Catch the Damn Ball

Battle of the Champs

2011-12-22T11:21:00.000-08:00

In what might have been the most exciting divisional finals in CTDB history, the two winning teams won by 3.05 points total. Yes, it was that close. The Fat Jubas using a strong performance from Cam Newton and Reggie Bush to barely fend off Battle Angel's 49.0 point Drew Brees explosion. And on the other side, the Dirty Birds lost by 0.8 points as Buffy overtook them on MNF with David Akers and Steelers defense.

So now both number one seeds are ready to face off with a lot at stake. Roger has two championships under his belt and is desperate for a third. Eric could claim a spot on Mount CTDB by winning a second Super Bowl. Let's take a look at the matchups.

QB: It's Cam Newton versus Matt Ryan. On the surface it looks like Killer Cam has got this one all the way, as he hasn't scored less than twenty points in five weeks. However, Matt Ryan has been absolute fire recently and should be able to match the audacious rookie point for point. Both quarterbacks face off against terrible defenses so we're looking for big numbers here. EDGE: Even

RB: Earlier in the year we would have said Roger had a huge edge here as he boasted Arian Foster, Matt Forte, and even Steven Jackson. Post-Forte, Buffy has chosen to run-and-gun, even though Jackson had a big week on the bench during WK14. On the other side, Reggie Bush and Frank Gore are big names but more likely to top out at about thirty points total, assuming everything goes well. Bush has been resurgent the back half of the season but Gore hasn't been that great. If Arian Foster has a monster game and either of them stumble a bit, Roger could get the same production out of one RB as Eric gets out of two. Here's what's crazy, Chris Johnson and Darren McFadden will be sitting the bench for the Jubas. Who would have thought that from the beginning of the year?! EDGE: Buffy

WR: This entire matchup will hinge on which receivers play well for their respective teams. Buffy has Wes Welker, Victor Cruz, AJ Green, and Antonio Gates lined up. Usually two of them have great games, but if they suffer another combined weak outting like last week, that opens the door for the Fat Jubas. The Jubas have some boom and bust options themselves, with Vincent Jackson, Jimmy Graham, and Santana Moss starting. It's hard to call who has the edge here, but we believe Wes Welker can't have another bad game with Brady slinging him the ball. EDGE: Buffy

K/DEF: Normally this reporter could care less what a K and Def are like for playoff matchups, but seeing as this reporter lost to exactly that combination last week, we'll take a look at who is playing defense for each of our championship contenders. Buffy has Steelers defense facing off against the Rams. After putting up only 4 points last week, we think they'll bounce back to their low double figures form. As for the Eric's Niners defense, they destroyed Pittsburgh last week and will now face off against the Seattle offense. We can't see anything lower than 15 points here. EDGE: Fat Jubas

We think this is Buffy's Super Bowl to lose, but if these playoffs have shown us anything, it'll be a nail biter!

Toilet Bowl II

2011-12-21T10:21:00.000-08:00

Some guys just hate to lose! Even when down and out, after a season that saw them knocked out of the post-season for the first time ever, Evan and his Chunky Monkeys rallied hard to end the season on a high note. They demolished the Tiiite End Jammers on their way to a Toilet Bowl victory by throwing up their highest week of the season. Sure it's not a championship but at least it's something right?

Quarterback Matthew Stafford connected with Calvin Johnson to put up 79.95 points together, and that was more than enough to send Lei's team packing. Heck, Evan even had a ton of guys on his bench -- including an unused 33.2 points from CJ Spiller. The Tiiite End Jammers tried to make a comeback behind Tony Romo's 34.45 points but they just couldn't keep up on the scoreboard despite scoring 101.15 points.

For both teams, the future will be that much brighter with some top picks. Lei's team will need an infusion of new talent, as they're a little light on quality depth. However, with Romo, Maurice Jones-Drew, and Percy Harvin, they are at least better than a year ago. As for Evan, we predict a quick return to contention as they have Ryan Mathews, DeMarco Murray, Felix Jones, CJ Spiller, Antonio Brown, Brandon Marshall, and Julio Jones to select from. Not only that, Jamaal Charles returns next year and a top pick will likely bolster the roster even more. The only real question for them this off-season is which QB to keep: Philip Rivers or Matt Stafford?

Thanks for an entertaining Toilet Bowl II boys, and better luck next year!

Playoffs: Division Finals

2011-12-14T05:46:00.001-08:00

Buffy (9-4) vs Dirty Birds (8-5)
After eaking out another miracle win, the Dirty Birds are about to change their name to "The Tebows." Or perhaps "The Gronks" would be more appropriate, as Rob Gronkowski set an NFL record for tight end touchdowns and scored 31 points to lead the upset of high powered Ante Up -- who almost came back on a huge MNF run by the Seahawks defense. Now the newly dubbed Gronky Tebows face off against Buffy, another two time champion. There's a lot on the line here, as historically, both franchises win it all when they reach the Super Bowl round.

Roger's team boasts Wes Welker and that could be a huge factor, as he and Gronkowski tend to trade off big games for New England. It could be Welker's turn this weekend. QB Matt Ryan had a career game during the bye, and he's going to continue his steady leadership. The big question for Buffy is if they'll leave Arian Foster as the lone back or think about substituting Steven Jackson. As of now, Welker is joined by Victor Cruz, A.J. Green, and a very healthy Antonio Gates. Of the four, Cruz seems to be sliding a bit but he's fantastic overall. There's a lot of depth on this team, it's just a question of which players will get the starting nod.

For Jon, he'll have his Big Four wide receivers too, in some combination of Gronkowski, Roddy White, Larry Fitzgerald and either Dwayne Bowe or Miles Austin. The question is if Adrian Peterson will return to balance out the running game. Rookie Roy Helu has been good the past few weeks but he's unlikely to replace All Day. As we noted in a previous post, it's going to take at least a 100+ game to beat Buffy, as they haven't dipped below that plateau in two months. Does Tebow have one more magic upset left in him? We're about to find out!

Fat Jubas (7-6) vs Battle Angel (6-7)
All it took for Battle Angel to dispatch the Fobsters was Drew Brees and some defense. Brees scored 29.45 points and Packers defense added another 20.0 for Vu. Nobody else scored in double digits for them though. However, Jimmy's team didn't fare much better, with Tom Brady exploding for 34.65 points but then his Cowboys defense adding a whopping negative ten points to the till. This has to be the first case of a defense costing a team a playoff win. I mean, without that -10, and having any standard defense in for the Cowboys to accrue one point, the Fobsters would be facing off against division champ Fat Jubas instead.

It looks like Eric's team could be in for an easy weekend if they can just clear the century mark. Heck, scoring 90+ could be enough as Vu's team is dinged up all around. Andre Johnson is iffy, Greg Jennings is out, and there's a murderer's row lineup of Cedric Benson, Mike Tolbert, Malcolm Floyd, and....need I go on? Vu's team is in big trouble this week, and it might not matter what Drew Brees is capable of.

The Fat Jubas are just too strong right now in comparison. They have their own ultra-fantasy quarterback in Cam Newton. They have Frank Gore and Chris Johnson in the backfield. Vincent Jackson will clearly be better than his teammate Floyd. And there's Jimmy Graham around to take a little juice off of Brees' points. To be honest, we don't see how Eric loses this one, short of a total meltdown, as they've been consistently near the century mark all season long. It would be nice to say both of these former champs have an equal chance of winning their second Super Bowl, but the numbers are showing us a beat down by Fat Jubas.

Toilet Bowl II Preview

2011-12-14T01:45:00.000-08:00

#1 Chunky Monkeys (7-6) vs #3 Tiiite End Jammers (5-8)
Lei has been pissed off about not having more success the last, well, half decade or so. His Tiiite End Jammers haven't been in a championship game since before Justin Bieber was born. And now they're in the final game of a Toilet Bowl! The Jammers were so fired up that they pounded out an astonishing 156.95 points last weekend to fend off Gang Green's high scoring effort. Behind forty plus points each from Tony Romo and Maurice Jones-Drew, Lei has assured himself of at least a high draft pick next season. Season ticket sales are already up 5%!

The Chunky Monkeys were much less effusive in their victory last weekend, grimly dispatching Ping's Phreaks by a perfunctory score of 105.95 - 98.6. The score was closer than the game was, as MNF gave Marshawn Lynch a shot at the upset, but he couldn't quite deliver. So now the Monkeys are in a championship, of sorts. Their front office released no season ticket holder news but we saw a lot of angry fans protesting outside, demanding their seat licenses back. It must irk owner Evan to no end that his Monkeys are 5-1 over the past few weeks, yet he's only playing for a consolidation prize.

The Jammers have a little streak of their own, three wins in a row, and they are coming off their best back-to-back scores all season. While Romo and Jones-Drew can hardly be expected to duplicate their efforts, there's the potential here for a nice win if Percy Harvin and Marques Colston (combined 47.9 points WK14) can keep up their great pass catching ways.

On the other side, the Monkeys need to just keep doing what they've been doing all season long, bringing a flurry of boom and bust players off the bench and into the lineup. There could be some tough decisions to be made this weekend, as Philip Rivers and Julio Jones are making the case that maybe they should be starting. We know Ryan Mathews, DeMarco Murray, and Antonio Brown are locks, but the mighty Megatron has been very mortal over the past month. We see a pretty even split for the two teams, but we think it would be nice if the Jammers could win something of value this season.

Playoffs Week 1

2011-12-07T22:04:00.001-08:00

Battle Angel (6-7) vs Fobsters (6-7)
These two teams split their regular season matchup and only Battle Angel's superior PF gave them the home field advantage. Both teams lost coming into the playoffs -- and scored less than 90 points each -- so neither really has a momentum advantage. During the last four weeks, the Fobsters have only scored over the century mark one time. Battle Angle has done it twice, and was definitely more consistent the other weeks in-between. Still, this will be a close battle.

