Mid-Season 2016: Inscrutable Drama Kings

Is it just me or are these fantasy regular seasons just getting shorter? We’re already at the halfway point, so let’s take a look at how we’re doing! [SMG Mid-Season]

Tiiite End Jammers (4-2)
Don’t look now but our 2014 champs are back on track again! After a lost 4-8-1 season last year, Jammers are leading the league in points at 113.2 ppg and basically cakewalked through their first five weeks, before a matchup against Battle Angel in WK6. Still, Lei has be excited about his prospects for two championships in three years as LeVeon Bell is back from suspension and more importantly, DeMarco Murray is back as a fantasy force!

In addition, new quarterback Andrew Luck has found a rhythm with Antonio Brown and Demaryius Thomas quickly. Most of the draft additions from this year have been glued to the bench, and for good reason, as Jammers are poised to take control of the conference without touching any of his core. Watch out for the Tiiite Ends!

LA Buffy (4-2)
Despite a draft day trade that moved away the #1 overall pick, Buffy has emerged stronger than last year. All four of their wins have been century games for them, and they had a 116.2 - 112.2 barnburner against Athena Nike in WK2. They are riding the Cam Newton and AJ Green connection, along with TE Greg Olsen, who is actually the #3 overall WR/TE, one slot above Green. Who needs Rob Gronkowski when Olsen is so good? Oh wait, Rob Gronkoski is back himself, and now Buffy is playing two monster TEs, just like the real life Patriots. The ground game is powered by old men Matt Forte and Frank Gore, and that should be plenty.

To be honest, the Ezekiel Elliot trade now looks even worse in retrospect, as Russell Wilson is only a bye week replacement, Doug Baldwin and Jordan Reed have been up-and-down, and Thomas Rawls was already cut for a defense earlier in the year. None of those additions have helped Buffy get to where they are, and they could have had Elliot leading their backfield. Hindsight right? Sure, Gronk is back, but this trade is increasingly looking like Elliot for Gronk…

Chunky Monkeys (3-3)
We predicted a backslide for Evan’s team this year and our prediction looks prescient. While 0.500 ain’t bad, three wins is all the games Monkeys lost last season. A WK6 145.5 - 92.8 win against Fat Jubas handed the Spunky Misunderstood Genius leader their first loss of the season, and maybe that portends better things for Monkeys during the second half of the season. After all, they haven’t really been bad, just missing a decent ground game. Their leading rusher is Latavius Murray, who has been out since WK4. Charles Sims? Injured reserve. Theo Riddick? Injured and cut. Jerick McKinnon? Not AP’s replacement. The only stalwart has been Giovani Bernard, and outside of a return to form by Jamaal Charles, this ground game is weak.

Luckily, the air attack is fantastic! Julio Jones is otherworldly, Marvin Jones has been the best receiver in Detroit, Randall Cobb finally is back on track, and the multi-talented Terrell Pryor is the NFL’s most exciting player. With waiver wire pickup Matt Stafford coming in at #3 in the QB rankings, Monkeys could take their early season so-so performance and go right back into contention if they can find a better running attack.

Dirty Birds (3-3)
The defending champion curse lives! The Dirty Birds took a 54.5 point crap in WK1 and things haven’t gotten much better from there as Adrian Peterson and Sammy Watkins both hit the IR, and first round pick Golden Tate was almost cut until last week’s explosive game (on the bench). While 3-3 is better than last year’s putrid start, Jon’s back-to-back title hopes will depend on finding some more bodies to put in the lineup, as injuries have ravaged this squad.

The good news is Matt Ryan is the top ranked quarterback in the game, LeSean McCoy has been the second-best running back, and Odell Beckham has rediscovered his love for the game. Plus there’s the top ranked Vikings defense, which is averaging 15.0 ppg, five full points above the next closest team. If some receivers can be found to add to this team, Dirty Birds could return to the playoffs, although it’ll be a struggle. Also, the not-so-secret secret is out: Todd Gurley sucks!

Athena Nike (2-4)
You would think adding the next Emmitt Smith would do wonders for your win-loss record. Nope! Frank’s team has only recorded two wins this season as they came out of the gates 0-3, after facing off against conference foes who all scored 116+ against him. A 1.9 point win in WK4 was offset by a 0.4 point loss in WK6, and Nike is swimming at the bottom of the standings. Also, it’s looking like another season for Kevin White, who has a luxury condo on Frank’s IR spot.

The good news is that this team could heat up at any moment. DeAndre Hopkins, Amari Cooper, and Jimmy Graham are still top tier targets talent-wise, and DeVante Parker was looking strong for the first few weeks. The out-of-the-backfield pass catching prowess of Tevin Coleman is a nice complement to Ezekiel Elliot, and Athena Nike could be a steady quarterback — can a mysteriously declining Aaron Rodgers take over for #2 ranked QB, Ben Roethlisberger? — from righting the ship this season.

