be Brown, Demaryius Thomas, and whoever becomes the third receiver here. Last week it was Jordan Matthews, but we have a suspicion Kenny Britt, Tyreek Hill, Taylor Gabriel, or even Jeremy Maclin might get the call for their big play ability.

Unfortunately, Jubas is coming into this matchup with their number one receiver, Mike Evans, in quite a slump. The good news is Tampa Bay will play New Orleans this week, so a return to big numbers could happen for Evans. It needs to happen actually, for Jubas to have a chance. And maybe Eric could slide Alshon Jeffery into the hero slot, as Jeffery is back on the field and had a great last week. Otherwise Eric'll be juggling between Emmanuel Sanders, Tyrell Williams, and JJ Nelson for starting receivers. None look like difference changers. EDGE: Jammers

DEF/K: Matt Bryant and Matt Prater are both top kickers, working for high scoring offenses. Bryant has been the #1 kicker for most of the year, giving Jammers yet another top position option, but there’s really no big difference between Bryant and Prater. And both defenses are pretty fantasy boring. Chargers and Titans, for Jubas and Jammers respectively, are both okay but neither will top more than five or six points this weekend. EDGE: None

Prediction: There’s no way not to predict a Jammers win, as they’ve been the highest scoring team all year long (117.2 to 109.3 for Jubas), the most consistent team week-by-week, and also seem to be playing their best ball at just the right time. Fat Jubas did beat Jammers in their lone matchup this year, but that was in WK2, pre-Bell. For Jubas to win this time out, Eric will have to rely on some witchcraft for that once in a decade upset. Fun fact: Jubas has made three back-to-back Super Bowl appearances (2005-6, 2011-12, 2015-6), and each time it's been a win and a loss, so that portends well for their matchup this weekend. Still, we are going with Jammers by twelve points...

Toilet Bowl VII

#2 Dirty Birds (5-8) def #4 Fobsters (3-10), 103.4 - 75.5
That's two Toilet Bowl wins in three years for Dirty Birds -- with a championship in-between. It can be argued that Jon has been the winningest owner in CTDB ever! Ha, just kidding. It's been a tough year for Dirty Birds, as they crashed hard out of the playoffs, but this win redeems their season. And hey, even Adrian Peterson returned to the field this past weekend!

Led by 30.4 points by LeSean McCoy and 26.2 points from Matt Ryan, the Birds cruised through the two Toilet Bowl rounds with aplomb and will now seek to fill out their roster with yet another #1 overall pick -- even though 2014's Todd Gurley has really lost his shine. Could a return to title contention be around the corner?

As for Fobsters, this is their second Toilet Bowl finals in as many years, and it has to count as a victory as they were the worst team in the league this past season. An upset win over Gang Green in RD1 gave them a top two pick, and they'll have a very high pick in a loaded draft to help get them out of the cellar next season. With both Eddie Lacy and Melvin Gordon out by the end of the year, well see if GM Jimmy will select a new franchise back, or add to their receiving depth of Dez Bryant, Jordy Nelson, and promising rookie Corey Coleman.

2016 RD2 Matchups

Tiiite End Jammers (10-3) vs Chunky Monkeys (7-6)
The Malcolm Mitchell versus Julian Edelman matchup on MNF determined the fate of Inscrutable Drama Kings’ first round, and in the end, Monkeys snuck out with a close victory behind Kirk Cousins, DeSean Jackson, and Mitchell’s MNF heroics. However, having only topped 100+ in one of the last five weeks, Evan’s team seems ill equipped to fend off Jammers, who haven’t gone under the century mark since WK7, and threw up 144.7 (non-counting) points during the bye. Should Monkeys just concede now?

Fat Jubas (9-4) vs Battle Angel (7-6)
With both teams floundering in round one, Battle Angel used a 21.7 point outburst from Jeremy Hill to edge out Ping’s team, who didn’t have anyone except Caleb Sturgis, the kicker, go over double digits. Now Vu gets to face the Spunky Misunderstood Geniuses division winner, a team that averaged 109.3 ppg (to just 98.1 from Angel) this season. Battle Angel’s hopes ride on anther quiet week from Jubas' David Johnson and Mike Evans, while simultaneously hoping Drew Brees and TY Hilton are enough to fend off Matthew Stafford and Emmanuel Sanders, plus LeGarrette Blount versus Jeremy Hill. Actually, this could be quite the matchup! Can Fat Jubas make their fourth Super Bowl in six years? Or will Battle Angel make a return appearance to the big game (their last one was in 2013)?

Toilet Bowl
#2 Dirty Birds (5-8) vs #4 Fobsters (3-10)
Nothing exciting here, as Fobsters neatly dispatched top seed Athena Nike behind a huge Tom Brady game and also a Carlos Hyde and Jordy Nelson cherry on top. The Dirty Birds had home field advantage and used every inch of it to crush Gang Green 116.8 - 63.9. Last year’s champs could win a Toilet Bowl again (they won in 2014), or Fobsters could get over the hump after losing out to Buffy in the fight for the #1 overall pick last season -- they won in 2013. Either way, both of these teams have had Toilet Bowl success, and another Chinese school rivalry lives on!

Playoff Matchups 2016

Not much changed since WK6, as the playoff matchups we expected then shook out basically exactly the same! What a weird year for fantasy, and it's safe to say that there are some pretty hobbled teams fighting it out in RD1...