Vu's team will be led by Drew Brees and his throwing arm. The bad news is that the receiving corps is a little thin right now. Greg Jennings has been good all season, but Andre Johnson got hurt again and Vernon Davis and Malcolm Floyd are barely capable starters. Also, getting a break out season from RB Fred Jackson was great, but now Jackson is done for the year and an ailing Cedric Benson or recent free agent pickup Mike Tolbert will have to step in. That's not good.

As for the Fobsters, they are similarly constructed with a great QB and a wide open passing game. Tom Brady will lead Steve Smith, Jason Witten, Jordy Nelson, and Dez Bryant into their matchup. That should be enough to give them the edge. The problem is, their prize off-season acquisition, Michael Turner, has been slowed by injury recently and probably won't give them much of a ground game either. Look for this game to come down to which quarterback can submit the bigger game and which receiver will explode to help his team to a win!

Ante Up (8-5) vs Dirty Birds (8-5)
Both times they met this season, Ante Up wiped the floor with Dirty Birds, scoring over 120+ each game and beating the flailing birds by an average of 63.225 points. Ouch. However, those games were all played early in the season, before the Tebow Experience. Since switching to Tebow in WK11, the Birds haven't lost, eaking out wins against opponents that scored 68.1, 72, and 87.85 points. Most of those wins came without Adrian Peterson playing either.

After starting off 1-5, the DBs ended the season on a 6-1 streak, which can be attributed to their run-and-shoot attack that featured Larry Fitzgerald, Roddy White, Dwayne Bowe, and most importantly, Rob Gronkowski. The amazing tight end was the sixth best RB/WR/TE in fantasy this year, and has gone over twenty points in four of his last five games.

All of this is impressive but the magic train could stop here as Jon faces off against Jae, owner of the highest scoring team this year -- by a wide margin. Ante Up hasn't scored less than 100 points since WK7, and in fact, only had two games less than that mark this season. They have routinely shot past the 140+ point mark MVP candidate Aaron Rodgers and an astounding ground game led by LeSean McCoy and Ray Rice. Rodgers is the best QB in the land and McCoy and Rice are the top two backs.

The reason Ante Up didn't win a few more games probably had to do with their underpowered receiving crew, which is headlined by Santonio Holmes and a fading Reggie Wayne. It took a late season surge by Laurent Robinson to give Ante Up some consistent play from the position. Odds are good that Ante Up will mow down the Dirty Birds for a win (especially if Peterson remains on the sidelines), but you never know when Tebow magic is in the house!

Toilet Bowl Seedings

2011-12-07T22:02:00.000-08:00

#1 Chunky Monkeys (7-6)
The defending champions were flying high from WK8-12, winning four games out of five, vaulting over the century mark each time, and setting themselves up for a playoff spot. Then disaster struck in WK13 as they got creamed by Fat Jubas, losing by 53 points. And so the streak ends; ten straight years in the playoffs is over. Most seasons, a winning record would have preserved Evan's precious record, but they were ultimately undone by the lose of Jamaal Charles early, the inconsistency of Philip Rivers all around, and emphatic answer to "Is Ryan Mathews the next LDT?"

The good news is, Evan's trade for Calvin Johnson was a fantastic move, he used Matthew Stafford to step in for Rivers, and he unearthed DeMarco Murray, Julio Jones, and Antonio Brown. If they can secure a top pick here, the Monkeys will easily be right back in contention. So enjoy their downfall CTDB, it may not last for long! "Ding Dong! The Wicked Witch is dead!"

#2 Gang Green (5-8)
Another two time champ disgraced. The Greenies lost their last four games to go from penthouse to cellar in record time. They even faced the softest schedule in the division. The wheels came off for Greg this year, as his normally golden touch on the waiver wire was nowhere to be found. In fact, there wasn't one guy he picked up that contributed much of anything. And with the three headed "monster" of Peyton Hillis, Shonn Greene, and Ahmad Bradshaw not giving him much of anything, Greg's season went down the tubes. Eli Manning was also forced into action after Matt Schaub left the building.

The upside is that there are some serviceable receivers here, with Hakeem Nicks, Stevie Johnson, and Brandon Lloyd getting steady double digit points. However, without much of a run game, and no magic elixir from the free agent pool, Greg slid to another losing season, just like last year.

#3 Tiiite End Jammers (5-8)
Lei's team hasn't won in the playoffs since their championship in 2003, and they haven't made the post-season since 2008. This year, they were eliminated from contention early, even as the rest of the league fell into extreme parity. Their five total wins is a bit of a mirage, as they won two games at the end to even up the pace a little. And the Jammers can't blame scheduling either, as they faced the easiest schedule in the league.

What's weird is that there are some good pieces here. The trade for Maurice Jones-Drew turned out wonderfully, and Percy Harvin could be a star. Sure Rashard Mendenhall has had a tough season, but at least Tony Romo has been slinging it. Looking over the roster, there does seem to be a big drop off in talent after the top two or three players. Marques Colston is a borderline starter, Sidney Rice has nothing going on, and while WR Eric Decker and RB Willis McGahee have helped the real life Broncos, they've done next to nothing for the Jammers. As our first two time participant in the Toilet Bowl, the Lei will look to do better than their one point loss in last year's first round. Analysts suggest perhaps a name change, to wash the stink off the franchise's recent exploits.

#4 Philadelphia Phreaks (4-9)
Speaking of name changes, Ping's team could use a re-branding too. After finally making the playoffs last season, after who knows how long, the Phreaks regressed right back to their losing ways. They dropped their last five games, didn't break the century mark after WK5, and often struggled to put up even 80+ points as the lowest scoring team in the league.

As usual, GM Ping went all in with the Eagles and this time it was to disastrous results. Michael Vick was still fantasy good -- until he went down in WK10 -- but Jeremy Maclin and DeSean Jackson both suffered through injuries, suspensions, and just terrible play. Jahvid Best also caught the injury bug and last year's sensation, RB LeGarrette Blount had only four games over double digits. The good news is Marshawn Lynch has put up amazing numbers the past five weeks (20.8, 25.2, 15.9, 19.6, 26.8); the bad news is he's only gotten off the Phreaks bench for the last two. A few victories in the Toilet Bowl would be nice here, as this franchise hasn't gotten a post-regular season win since 2006.

Celebrating the Division Winners

2011-12-06T00:17:00.000-08:00

This year, our division winners didn't really emerge until the last weekend. In fact, this entire season was full of ups and downs as eight out of ten teams were in contention heading into the last two weeks. I mean, take a look at the standings prior to our last week of the regular season. At the of the day, it was Buffy who conquered Inscrutable Drama Kings and Fat Jubas who stands alone as the leader of the Spunky Misunderstood Geniuses.

Buffy (9-4)
Starting off 0-3, Roger's team was headed toward a horrible season. Aside from Wes Welker, there was nobody else ready to play after the lockout. Then, Buffy turned it all around and won seven straight, surpassing the century mark each time, and only lost one more game the rest of the way. Yes, a gaudy 9-1 mark to close the regular season out and secure a division championship!

Wes Welker was the unquestioned MVP of this team. He was the best receiver in the game this year, and he slowed down but never faltered. Also, free agent Victor Cruz was somehow the fourth best WR this season, and Roger got a few good games out of that pickup. Then there's A.J. Green, who would be fantasy rookie of the year if not for Cam Newton. Green is going to end up at number ten on the overall WR list. Plus there's Pierre Garcon, intriguing deep threat Torrey Smith, and the still injury ridden Antonio Gates around (still a top TE when healthy). A greying receiving crew with Hines Ward and Ochocinco have been completely replaced by promising talent all around.

Despite starting the year off slow with an injury, RB Arian Foster steamed up the charts after WK3, coinciding with Buffy's winning streak. Foster will end up being the third best RB this season, one slot ahead of Matt Forte, who exploded early but tailed off a little by mid-season. Forte could be gone for most of the playoffs, which could hurt Buffy's running game. Old stalwart Steven Jackson will likely be relegated to the scrap heap after this season, but perhaps he has one shining post-season run left in him.

As for that tricky QB spot, Buffy made do with Matt Ryan most of the year, occasionally turning to Matt Cassell and Jay Cutler when needed. Ryan has actually been a top eight option this year, which bodes well for Roger's title hopes. Andy Dalton is on-board to provide some injury relief. Also, Buffy split time between the Ravens and Steelers Defense, with both ranked in the top five all year long. With two championships under their belt (2001 and 2004), Buffy is in prime position to be the first to get their third trophy.

Fat Jubas (7-6)
Facing the toughest schedule in their division, Eric's team needed to also score the most points to secure a hard fought division title. That's two in a row for the Jubas. Last year's division title was a nice rebound from a poor year in 2009, but after being upset by the Fobsters in the divisional finals, this team wanted another chance to chase the championship.

Eric's team didn't really have a dominant run this season, as they started 2-2, never won more than two games in a row, and more or less alternated wins and losses to become the only team over .500 in their division. Their two best players this season were QB Cam Newton and Jimmy Graham, waiver wire pickups who didn't even arrive on the team until WK2 and WK3 respectively. Graham was the second best TE and would be the fourth best WR/TE in combined charts, so it's obvious he is tremendous.

Killer Cam was the fourth best QB this year, and he saved his best game for the division winning kill by dropping 42.8 points in WK13. There's a good chance that Cam will be the face of this franchise, and not Peyton Manning, who could be unceremoniously dumped after this season. Actually, there's 100% chance Cam is the new face of the franchise and Manning is headed to the re-draft. Did you think anyone would say that six months ago?!

You could say that the entire rest of the Jubas's roster was a disappointment this season. Yes, Vincent Jackson was a top eight receiver, but there were an awful lot of low single digit games on his resume this year. Anquan Boldin had a nice mid-season stretch but barely averaged ten points per game. He played a lot as the third WR for Jubas, but probably because there wasn't much better behind him. Tony Gonzalez was about the same as Boldin, Dallas Clark was a disaster sans Peyton, and Burress caught TDs but was hardly used.