Mid-Season 2016: Spunky Misunderstood Geniuses

The second of our division looks... The best team in CTDB resides in SMG land this year and so does the worst team. Let’s find out who is which. No spoilers! [IDK Mid-Season]

Fat Jubas (5-1)
Were it not for a recent WK6 loss, Eric’s team would be undefeated and laughing hard at all the other teams around them. Instead, they’ll just have to settle for having the best fantasy player in the land, sophomore running back — and last season’s playoff hero — David Johnson. While some breakout players are just a flash in the pan, Johnson has just put up back-to-back 30+ games and there’s no question he’s here to stay. When will he get a proper nickname though?

One man does not a team make though, and Jubas is getting a solid season from last year’s disappointment, CJ Anderson. His teammate, Emmanuel Sanders has had some huge games too, and he joins Mike Evans and Alshon Jeffery as a solid receiving corps. In fact, this whole team is solid, from starting lineup to bench, as there’s LeGarrette Blount for touchdowns, Sammie Coates to drop/catch deep balls, and Terrance West and James White to add further backfield depth. With a hot Andy Dalton taking over for Carson Palmer, Jubas should feel great about their chances for another Super Bowl appearance after last year’s runner-up finish.

Battle Angel (4-2)
Seems like Vu loves to play close games! Aside from a WK1 and WK6 blowout, all four other games this season have been decided by less than double digits, with both of Angel’s losses coming by around four points. With a little luck, this team could have been undefeated. Clearly, the preseason trade down from their high draft pick has resulted in wins as Jarvis Landry and Kelvin Benjamin have both settled in as low end WR1s. That’s perfectly fine because the Drew Brees to TY Hilton connection has been marvelous and responsible for 32.3 and 15.4 ppg, respectively. This 2-11 2015 squad has already doubled their win total from last year!

And don’t look now but running back Christine Michael has finally emerged from fantasy sleeper land to post 24.1 / 17.5 / 21.8 points over his last three games. If Jay Ajayi can build off his huge WK6, Battle Angel could move away from a four receiver set, but for now it’s an open air attack. There’s also some nice young receivers waiting in the wings — Will Fuller, Stefon Diggs, Travis Benjamin — even if none of them have been overly consistent so far. Also, should anyone ever draft a Lions rookie running back again? Ameer Abdullah is on IR again...

Philadelphia Phreaks (3-3)
Much like Dracula, the Phreaks find their power at home, as they are 3-1 on their field, and despite a negative PF/PA rating, are batting 0.500. Our hearts go out to another lost season of Keenan Allen, who looked so good for about fifteen minutes. Without him, the receiver corps has been a little unsteady as Brandin Cooks and Allen Robinson have been kind of boom-bust, but maybe recent free agent pickup Cameron Meredith will help fill that void — since Sterling Shepard has cooled off.

Quarterback Marcus Mariota had a rough first month but has tossed six TDs in his last two games and could have found his groove. Behind him, the running game looks okay, with Devonta Freeman time sharing to top eight RB success, and maybe Spencer Ware can add some consistency to his two huge weeks. We’ll see what happens to the run game when Doug Martin returns to action next week. For now, the Phreaks remain a bit of a mystery, as they can’t get all their pieces firing at once, and haven’t put up 100+ points since the opening week of the season.

Gang Green (2-4)
Our defending division champs are having a rough go of it. On top of a tough schedule, they’re sorely under talented. Well, that’s not true, but this brew of new and old could be working better with more depth. For example, Derek Carr is the #6 QB (but he’s been on the bench behind Blake Bortles until last week), Larry Fitzgerald and Michael Crabtree are the #7 and #11 ranked receivers, and Lamar Miller is a top ten running back. Plus kicker Dustin Hopkins and Broncos defense are both top notch.

However, after all that top ten or better goodness is Mark Ingram and Brandon Marshall, who are ranked in the low-twenties for their positional rankings. So there’s a bit drop off in depth there. We gave Gang Green an “A” grade in their draft, and Carr and Crabtree have obviously worked out, but rookie Derrick Henry can’t get going, and Allen Hurns has topped double digits just once. The entire team seems to be trending downwards and Greg will need to find some emerald magic as the schedule is about to get much much tougher in the next month.

Fobsters (0-6)
There was once a time when Fobsters went winless for the entire season. Will Jimmy’s team repeat that inglorious honor from 2006? I mean, it doesn’t help when the entire team has only put up 100+ points once, and is facing the toughest schedule in the league, with a PA of 120.9 points against them. And in all fairness, this team has been decimated by injury, as they’ve cycled through seventeen players started already. Seventeen!

The heavily injured so far: rookie gem Corey Coleman, Dez Bryant, the since cut Eric Decker. Plus a smattering of other nicks from other guys. The run game has been quite good though, as Carlos Hyde and Melvin Gordon soak up touches and pound in touchdowns, even as they don't get much yardage. Shout out to the tubby corpse of Eddie Lacy, who can’t get past double digit points this year.

At least Jordy Nelson and Marcellus Bennett have been decent, and maybe Mike Wallace or Anquan Boldin can continue to barely hold the fort until Bryant’s return. The big hope for Fobsters NOT going winless is that Tom Terrific has returned, and he’s here to slay, with 39.7 and 37.0 points in his two games back. If Fobsters can catch some scheduling luck, they should be a top contender for the Toilet Bowl, since that’s exactly where they’re headed after this horrific start.