PLAYOFFS
LA Buffy (8-5) vs Chunky Monkeys (7-6)
Despite scoring only 97.8 ppg — the lowest in IDK division — Buffy faced the league’s softest schedule and took advantage to start 6-2 before stumbling a bit down the stretch. The good news is that they’re 2-0 this season in H2H matchups versus Monkeys, and even the loss of Rob Gronkowski won’t hurt too much, as he’s been MIA most of this season anyway. Losing AJ Green though, that’ll hurt a lot, and Cam Newton will need Matt Forte and Julian Edelman to really step up if they hope to avoid the upset this week, and to pick up their first postseason win since the 2012.

Chunky Monkeys was in danger of missing the playoffs for the first time in five years, but they managed to win WK11-12, and secure their postseason spot. Self-admittedly one of the weaker Monkeys teams in recent years, Evan recently traded for Mark Ingram to shore up an empty running game — an astonishing fourteen running backs have been used this season — and Kirk Cousins has been handed the reins after Matt Stafford and Dak Prescott were around for most of the year. It’s an open question if Julio Jones and Terrelle Pryor’s big play ability will be enough for these Monkeys to hit the second round...

Battle Angel (7-6) vs Philadelphia Phreaks (6-7)
Two equal, both 3-3, teams entered WK13, working to get home field advantage for their playoff matchup. To be honest, Battle Angel’s 98.1 - 83.8 victory doesn’t mean that much, except a slight uptick in confidence I guess. Neither team has put up a century game in three weeks, so this likely won’t be an explosive affair. If Drew Brees can put up a huge game, he could win this matchup almost by himself, perhaps needing just one explosive week from either T.Y. Hilton, Jarvis Landry, Stefon Diggs, or Kelvin Benjamin. Or maybe Vu will choose to go to the ground by throwing out Jeremy Hill and Jay Ajayi together? Let's see what Angel has in store for Phreaks when the game actually counts...

Ping's Phreaks average a league low 89.9 ppg, but they’ve battled to an almost 0.500 record this season, and secured an early playoff spot to boot. While they don’t have much top end explosiveness as a team, Ping’s team does have a superstar quarterback of his own: sophomore Marcus Mariota, who has put up incredible stats since a slow first month. Mariota has been pretty much just as good as Brees this season! Also, the strong running game of Devonta Freeman and Spencer Ware could present a roadmap to victory for Phreaks. Which of these teams will get to the next round?!

BYES
Tiiite End Jammers (10-3), Fat Jubas (9-4)
Well, Lei’s team is going for two out of three titles, and had an impressive bounce back from a post-championship hangover. Leading the league in wins and points — 117.2 per game — Jammers is coming off of four straight victories and has pushed past the century mark in each of their last seven games. Led by Andrew Luck, DeMarco Murray, LeVeon Bell, and Antonio Brown, plus the best kicker in the game (Matt Bryant), Jammers is the odds-on favorite to take their third title overall!

After making the Super Bowl last year on the “strength" of a 5-8 record, Fat Jubas will look to reappear in this year's championship game with a Spunky Misunderstood Geniuses division title in tow. The class of the division with 109.3 ppg, Eric’s team is riding David Johnson, the way underrated Mike Evans, and LeGarrette Blount toward their third title chance as well. It looks like Jubas will go with Matthew Stafford into the postseason, as Carson Palmer was dumped after starting most of the year. And despite a three game losing streak W6-8, Eric’s team has picked it up in recent weeks again, finishing strong with four wins in their last five games.

TOILET BOWL
#1 Athena Nike (6-7) vs #4 Fobsters (3-10)
It’s a battle of old Chinese school foes as Frank and Jimmy face off in RD1 of the Toilet Bowl. Athena Nike was actually the third highest scoring team in the league — at 109.1 ppg -- but they couldn’t get to 0.500 and started  the season off 2-5, torpedoing their playoff fortunes. The silver lining here is that Frank could draft #1 back-to-back if they can win the Toilet Bowl this year, which would be quite the cherry on top of his rebuild. Could Leonard Fournette join Ezekiel Elliot in Nike’s backfield next season?!

Similar story for Fobsters, as they’re the second highest scoring team in SMG division, and fourth overall. Despite that, Fobsters only acquired three wins this season, after getting pounded by a league leading 112.1 PA, and starting off 0-6. Even with Tom Brady back, Fobsters managed to dump their last four games too. The good news is that Brady, Melvin Gordon, and Jordy Nelson are playing hot right now, and there’s a chance Fobsters could upset their way to a Toilet Bowl finals.

#2 Dirty Birds (5-8) vs #3 Gang Green (4-9)
Our defending champs had a horrific year, as they faced a tough schedule and a multitude of injuries, including losing Adrian Peterson for the season early on. Dirty Birds had Matt Ryan, LeSean McCoy, and Odell Beckham submit stellar numbers but that wasn’t nearly enough, as they enter the Toilet Bowl having lost three of their last four, and clearly won’t get a chance to go back-to-back. The post-championship curse remains!

Facing off against his old college roommate, Greg’s Gang Green is coming into their matchup with four losses in their last five, so it’ll be a game of serious losers. The young arm of Derek Carr throwing to old guys Larry Fitzgerald and Michael Crabtree just wasn't enough this season, especially with an erratic ground game that provided no consistent presence. A number one overall pick would be great for the perpetually starless Greenies, but it’ll be an uphill battle to earn one this year.

Final Standings 2016

Full Standings Breakdown