And how about those running backs? Chris Johnson was so bad that there was talk of cutting him. He's picked up his game just in time for the playoffs, but Johnson's post-holdout campaign has to be disappointing. As for Frank Gore, who led a resurgent 49ers team, he's been shackled by injury ever since WK10, and he could sit in favor of the surprising Reggie Bush, who has been a nice surprise this season. Johnson and Gore were supposed to be top five backs, not top fifteenth. In sum, the Jubas perserved through what could have been a tough season, with franchise guys Manning and Johnson practically useless. Instead they hawked the waiver wire, emerged with some new cornerstones, and will be looking to advance to another Super Bowl.

Final Standings 2011

2011-12-05T23:37:00.000-08:00

The Savior is Here!

2011-10-18T19:23:00.001-07:00

After a 76.4 - 122.7 loss to division leader Ante Up this past week, the Dirty Birds are in desperate straits. Despite a roster featuring the likes of Adrian Peterson, Roddy White, Larry Fitzgerald, Miles Austin, Dwayne Bowe, and Rob Gronkowski, the Birds are have only two wins and three straight losses.

Keeper RB Knowshon Moreno has proven to be a huge bust (again) and while Darren Sproles and Mike Tolbert have their uses, this team needs an injection of leadership and ground game. Welcome to the Tim Tebow era! Needing to find an answer after suffering through Ben Roethlisberger and the recently released Josh Freeman, GM Jon scooped up the Tebow last week and quickly got him up to speed on the play book. Management is hoping that Tebow is the second coming of Michael Vick / Cam Newton and fan interest is already up 210%.

A team executive spoke off the record. "After missing the playoffs last year with this stellar roster, we can't afford to miss it again this season. My mom would kick my ass if I had all these great players and didn't get into the post-season."

One reason floated for the Dirty Birds' early season struggles is a tough schedule. So far, the Birds have faced the hardest schedule in the league by a landslide and faced opponents scoring 120+ points in four of the first six weeks. Here's hoping that the WK7 matchup against Chunky Monkeys will start the turnaround, as the Jon smoked Evan 156 - 127.80 in WK2 before going 1-3 right afterwards.

Te-bow! Te-bow! Te-bow!

Early Season Power Rankings

2011-10-07T13:41:00.000-07:00

Parity has set in right? Have we ever been four weeks into a season and NOT had a winless team? Well this year we not only have no winless teams, and the entire Spunky Misunderstood Geniuses division is at 0.500 or better. The only two teams with a losing record in the league are Buffy and Tiiite End Jammers, and they are only one game out of first place in this young season. Let's take a quick look at how everyone's teams are faring in our first four weeks.

Fobsters (3-1)
Can one man lead a team to the top? Well, when that man is Tom Brady, currently averaging 36.7 ppg, that answer is "yes." While losing Calvin Johnson must hurt, RB Michael Turner has been providing the grinding work he was acquired for. With WR Steve Smith having a comeback year -- paired with Cam Newton -- the Fobsters have the parts to stay at the top along with TE Jason Witten, RB Beanie Wells, and WRs Dez Bryant and Jordy Nelson. Of course it's been nice to play the second easiest schedule in the league, but the Fobsters have been over 100+ three times already and lost only to a 135 point Battle Angels' explosion in WK3.

Ante Up (2-2)
Our highest scoring team in the league, it's incredible what Aaron Rodgers has been doing so far. He's averaging 37.9 points per outing and sits atop the fantasy world, especially after his recent 58 point outing in WK4. Jae's team also features two 20+ ppg running backs in LeSean McCoy and Ray Rice. The concern for this team is in the WR department, where rising star Kenny Britt was tragically derailed for the season, and old veteran Reggie Wayne misses Peyton Manning something awful. So far Santonio Holmes, Lance Moore, and Mario Manningham have not been the answer. If Ante Up can find some receivers, this team could ascend another level.

Gang Green (3-1)
As always, Greg's team is faring well. WR Steve Johnson has continued his ascent, becoming a top ten receiver. Hakeem Nicks isn't far behind either, as he averages 14.7 ppg, good for eleventh best WR on the charts. With RB Peyton Hillis proving that he's not a one year wonder and Ahmad Bradshaw emerging as a reliable running mate (pushing underwhelming Shonn Greene out of the picture), the backfield is solid if unspectacular. Overall the Greenies have been very consistent, putting up 100+ in each of their first four games. Despite not being explosive, they have acquired a lofty perch by taking care of business and beating teams when they stumble.

Fat Jubas (2-2)
Things were not looking good in Jubaville as franchise QB Peyton Manning was on the sidelines to begin the season. Then GM Eric took Cam Newton off the waiver wire in WK2 and everything changed. Oh and how about Darren McFadden, who finally has solidified his status as a fantasy all-star. McFadden is the third best non-QB in the game right now, and he continues to look great each week. With Chris Johnson barely rounding into shape after his lockout, Frank Gore has been working to get his way into the lineup. Eric has juggled a lot of players this season and if all three RBs start playing to their expectations, he may need to move one of them. On the receiver side, it's TE Jimmy Graham taking the fantasy world by storm as he averages 16.7 ppg while never having touched single digits. He pairs nicely with deep threat Vincent Jackson on the outside. With Killer Cam now the automatic starter, we see the Jubas climbing the standings very soon.

Battle Angel (2-2)
Somehow Vu's team has put up the second most points in the league this season. Yes, QB Drew Brees is up at 32.0 ppg, and sure WR Greg Jennings has been amazing. But with Cedric Benson and DeAngelo Williams both sucking it up in the backfield, how is this team winning? May we offer Fred Jackson! Our draft analysis said, "While we like Fred Jackson, he'll hardly be the new face of the franchise." Well 20+ ppg later, he just might be! The Angels could be in for some dark times though, as Andre Johnson is out for his customary mid-season injury break, and there is nobody helping Fred out in the backfield. Maybe if rookie Daniel Thomas can crank it up some, Vu's team can keep fighting for a playoff spot.

Chunky Monkeys (2-2)
The Monkeys had a chance to go 3-1 this pass weekend but lost on MNF to LeGarrette Blount's late night heroics. With Jamaal Charles out for the year, the Monkeys have a big hole to fill in the backfield. The good news is that sophomore RB Ryan Mathews has finally become dependable option, and is #8 among non-QBs so far. Even better, recently acquired WR Calvin Johnson has set the record books on fire with his eight touchdowns in four games streak. He has been absolutely carrying the receiving corps, as Brandon Marshall, Santana Moss, and Jermichael Finley have been erratic at best. Rookie WR Julio Jones may be coming on though, which would be a desperately needed complement to Johnson. While down on his luck this season, Evan's team is still looking pretty good, even as it's come down to earth some.

Philadelphia Phreaks (2-2)
The Phreaks could have one more win, but they lost by 0.40 in WK1 to Battle Angel upon debut of our decimal scoring system. Ping is the only owner to not have made one lineup move so far, and considering the wide gap in quality between his starters and his bench, he may not need to until byes hit. While newly acquired Michael Vick hasn't been able to lead the Eagles to victory, his 24.5 ppg has still been just as advertised. For a team that hasn't really hit their stride yet, the Phreaks are very well balanced with upside at every position. WR Mike Wallace is a true number one, and the combination of DeSean Jackson and Jeremy Maclin means at least one of them will produce each week. Jahvid Best has surprisingly outperformed LeGarrette Blount but that's hardly a bad thing. We see the Phreaks taking a big step forward in upcoming weeks as Vick and Co. start to go into hyperdrive.

Dirty Birds (2-2)
When there's no clear leadership, sometimes a talented ship can go astray. GM Jon has continued to select the wrong QB to lead his team, alternating between Josh Freeman and Ben Roethlisberger on wrong weeks. That will have to stop. While Adrian Peterson has quietly been a top back, a big gaping hole at RB2 is there, despite having Mike Tolbert and Darren Sproles on the roster, both of whom deserve a starting nod. The vaunted passing attack has been good, but having Calvin Johnson still around sure would have been nice. Instead, TE sensation Rob Gronkowski is going to be the fourth receiver here. The Birds have proven to be explosive but also highly inconsistent. They'll have to find more consistent play from the QB position if they hope to soar this season.

Buffy (1-3)
Who's the best fantasy receiver in the land? How about Wes Welker! With ten catches a game, 616 yards, and 5 TDs already under his belt, Mr. Welker is having an all universe year. Not only is he the top receiver around, he's the best non-QB player so far this season. With Arian Foster struggling with injuries early on, Matt Forte has been outstanding, with 22.1 ppg and ranking in the top five overall. QB Jay Cutler was great for three weeks before last week's stumble, but he should remain the starter. What this team needs is receivers who can help out Welker. So far it's been rookie AJ Green who has been the top contributer, which is great news, but Buffy needs more. This team is on the rise though, as they've fought hard WK1-3 before notching an explosive victory versus Ante Up in WK4.

Tiiite End Jammers (1-3)
The only team so far in CTDB not averaging 100+ per week, in this season of wild scoring, the Jammers may find themselves slightly underpowered. The first Jammer to appear on the non-QB scoring rankings is waiver wire WR Eric Decker, who has only played two games for the franchise. New Jammer RB Maurice Jones-Drew has been okay, but averaging 13.8 ppg isn't going to carry this team to any victories. Tony Romo has been a top ten QB so far this season but his health continues to be a question and he'll likely split time with Ryan Fitzpatrick some more. What the Jammers need is for all of their receivers to step up, and to find out what is wrong with Rashard Mendenhall. Otherwise the Jammers are only going to be a top contender for the Toilet Bowl.

Grading the 2011 Draft

2011-08-25T00:00:00.000-07:00

A summer that threatened lockout and a late beginning to the NFL. Whew, glad we dodged that one. Officially kicking off our second decade, Catch the Damn Ball heads into its eleventh season with the Chunky Monkeys on top and quite a few past champions sitting at the bottom of the standings. Let's take a look at what everyone reloaded with, during an exciting and trade heavy off-season. These grades mainly reflect what was done with the draft slot opportunity, and how the players acquired project to help their teams this upcoming season.

1. Battle Angels
After winning the inaugural Toilet Bowl -- an accomplishment since the Angels had the worst record last year -- Vu knew exactly who to target with his number one pick. Because he already had Saints QB Drew Brees in the fold, Vu stepped away from Mark Ingram toward Dolphins rookie RB Daniel Thomas. Pundits are split on which rookie RB will have the most impact, but Thomas has just as good a chance as anyone else. There's a clear need for another breakout back on this team, as keepers DeAngelo Williams and Cedric Benson are probably middle of the pack due to situation or talent. While we like Fred Jackson, he'll hardly be the new face of the franchise. And seventh round pick Ronnie Brown is an afterthought.

The Battle Angels will be primarily an aerial team again this season, as Austin Collie, Vernon Davis, James Jones, and Malcolm Floyd will be productive complements next to Andre Johnson and Greg Jennings. Vu also went all in with the Pack, by scooping up their defense in RD6. Even with a number one overall pick, this NFL draft offered no clear superstars, so Vu went with a mixed collecton of young veterans with upside. We gave the Angels draft last year an A-, but that actually turned out to be way off as they bottomed out. Perhaps this low relatively low grade will end up opposite of predictions also.
Grade: B

2. Dirty Birds
After a pair of off-season trades, this franchise went from having two top ten backs to possibly going run and shoot for the immediate future. Michael Turner was essentially exchanged for Roddy White, and the Birds had only Knowshon Moreno as a second back heading into the draft. GM Jon went RB heavy with his mid-round picks, grabbing rookie Roy Helu, Mike Tolbert, and Rashad Jennings in successive rounds. None of them are starters -- same with eighth round pick Javon Ringer -- and all are involved in timeshares. Hum.

The good news is the arrival of Dwayne Bowe and Michael Crabtree give the WR corps a very strong look. White, Larry Fitzgerald, Miles Austin, and Bowe are the best receiving group in the league, and they'll have to be as the Birds look to spread the field. This year's two-headed QB attack will be Ben Roethlisberger and Josh Freeman. Without the addition of Bowe, we're thinking this draft might have been less than average as there is still gaping holes next to Adrian Peterson.
Grade: C+

3. Tiiite End Jammers
Right before the draft started, GM Lei shipped off Michael Vick in exchange for RB Maurice Jones-Drew, giving his backfield a great one-two punch. With Rashard Mendenhall, Jones-Drew, and Ryan Grant in the fold, the Jammers needed some receivers to pair with Percy Harvin. The drafting department went right to work, using five of their first six picks on pass catchers. Marques Colston and Hines Ward have both seen better days but they're still able to contribute. Young guys like Sidney Rice, Mike Thomas, Johnny Knox, and Jacoby Ford all have potential, and should one of them follow through, that would greatly boost the Jammers' chances of finally returning to the playoffs.

The Vick for MJD trade also involved a fifth round swap, which basically amounted to RBs Marshawn Lynch for Ryan Torain. We're not sure if Torain will see much time in a crowded Redskins backfield, but the Jammers probably won't need him much this season. QB Tony Romo has been given the vote of confidence and Lei will need him to stay healthy this time around.
Grade: B+

4. Gang Green
Traditionally, the draft is the appetizer to Gang Green's in-season free agent meals. Their draft plan is generally this: Grab a few Michigan guys here, draft a couple of New York players there, and wait for the waiver wire to open. Last year's keeper core was mostly decimated due to injury and retirement so this year's keeper five features three players acquired through free agency last year: Peyton Hillis, Steve Johnson, and Brandon Lloyd. Disappointing Shonn Greene was the only returning player, along with last year's first round pick, breakout WR star Hakeem Nicks.

This year first rounder yielded another Giants player with nice upside in Ahmad Bradshaw, who has excellent potential. RB BenJarvus Green-Ellis won't score 13 TDs again but he'll prove a useful backup. Unsurprisingly, Matt Schaub and Eli Manning are the QBs Greg went with, both very familiar to this franchise. Braylon Edwards, Kellen Winslow, and Roy Williams rounded out the draft, none of whom we're much excited about. We like Bradshaw, the two quarterbacks and Jets Defense, but really the draft has never been crucial to this team's success.
Grade: C+

5. Ante Up
GM Jae has been on a roll with his drafts recently, unearthing Aaron Rodgers, Ray Rice, and LeSean McCoy. With his backfield beautifully positioned for the future, Jae was looking to add some depth behind fading Reggie Wayne and promising Kenny Britt. First rounder Santonio Holmes is going to have a big comeback season and we think he's a steal here. Second rounder Mario Manningham could be headed for a big step up too, after proving he was a big playmaker for the Giants last season. Heck, even Lance Moore could step in for a few games if necessary.

Even with Rice and McCoy locked up, Jae felt the need to grab four more RBs -- Jonathan Stewart, CJ Spiller, Joseph Addai, Michael Bush. Every one of those guys, save Spiller, has proven to be useful in some capacity in their careers. As backups they'll be more than enough, and one could serve as useful trait bait if necessary. We are big fans of Jae's draft and think he made all the right moves to stay in contention after making it to the divisional finals last year. True story: Ante Up scored the most points during the record season last year.
Grade: A

6. Philadelphia Phreaks
The bold trade for Michael Vick is going to determine whether or not the Phreaks have back-to-back winning seasons for the first time in their franchise's history. Vick is a game changer and if he can deliver on even 75% of his promise, the Phreaks can book a spot in the playoffs. Of course, giving up their only reliable running back created a huge hole in the backfield. GM Ping moved to fill that quickly with LeGarrette Blount, who came on really strong during his rookie year. He'll fill one spot in the empty backfield but we're not sold on Jahvid Best staying healthy -- but watch out if he can! This year's rookie RB, Ryan Williams, just ruptured his patella tendon and is already out for the season. That means Ping is going to need Best, Marshawn Lynch, or Falcons' rookie backup Jacquizz Rogers to be there behind Blount. We think they'll need more.

What the Phreaks do have is an outstanding passing attack, anchored by DeSean Jackson, Jeremy Maclin, and Mike Wallace, who had a fantastic breakout season last year. Pierre Garcon, Davone Bess, and Deion Branch will provide depth but we can't see any of them hitting the field behind that fabulous starting trio, short of injury or bye weeks. Ping went all in with the Eagles -- as usual -- by selecting their defense and special teams in RD4. An ex-Eagle, Kevin Kolb, will serve as Vick's backup this season and he's sure to see the field at some point.
Grade: C+, downgraded due to the unfortunate Williams injury

7. Fat Jubas
A last to first performance for the Jubas. That's what happens when you trade for Peyton Manning, Chris Johnson, and have Darren McFadden finally emerge. The Jubas have an intimidating roster, with Frank Gore also on-board, and last year's draft freebie, WR Vincent Jackson back in Chargers' powder blue for a full season. The Jubas have never had back-to-back winning seasons either, which is a bit surprising. We're going to find out real quick if last year's success can be duplicated as Manning is suffering from a scary neck issue still, and Johnson is holding out for mega-bucks.

Eric loves his veterans, and especially his tight ends. Last year's team featured four or five TEs on the roster and this year the Jubas have Dallas Clark, Marcedes Lewis, and Owen Daniels ready to go too. Next to Jackson, we're looking at a bounce back season for Anquan Boldin and maybe a little something from Plaxico Burress. With this many veteran pass catchers around, the Jubas will be fine, if not necessarily spectacular passing the ball. Sleeper rookie DeMarco Murray could start very soon, and we like him ten times as much as Brandon Jacobs, who doesn't offer much more than a few yards and some touchdown work.
Grade: B

8. Buffy
Despite being upset in the first round last year by Ante Up, Buffy had a very successful 2010 campaign. Second best record in the league, the second most points scored, Arian Foster emerging as a fantasy monster, and nice multi-dimensional seasons from Matt Forte and Stephen Jackson. There were a lot of failures in the receivers department though, as Wes Welker was off his game and Antonio Gates was dinged up quite a bit. Enter rookie AJ Green, the new hope for a healthy passing game. With the Bengals stuck in offensive purgatory, Green is a great pick but likely at least a year away. That means Chad Ochocinco will have to step up his game -- a 50-50 toss up. The WR we're high on is actually Danny Amendola, who will have a more experienced Sam Bradford tossing him the rock.

The QBs Roger tagged to start off the season are Matt Ryan and Jay Cutler, with Ryan liking getting most of the early work. In an interesting move, Buffy drafted both the Ravens and Steelers defenses. While a defense in RD6 isn't necessarily too early, two of them in two rounds makes little to no sense. Explanation? If Green is slow to start and Ochocino can't link up with Tom Brady, we foresee either Forte or Jackson to be shipped off for receiving help, assuming Foster stays healthy. Reggie Bush was drafted in the late rounds to provide some media pull as an ex of Kim Kardashian.
Grade: C

9. Fobsters
It's clear that the once much mocked Fobsters are now a perennial contender. With three playoff appearances in four years and last year's shocking run to the Super Bowl, semi-new owner Jimmy has turned this franchise around. After inheriting a team that fueled a 2-23-1 record over his first two seasons, Jimmy has been running a 0.500 (26-26) operation since. We gave Fobsters a "D" for last year's draft, which filled no holes in the gaping backfield. However, rookies Dez Bryant and Mike Williams both impressed and have upgraded the upside at receiver by a factor of ten. Veteran TE Jason Witten returns and he'll provide his usual 80+ catches and 1000 yards. With all those receivers in hand, the Fobsters made an off-season trade to turn franchise receiver Calvin Johnson into running back Michael Turner. While Johnson is a consensus top three receiver, getting a dependable RB was very important for this franchise. This gives the Fobsters their only legitimate top ten back since Deuce McAllister.

Now for 2011's draft. Frankly, we love it. Getting a top rookie running back at ninth overall is huge. Even if Mark Ingram is just one cog in the Saints' offensive juggernaut, he can't be any worse than Reggie Bush (originally drafted by the Fobsters and finally un-keepered this off-season). With his seventh rounder, Jimmy swept up Ingram's teammate, Pierre Thomas, for insurance. While the "real" Steve Smith is no longer a franchise player, he's worth a shot in case he gets traded. Heck, talented but trapped in Buffalo Lee Evans was moved to Baltimore recently, which will greatly enhance both his and Joe Flacco's value. The Fobsters took Evans and Flacco in RD4 and RD6 respectively, pre-trade. The season ending injury to Cardinals' rookie Ryan Williams opens the door for Beanie Wells, another slight boost. And if Tim Hightower can make some moves in Washington, Jimmy might finally have a decent ground game to complement Brady and his stable of pass catchers.
Grade: A-

10. Chunky Monkeys
It's clear that even if Ryan Mathews emerges this season, the trade for him that cost the Monkeys Chris Johnson was a lopsided one. Then again, the Monkeys won their second title without the services of Johnson, and are primed to do it again. Jamaal Charles may split time with a bigger back but his stats are out of this world. He's a top fantasy option and is only getting better. The less said of Mathews right now the better, and he represents a huge hole at the second RB position. With too many keeper worthy players around, Evan had to make some tough cuts, including Dwayne Bowe and Anquan Boldin. The good news is their last few trades maneuvers resulted in a whopping three second round picks for a defending champion. Very dangerous.

After nabbing Felix Jones in RD1, GM Evan snatched up TE Jermichael Finley, rookie Julio Jones, and WR Santana Moss. By the time other people were just gathering their rosters together, the Monkeys had their lineup and backups all filled out. This Falcons' fan may be a bit biased but WR Julio Jones is going to be tremendous. With the recent swap of Roddy White for Calvin Johnson, Evan won't even have to worry about inter-team conflict in the future. While we're not entirely sold on Brandon Marshall, Monkeys' management is convinced he's headed for a bounce back year. Old hand Santana Moss will likely fit into the third receiver slot with Johnson and Marshall to start the season. Unless Mr. Irrelevant, Robert Meachem, wants a crack at the starting gig.

We're still very concerned about that hole next to Jamal Charles. Felix Jones is a pass catching threat, but not the sort of runner Evan generally likes. LaDainian Tomlison is returning though, and it would be quite amusing if he has another season that is better than his Chargers' heir apparent. QB Philip Rivers is the centerpiece of the whole Monkeys' operation, and backup Matt Stafford will likely never see the field. To be honest, we're surprised at the lack of promise in the Monkeys' draft, outside of the two Jones'. The three second rounders seem slightly wasted? All Evan was hunting for to defend his championship seems to be solid performers who may or may not be up to the challenge.
Grade: B-

The Eagle Has Landed

2011-08-16T22:12:00.000-07:00

In a move that was largely seen as inevitable, Michael Vick 2.0 is now a Philadelphia Phreak. The Tiiite End Jammers boasted two top QBs, with Vick and Tony Romo on board, but that was one too many. After an injury plagued season from Romo last year, the Jammers knew that Vick had more trade value.

After a round of whirlwind discussions, it was agreed that Ping would send RB Maurice Jones-Drew and a 2011 RD5 pick for Michael Vick and an accompanying RD5 pick. With Vick now in the fold, the Philly Phreaks boast the entire Eagles' aerial attack, as WRs DeSean Jackson and Jeremy Maclin are also keepers. The lone running back will be sophomore speedster Jahvid Best, which means the Phreaks are in the market for more durable options entering the draft.

As for the Tiiite End Jammers, they now have Tony Romo back at the helm. With three solid running backs behind him -- Jones-Drew, Rashard Mendenhall, Ryan Grant -- Romo should have a balanced attack. The official Jammers' press release about the trade was a bit harsh on Vick, but the PR department quickly stepped in to say nice things about the ex-dog killer afterwards. The original statement was this: "After using up all of Vick's mojo last season, the Jammers have kicked Vick to the curb and made it Romo's team once again!"

Analysts love the trade for both sides. Having two top QBs in a ten team league was useless for Lei, so getting a franchise running back was a great return. As for the Phreaks, if Vick can stay even seventy five percent healthy, he's got the potential to be the best fantasy player in the land. As part of the Phreaks' recent resurgence, we really like this move.

2011 Keepers

2011-08-11T22:09:00.000-07:00

The Rules 2.0

2011-08-10T17:49:00.000-07:00

General League Rules

New rules are implemented upon a majority vote from the league.
Trades can be overturned by three-fourths of the Rules Committee (Jon, Evan, Eric, Ping). If it is a tie, then the trade goes through.

Roster Limits

8 active starters, 6 reserves, 1 IR slot
Any player can be placed on the IR slot, but once there, they no longer allowed to be active for the rest of the season. The player in the IR slot can be released.
Five players may be designated as keepers each year

Starting Lineup

1 QB
1 RB
3 WR/TE
1 RB/WR/TE
1 K
1 Def

Illegal rosters score zero points in standings
Lineup deadline: Five minutes before gametime for each player

Scoring

See scoring rules spreadsheet
Tiebreaker: None, leave regular season matchups as ties

Transactions, Waivers, and Trades

Add/Drop Deadline: Five minutes before each week's first game
Add/Drop Limit: None, allow owners to do unlimited add/drops

Waivers run: Wed, Thu, Fri, Sat
Waivers period: 1 day
Waivers Order Resets: Never, set at beginning of season according to draft order
All players not on a roster are picked up via the waivers process for the first waiver run of each week
All players not cut by a team are then free agents, and available for unlimited adding after the first waiver wire run of the week

Trade Deadline: December 1st

Playoffs & Toilet Bowl

Playoffs start: Week 14
First Round Bye: Division winners receive a first round bye
Playoff seeding tiebreakers will be determined by: (1) Head to Head Record, (2) Points Scored, (3) Division Record
In the event that a playoff game ends in a tie, the deadlock will be broken using (1) Most touchdowns scored by a starting roster, (2) Most points scored by a starting defense
The winner of the Toilet Bowl receives the #1 overall pick in RD1, while the loser of the Toilet Bowl receives #2 overall pick in RD1, before they revert to their original positons for the rest of the draft. Toilet Bowl seedings and details.

Drafting

Yearly draft order is calculated according to reverse regular season standings (same tie-breakers as playoff format)
The two Super Bowl contestants draft second-to-last and last
The draft is worst to first, non-snake

Moving Forward

2011-08-09T17:02:00.000-07:00

New Rules for 2011

Decimalization of scores. Each rushing/receiving yard is now 0.1 points, and each passing yard is 0.05 points.
Illegal rosters score zero points for the team and in the standings.
Waivers will now be run 4x a week: Wed, Thu, Fri, Sat. Players cut by a team will be on waivers for one day. In addition, the waiver order will be set at the beginning of the season (in draft order) and then never reset. Picking up a player will drop a team to the bottom of the queue. Free agents will still be picked up free for all, after the first day of waivers run each week. (Detail)

Things voted on but not passed

Using CBS vs ESPN: Denied on a 5-5 tie.

Mega-Roddy!

2011-08-03T23:25:00.000-07:00

Well, that sure didn't take long. A few hours after newly minted Dirty Bird receiver, Calvin Johnson, passed his physical, word came that a deal had been struck which would send Johnson to the Monkeys for Roddy White.

The deal was officially struck this afternoon as the commissioner's office received the final details of the trade. Calvin Johnson plus the Dirty Bird's 2nd pick in the 2011 draft for Roddy White and the Monkey's 3rd pick in the 2011 draft.

Strangely enough, this was the first trade between the two storied franchises. "As active as both Jon (GM of the Dirty Birds) and I have been, for some reason, we never found a deal that we both liked. This deal was one we both liked," said GM Evan of the Chunky Monkeys.

According to the Monkey GM, "We've always loved Calvin Johnson and his big play ability. Roddy was a terrific contributor to our Super Bowl team last year and I thank him for all his hard work for us last year. However, getting Megatron was a unique opportunity to get a little younger, taller and in our opinion, better. We spoke with Philip Rivers prior to getting the deal done and he is very excited about working with Calvin. We think this could be a great pair for years."

According to ESPN Senior Analyst, Adam Shefter, "Great deal all around that just works for both teams. Roddy White gets to play for the home town Dirty Birds and the Monkeys continue to re-tool as they prepare to defend their title. Both are Tier 1A receivers so it was simply a matter of the two teams finding a better fit in the other receiver. The 2nd pick for the Monkeys could be significant as well as they continue to stock pile picks. Good move for both teams."

Turner to GMs: "Not Again!"

2011-08-02T20:37:00.000-07:00

For the third time in a little over eighteen months, Falcons running back Michael Turner is on the move. "Shit, I'm not buying no more. Just renting. No, subletting probably. My family is hurting man, we're hurting!" After a bounce back season in 2010, in which Turner churned up 1300+ yards and 12 TDs, Dirty Birds management has decided to swap him for WR Calvin Johnson, the finale in a long rumored deal. In fact, this exact deal may have been attempted last year before the playoffs, but the trade deadline nixed that plan.

The Fobsters' Calvin Johnson feels similarly slighted. After contributing heavily to the franchise's first Super Bowl appearance last post-season, the homegrown receiver thought a big raise was in order. However, management felt differently after Johnson scored only seven points in the championship game. "We thought as an evil Transformer, Megatron would have given us more than four receptions and fifty yards. We were disappointed in his performance," said GM Jimmy.

The number one overall draft pick in 2007, Calvin Johnson has emerged as an elite threat despite working with inferior quarterbacks throughout his career. (That same draft was the one that netted Dirty Birds RB Adrian Peterson, one pick after Johnson) After looking over his roster, GM Jimmy decided that the lack of a ground game was too glaring a hole on his roster. Armed with young guns Santonio Holmes, Mike Williams, and Dez Bryant on the roster, Johnson was deemed a luxury. Turner will be tasked with giving the Fobsters a presence on the ground after their lackluster backfield by committee last season.

As for the team Megatron arrives to, they'll now be a high flying squad. With Larry Fitzgerald, Miles Austin, and Johnson aboard, the Dirty Birds have decided to take to the air. While they still boast consensus number one running back Adrian Peterson, GM Jon felt that a shakeup was in order. The new second RB will be Knowshon Moreno, who has flashed some promise but has yet to achieve the productivity Turner has. Rumors are that other deals are in the works, as the Dirty Birds work to acquire a Falcon for their roster. With this blockbuster, the 2011 season is officially off to a fast start!

Iguana Strikes Back

2011-08-01T10:06:00.000-07:00

Historical Record
If we're measuring success by Super Bowl appearances, the Fat Jubas have been one of the most successful franchises in CTDB history. They advanced to the championship round four times -- 2002, 2003, 2005, 2006 -- and won a Super Bowl on their third visit. They also racked up an impressive eight playoff showings and two divisional titles. Those exploits make them second only to Gang Green's achievements in the Spunky Misunderstood Geniuses division.

The Jubas have been savvily guide by Eric and are usually championship contenders and have had their share of big wins. Their 2002-2003 seasons were almost identical. Second place finishes in the division despite losing records, and then a joy filled romp to the Super Bowl.

Strangely, for a team with so much success, they only show up in the league record books once: for a second place showing on Most Points Allowed Season, in 2002. And the Fatties have an overall losing record of 74-80-2 (.481) for the past decade, which is surprising. Some would say that the early weakness of the SMG division gave the then Flaming Shrapnel a leg up, but those people might be just jealous of their postseason success.

Their divisonal rivalry with Gang Green is very lopsided, as they've lost 17 of 23 matchups. They have picked on the Fobsters and Phreaks franchise over the years though, compiling a 29-14 record against those two. Although of late the Jubas have had a disconcerting tendency to be upset in the playoffs by the Fobsters. Perhaps the best measure of the Jubas is to compare them with Battle Angel, who are similar in overall record, head to head matchups, and one championship each. Overall the Jubas have enjoyed a lot of unexpected playoff success but also some heartaches. They're looking to steady the ship heading into our eleventh year and are poised to do it quite well.

Core Roster
The Flaming Shrapnel stumbled out of the gates in 2001 but always had quite the roster of talented players on board. Ahman Green was the franchise running back and he was backed up by Anthony Thomas, Jamal Lewis (IR early), Garrison Hearst, and a young Shaun Alexander -- still stuck behind Ricky Watters. This sort of crowded backfield would come to define GM Eric's strategy for his early years. A few weeks into that first season, Green was shipped out for Eddie George, who had a very poor year. However, by 2002, George, Anthony Thomas, and Jamal Lewis would prove to be a capable running attack. Two years later, that potpourri would include be two younger backs, Domanick Davis and Chris Brown, who never quite sustained their early promise. Other RBs the grace the roster during this time included William Green, Tiki Barber, Warrick Dunn, Onterrio Smith, Thomas Jones, Tyrone Wheatley, and Cedric Benson before he was relevant.

It wasn't until 2005 that the Jubas found another franchise runner via trade: Shaun Alexander. A record setting season for Alexander led to a Super Bowl trophy for Eric. The next year, GM Eric got another franchise runner via trade, Frank Gore. By the time Alexander was ingloriously released in 2007, Ryan Grant and Michael Turner were ready for their star turns. After a disastrous 2009 season, GM Eric acquired Chris Johnson in a possible steal. With Gore still on board, and Darren McFadden finally cashing in on his promise, the Jubas enter the new decade with a fantastic three headed monster. Keep in mind, all those franchise making trades for RB came at the expense of Chunky Monkeys.

As the Jubas' backfield was turbulent and flipped over for many years, the receiving corps always had star power and production. Led off by Terrell Owens and Eric Moulds, the team had a nice tradition of a nice 1-2 punch and then a veteran in the third receiver role. Players like Cris Carter, Rod Smith, Jimmy Smith, Laveranues Coles, and Lee Evans had a good season or two before fading on. GM Eric also moved quickly on the waiver wire. Anquan Boldin exploded on the scene in 2003 as a rookie and GM Eric was right there to scoop him up. Another fantastic free agent came in 2006, right as the gap for a TO sized receiver was needed. Marques Colston was undrafted and ended up becoming an important cog in the Jubas' success for the next five years.

Young versions of Dwayne Bowe, Sidney Rice, and Brandon Marshall were also drafted or picked up by Eric. The scouting department for receivers is clearly underpaid at the Jubas' headquarters. Recently, they have started a tight end fascination too, as 2009-10 featured the likes of Dallas Clark, Tony Gonzalez, and Vernon Davis logging plenty of minutes. I believe all three even started a game in last season for the Jubas.

Let's talk about that quarterback position. The inaugural season featured Elvis Grbac and Alex Van Pelt. Trent Green steadied the position before Aaron Brooks came in for one outstanding year. The year after that, a trade for Steve McNair saved the 2003 season, and then Marc Bulger stepped onto the scene, leading Fat Jubas to a championship and steadying the position for a nice stretch. Eric caught Derek Anderson's one great year and then nabbed Kurt Warner for his two year resurgence. Last year, the Jubas traded for the steadiest QB in the game, Peyton Manning. However, with the great track record of grabbing QBs during their career peaks, Manning could just be a luxury.

After winning a divisional title last year, the Jubas have their strongest team on paper ever. Peyton Manning, Chris Johnson, Frank Gore, Darren McFadden, Marques Colston, Vincent Jackson, and Vernon Davis. There's a wealth of talent here and the Jubas are ready to challenge Gang Green for SMG accolades.

Season Breakdowns
2010: 8-5; Won a division title, started off 7-1, but upset by Fobsters in the divisional finals
2009: 4-8-1; Lost three in a row to end the season, sliding to last place in the division
2008: 7-6; Second in the division, mid-season five game winning streak, lost in the divisional round to eventual champion Battle Angels
2007: 6-7; Second in division, started off 2-6, upset in the first round by Fobsters
2006: 9-4; Won division, started off 5-2, advanced to the Super Bowl but lost to Chunky Monkeys
2005: 8-5; Second in the division, advanced to the Super Bowl, won their first championship versus Chunky Monkeys
2004: 7-6; Snuck into the playoffs, lost by three points in the first round to Battle Angels
2003: 6-7; Second in the division, advanced to the Super Bowl before losing to the Tiiite End Jammers
2002: 6-7; Second in the division, advanced to the Super Bowl before losing to the Dirty Birds
2001: 3-10; A lowly last place finish in the division

Stats (full)
Highest Avg Game Score, Season: 124.15 (2009)
Most Points Scored, Game: 161 (2009)
Least Points Scored, Game: 50 (2003)
Best Margin of Victory, Game: 93 (2008)
Worst Margin of Defeat, Game: -79 (2005)
Longest Winning Streak, Season: 9 (2006)
Longest Losing Streak, Season: 5 (2002)

2011 Draft Order

2011-07-31T20:15:00.000-07:00

Battle Angel (3-10) *Toilet Bowl winner
Dirty Birds (4-9) *Toilet Bowl loser
Tiiite End Jammers (5-8)
Gang Green (6-7)
Ante Up (7-6)
Philadelphia Phreaks (7-5-1)
Fat Jubas (8-5)
Buffy (8-4-1)
Fobsters (7-6) *Super Bowl runner up
Chunky Monkeys (9-4) *Super Bowl winner

All Time League and H2H Records: 2011

2011-07-30T20:16:00.000-07:00

Another Ring for LT

2010-12-30T05:55:00.000-08:00

The Monkeys still got it! After a fast start on Sunday, the Monkeys blew the doors open early and ran over the unsuspecting Fobsters for their second franchise championship victory with a 123-77 stomping.

As analysts predicted, the Monkeys needed a fast start and fast they started. Within the first hour, Jamaal Charles scored 2 quick receiving touchdowns while Dwayne Bowe converted a short throw into a 75 yard touchdown run. The 3 early touchdowns proved to be just the shot the Monkeys needed as they cruised to their second title in 5 years.

This victory was all about timing. After a season with very mixed results including weekly lineup changes, injuries to Mathews and Marshall (the key cogs to the Chris Johnson trade), the Monkeys got hot at the right time. Sealing up their 4th straight win, the Monkeys found a dominant defense in the Pats which scored 18 and 14 points in the playoffs and a resurgent Brandon Marshall (who posted consecutive 10+ catch and 100+ yard days.

The rest of the team was business as usual. Led by Charles who had 120 total yards to go with 2 touchdowns (24 points) and Bowe (152 yards and a touchdown good for 25 points), the Monkeys saw a balanced attack.

The Monkeys even got some help from the Fobsters. The Fobsters drew first blood on Saturday with Jason Witten, David Buehler and Cowboys D. Capitalizing on a tasty matchup against the Cards, GM Jimmy signed and started Buehler (K) and the Cowboys D. It worked – kind of. Witten had another solid day with 14 pts and Buehler chipped in with 9 points. However, the much vaunted Cowboys DST laid a major egg. They gave up 27 points and 270 yards to the Cards yielding 1 fantasy point. On Sunday, it was basically the Tom Brady (26 points) and Mike Williams (17 points) show. No one else showed up. Megatron was held to 7 points and last minute sub, Brian Westbrook, gained only 5 points. The Fobsters finished the afternoon with a thud as Mike Tolbert, who’s been solid all year, fumbled and got knocked out of the game. He finished with -2.

All this meant a gift-wrapped victory for the Monkeys who put up their 6th 100+ scoring day of the year and their 4th straight win to cap off a rather un-Monkey like season. “To get this in my first year as the starting QB of the Monkeys is awesome,” said Philip Rivers who finished with a relatively quiet 16 points. “We have some unbelievable talent and my gut tells me that we’re going to be around for awhile. Roddy, Brandon and Dwayne are terrific receivers and I am fortunate to be throwing to them.”

“Winning never gets old,” said GM Evan. “It’s been an interesting year but I believe that our core roster is as strong as ever. We lost great players in Peyton Manning and Chris Johnson but I truly believe that our team is as strong as ever. Philip had an MVP year – even Peyton-like. Jamaal really stepped up this year. Without CJ and with the injuries to Ryan Mathews, he truly was the team MVP. He was a rock each week and is now an elite player in this league. I also loved what I saw out of Roddy White, Brandon Marshall and Dwayne Bowe. Those are elite receivers and paired with Philip, we have an outstanding roster. One thing that needs to be mentioned was the importance of retaining LaDainian. He was so important in our locker room providing guidance and leadership. If anything, this victory was for LaDainian. We were able to lock up our first championship after his legendary 2006 season but this was one is equally sweet. This one is for LaDainian.”

Despite the question marks coming into the season, the Monkeys are well set up for another dominant decade. The roster is brimming with young talent and management will have some tough decisions in regards the keeper list. However, for now, the Monkeys can savor the moment.

“We got another ring and that’s the best present we could ask for,” said team captain LaDainian Tomlinson. “I’m grateful to have the chance to play on this team and this was an extremely fun group of guys to be around. I’ve had some great teammates – Peyton, Shaun Alexander and even Larry Johnson but to be honest, these guys could be even better. The plays are different but the victory is the same.”

“The Monkeys are gearing up for another Monkey-type run,” said ESPN Analyst Adam Shefter. “This team has all the markings of a team just about to peak. A bonafide elite QB in Philip Rivers, two up-and coming running backs in Charles and Mathews and a top flight receiver core led by Roddy White, Brandon Marshall, Dwayne Bowe and Anquan Boldin. This team will certainly return the best passing offense in the league and will undoubtedly see tremendous gains in their ground game next year. This will be a scary team next year. Bank on that.”

Super Bowl X

2010-12-26T21:20:00.000-08:00

With their least dominant roster in franchise history, the Chunky Monkeys had the easiest championship run in recent memory. Facing no real hurdles heading into the playoffs, the Monkeys dismantled both of their playoff foes by scoring 120+ the last two weeks. Oh what a difference a(nother) ring makes. The discussion for "Best Team in CTDB History" is now re-opened with Evan's second Super Bowl win -- their first win was four years ago -- and he's going to be able to make a great case for number one. In fact, after last year's title collapse, when we named the underdog Gang Green "Team of the Decade," we may have to take that moniker back. But before we talk about history, let's take a look at the championship game that was dubbed "The Big Bowl of China," but played out more like "The Little Fight of Taiwan."

Drawing first blood, Jimmy's tenacious Fobsters had three Cowboys combine for 24 points Saturday afternoon (TE Jason Witten, K David Buehler, Cowboys D). Before the game, our sideline reporter talked to Coach Jimmy, who was considering starting a fourth Cowboy, RB Tashard Choice, before he opted to spread his roster around and inserted veteran Niners' RB, Brian Westbrook. That turned out to be a wise move, as Choice only accrued three points.

The Fobsters had high hopes of a gigantic upset heading into the week, as they matched up decently well with the Monkeys, despite lacking a slight edge at every position. Their biggest worry pre-matchup was the Monkeys' Philip Rivers, who would be facing a soft Bengals defense. Rivers had only five points heading into his fourth quarter, and that should have been great news for Jimmy. Instead, they were already so far in the hole that having Rivers eventually settle into 16 points for the week was just another kick to the groin. Behind Jamaal Charles and Dwayne Bowe's 25 and 24 points (plus Brandon Marshall's 10 receptions and 102 yards), Evan had already sewn up the championship by early evening. Ironically, it was the hometown Chargers' poor defense that let the two Chiefs run wild, and gave Evan the huge edge. So despite a sub-par performance by Rivers, this game was all but decided by 4pm Sunday.

What really hurt Jimmy was his own roster, which really needed to step up in this time of need. Tom Brady did his part with three passing touchdowns. Jason Witten and Mike Williams both had pretty good games, but Calvin Johnson was nowhere to be found, with only four receptions and fifty or so yards. The real culprit here though was the running game. Steady Mike Tolbert, a fan favorite, stumbled to negative two points, and Westbrook only had five points himself, which meant the entire backfield for Fobsters produced three points. Ouch.

Pre-Super Bowl X, Coach Evan made a very interesting choice, sliding in free agent pickup RB Rashad Jennings into the lineup -- while players like Anquan Boldin, LaDainian Tomlinson, Danny Woodhead, Ryan Mathews, and Jacob Tamme lurked on the bench. Known to take chances, Evan was swinging for the fences here. While Jennings wasn't spectacular this weekend, we think the great karma built up from being bold enough to make the call gave the Monkeys a spiritual push. We actually can't even post the final score yet as the Monkeys have All Pro Roddy White still to go on Monday Night, and he'll surely pad the Monkeys' total even more in a celebratory victory lap. Right now it's 113-77 but that score will definitely go up after White's MNF performance.

We want to give playoff MVP to the Patriots defense actually, as they've scored 20-14-18 points in successive weeks for Evan. However, the real MVP contenders for the Monkeys' dream championship run are really the steady depth that everyone provided. For Evan's two playoff weeks, Jamaal Charles had 21 and 25 points, Rivers accrued 31 and 16, and Brandon Marshall had 19 and 15 points. Add in Roddy White and the Patriots defense, and five out of eight starters were stellar.

By winning their last five games of the season, the Chunky Monkeys re-established themselves as the team to beat, and with a roster reloaded with potential stars, they could now turn the corner to being the team that never chokes, and waltzes away with the wins. So now, let the discussion about "Team of the Decade" begin!

Edit: Final score 124-77

Flip the Bird

2010-12-23T20:40:00.000-08:00

And there we have it, our first ever Toilet Bowl Champion. Congratulations are in order for the Battle Angels. After a precipitous fall from the top, the Angel’s redeemed themselves with a timely 88-64 win over Jon’s Dirty Birds to secure the first pick never year.

I guess the final score of 88-64 was fitting for the championship game for the 2010 toilet bowl. It was ugly. We saw 3 donuts (Adrian Peterson, Malcolm Floyd and Terrell Owens) and even a -4 from Jon’s defense (Bucs DST). Even worse, the Birds needed 25 points from Adrian Peterson on Monday night to take the cup but instead, saw Peterson get de-activated just minutes prior to the game. Oh, the ironies of this great game. Despite a bagel and a negative, the Birds found themselves still in position to win. Despite leaving 3 24+ scorers on the bench (Matt Ryan, Austin Collie and Mario Manningham), the Birds were still in it much of the weekend.

However, most importantly, the very same owner that caused a firestorm with Flaccogate (who interestingly enough was the starting quarterback of this game) saw his best player get inactivated on Monday night to complete the most bizarre loss in recent history. GM Jon was, in a word, “Flaccoed” by the fantasy gods. On the flip side, Vu’s Angels was saved by great games from Brees (29 pts) and Benson (21 pts). Despite 0s from Floyd and TO (in game injury), the Angels put up just enough mustard.

Look ahead:
The top pick couldn’t come at a better time. With a floundering line up, Vu’s core keepers are Brees, AJ and Jennings. Floyd is maybe? Maybe Original Steve Smith? Potentially DeAngelo can come back or maybe even Benson? Whatever Vu decides, new blood is needed and the top pick will sure help. As for the Birds, they are set. Peterson, Turner, Larry Fitz, Austin and even Moreno are pretty much locks as keepers. Matt Ryan had a great season and could be in play as well. The rich get richer perhaps? Or perhaps just dirtier.

The Big Bowl of China

2010-12-20T14:48:00.000-08:00

Chunky Monkeys (9-4) versus Fobsters (7-6)
So the matchup is set, after two not so close games, it's Evan versus Jimmy. Uh oh, we've seen this storyline before. High powered Chunky Monkeys enters into the Super Bowl against a lowly third seed. Denizens of Monkeyland prepare a parade rout, cue up the dancing girls, and call the confetti company. Then the collapse. I guess the mayor of Monkeyland can just use last year's celebration plans because they sure didn't get to use them after being upended in last year's Super Bowl. If you just look at the stats, CM seems to have had another ho-hum winning year. But we can't discount the efforts they've made to recover from a pretty disastrous off-season trade and still make the Super Bowl.

This is the Fobsters first Super Bowl appearance and if they can win, they'd be like the 2009-10 Saints, coming from the depths of loserdom to make an improbabe franchise turnaround. Pundits are in a bit of disbelief that this is the team they'll be watching in the last game of the season, but true fans in Taiwan and China knew all along that they would be rooting for a Fobster team in the Super Bowl -- some day. The Fobs have an uphill battle though, as they are clearly the David in this matchup, even if the Goliath isn't as dominant as usual. Or should we say it's tiny Taiwan versus vast China?

QB: How about this for a marquee matchup? In his first year with the Monkeys franchise, Philip Rivers has elevated his game to another level and powered his new crew to the Super Bowl. GM Evan must be delighted not to have chokester Peyton Manning calling the shots, as he often disappeared in the biggest fantasy moments. Rivers is a stud who doesn't feel pressure, and threw up thirty one points to lead the Monkeys to the big game. This week he goes against a week Bengals pass defense. Fireworks!

This would all be very intimidating if Tom Brady wasn't patrolling Jimmy's sideline. Brady has been the best fantasy player down the stretch, and the only thing that can slow him down is inclement weather. Jimmy must be displeased to see a late December showdown in snowy Buffalo for a championship game, but if anyone can crank out a huge game under possibly terrible conditions, it's Tom Terrific. Edge: Even

RB: This is the shoddiest collection of running backs we've ever seen in the championship game. Oh how times have changed when having two strong RBs was the key to playoff success. In theory, Jamaal Charles has been outstandin and he's been hot enough to drive Evan's successful trip to the Super Bowl. In reality though, a guy who scores 22-14-5-21 in the last few weeks isn't that excitinig. If he has a big Super Bowl though, this reviewer will eat his words. Evan's other three RBs, Ryan Mathews, Pierre Thomas, and the corpse of LaDainian Tomlinson, all scored five points or less last week. There's a strong case to be made here for a run and shoot lineup.

The good/bad news is that the Fobsters' franchise features even worse RBs. Mike Tolbert for MVP anyone? While we have much respect for Tolbert, he's a ten point performer and that's about it. Jimmy could roll the dice with Tashard Choice or Brian Westbrook, but both can be slightly risky plays. Westbrook gets the most carries of the three, but is arguably the most volatile choice. Will Jimmy run and shoot or go two backs? This could be a key decision. Edge: Chunky Monkeys

WR: When there's no running game, there's some balls flying through the air. Am I right? Evan boasts Roddy White, Brandon Marshall, and Dwayne Bowe. Roddy is one of the best in the business, and Marshall finally had a breakout game (just in time), while Bowe escaped quadruple coverage to get some points on the board. While it's hard to say that Evan's WRs will all have a great game this weekend, two out of three should be plenty. Anquan Boldin also lurks on this roster, and there are rumors he'll get into the lineup despite scoring zero points last weekend.

On the other side of the ball, Jimmy has Calvin Johnson, Jason Witten, Mike Williams, and Santonio Holmes. Don't sleep on Witten, as he's had two straight double 20+ outings and mid-teens otherwise. He's been a star performer. Calvin is the Megatron and even if he's working with a third string QB in Detroit, he'll get his numbers. The big question here is Mike Williams, who tends to boom or bust every other week. He boomed last week with 18 points so is he doomed to disappear during the championship game? Jimmy better hope not. Edge: Even

K/Def: When it gets down to such high stakes, selecting the right kicker or defense can be huge. Evan's Patriots Defense has twelve big points last weekend and helped him seal the win. Jimmy's Packers D had a measly one point. That's a big disparity. While the two kickers, Matt Bryant and Nate Kaeding, are mostly evenly matched, the performance of the defenses could be huge. For now we go with the Patriots having a big edge as they are facing off against a terrible Buffalo Bills offense. Edge: Chunky Monkeys

Mandarin Mojo: Having attended many a Chinese school class with both of these guys, I can safely say that Jimmy's Chinese outpaces Evan's by a broad continent (he also has less morals about cheating on tests, ahem). This is our first Chinese School Bowl, and it's kind of exciting. After years of participating in fantasy leagues, often together, Jimmy and Evan find themselves face to face, just like on the playground on a Saturday morning.

If this were just a regular season game, whatever, the gods and ancestors could care less. But high stakes are here for both teams. A record tying second Super Bowl win for Evan. An unbelievable playoff run capped by a championship for Jimmy. Whose proud parents will be able to take the podium after this weekend and declare their child the victor? Which thirty year old-ish child will be berated and beaten for being inferior and not good enough (ever)? Edge: Fobsters

Ante Up Rivered

2010-12-19T21:19:00.000-08:00

And then were two. After a tight battle through much of the day between the Monkeys and a surging Ante Up, Roddy White gave the Monkeys much needed breathing room before the Pats Defense closed out a terrific Round 2 in the IDK conference with a 118-104 victory.

Despite team captain, Aaron Rodgers, being knocked out with a concussion - the scrappy Ante Up team battled all day long. Back up, Josh Freeman, put up a very respectable 20 points while runningback Ray Rice energized the team with a ridiculous 37 point day with 150+ yards rushing, 80 yards receiving on 5 catches to go along with 2 tds. That was buttressed by a Kenny Bitt re-emergence with 6 catches for nearly 130 yards. Ante Up finished with 104 points – enough to win probably most games.

But the Monkeys got hot at the right time. Philip Rivers led the way with an ultra efficient 31 points on 270+ yards and 3 TDs (all to Vincent Jackson) on Thursday night against the Niners. His supporting cast was more than adequate. Brandon Marshall finally had a coming out part of sorts by putting up 100 yards on 11 catches to go with a touch (19 yards). Jamaal Charles was electric again with 126 yards (80 of which came on one play only to be caught from behind at the 5 – typical) and a touch to finish with 21 points. Lastly, Roddy White ended a 4 week scoring drought with 15 points. Kaeding (10 pts) and the Pats D (14 pts) were seemingly shrewd roster moves by GM Evan as they proved to be more than the difference. At least enough to over come Rice’s monster day.

In his post game interview, Philip Rivers told the media that “We just played well in all phases. We didn’t have huge explosive games like Ray Rice had but our guys played extremely well. I can't say enough about Jamaal Charles. He shares the rock but is averaging over 6 yards per carry and is the 3rd in the league this year in rushing. We also have a bunch of receivers capable of absolutely lighting it up. They take turns and you saw that this week with BMarsh and Roddy. I'll also definitely be looking for Quan next week. We have tons of talent and we are certainly looking forward to showing them off in the Super Bowl.”

In a quick post game analysis, ESPN Analyst, Adam Shefter noted that “The Monkeys clearly have the superior roster in the upcoming Championship weekend. While you can never discount a team that has Tom Brady, the Monkeys have an extremely deep team this year. While this has become Philip Rivers’ team, you need to watch out for Jamaal Charles who has quickly become an elite back in this league. Charles has 1,961 yards in his last 17 games on only 297 carries. That is 6.6 yards per carry. As for the passing, the formula for the Monkeys is easy. 2-3 20+ point performers (this week was Marshall and Rivers) and you’ll see the 120+ points we’re used to seeing the Monkeys put up each week. Next week will be a tremendous matchup.”

SMG Playoffs - Rd 2

2010-12-17T11:19:00.000-08:00

Fat Jubas (8-5) vs Fobsters (7-6)
This is quite the matchup. A win here would put the Fobsters in their first ever Super Bowl, and would be a real achivement after fighting uphill ever since Jimmy entered the league in 2005. They've gotten steadily better and are now actual contenders for the crown, despite constant battles with an empty backfield. For the Fat Jubas, another Super Bowl appearance, especially if it was versus the Monkeys, would be special because they've were pretty terrible just one year ago. They had the first overall pick in this year's draft, and going from worst to a division is certainly a sign of an epic turnaround.

Over the past four weeks, the Jubas have scored 97-52-127-69 (not including last week's possibly record breaking 175 points on a bye). They've been like that all season, boom or bust, with not much consistency. Their opponent is quite consistent, as the Fobsters rarely have terrible outings, with 94-89-105-117 over their last four games. We predict a blow out, but which way?

QB: It's Tom Brady versus Peyton Manning! Tonight on MNF! Okay, it's not Monday night, but Brady versus Manning is always an event. Normally we'd call this a wash but Tom Fantastic hasn't had an interception in seven games and has ripped off 30-40-41-41 in the last five weeks. While Manning is no slouch, he's been just average mostly, with a mid-twenties average. Edge: Fobsters

RB: Mike Tolbert hasn't been a great fantasy back but he's been big when it's mattered. For a guy who rarely gets large yardage numbers, Tolbert still squeaks into the double digits most weeks by gathering up short distance touchdowns. He'll be the Fobsters' only RB this week, as there are real dependable backs behind him. On the other side of the ball, Fat Jubas have Chris Johnson and Darren McFadden. Both are capable of huge games at any given time, but they also have been a bit susceptible to some real low weeks. CJ went for twenty seven last weekend (on a bye) but had only 7-1-14-17 before that. Hardly premiere numbers. McFadden could be the key here, as he's getting hot again. 39 and 17 points after slumping to 9 and 3 points previously. Compared to Jimmy's one back express, Eric's team is gonna run circles around the competition. Edge: Fat Jubas

WR/TE: Jason Witten was the big hero of last weekend for the Fobsters with 21 pts, and he'll be solid once again for certain. Jimmy can't afford a back to back weak game from Calvin Johnson and it probably won't happen. Going with four WRs will increase the chances that at least Santonio Holmes and/or Mike Williams put up some positive numbers.

For Eric, Marques Colston has been outstanding. He's been in double digits since WK7, and is coming off of 18-13-13-27 points. He's Optimus Prime to Johnson's Megatron. And to match up with Witten, Eric has Vernon Davis, who's had 15-20 points recently, and should continue to be productive. Starting two TEs, Eric won't need Tony Gonzalez to score more than a handful of points, which he's very capable of doing. Despite the four on three advantage, we kind of lean toward Eric's side of things. Edge: Fat Jubas

K/Def: Jubas' Shayne Graham is slightly better than the Fobsters' Matt Bryant, but who cares? The real difference maker here will be Pittsburgh Defense, which has the ability to go huge some games. They could rip apart a Jets' offense that has struggled recently, and we're almost guaranteeing that the Fobsters' Packers Defense is going to get shellacked by the New England offense. They're not gonna hold back Brady in any which way. Edge: Fat Jubas

IDK Playoffs - Rd 2

2010-12-17T10:49:00.000-08:00

Chunky Monkeys (9-4) vs Ante Up (7-6)
Here we go guys, all that stands between another Super Bowl appearance for Chunky Monkeys is the resurgent Ante Up. These teams have met in the playoffs before, but a long time ago. Remember when dinosaurs roamed the Earth? Okay not quite that long. But back in 2005, Jae's team had the best record in the league but were upset by the Monkeys in this exact same round. Two years prior to that, Jae did the upsetting of the Monkeys in the first round (before losing to the Tiiite End Jammers the following week). So there's a bit of history here and this rubber match could be explosive.

The Monkeys have scored 90-100-98-118 in recent weeks (although they only posted 66 points during their bye) while Ante Up has been at 92-130-105-128 over their last four. This could be real interesting and we're betting the team that clears 100+ gets the win.

QB: It's Philip Rivers versus Josh Freeman. Rivers is the better player in fantasy and real life, but there's no discounting that Freeman does have some magic. Will that translate to stats though? Ante Up would be happy be with a high teens effort from Freeman, as that would at least replace some of Aaron Rodgers lost production, as Jae decided to not roll the dice post concussion. What would have been a high powered matchup won't be quite as exciting anymore. Edge: Chunky Monkeys

RB: Ante Up is rolling with an explosive backfield. Ray Rice has been a bit up and down but as a second back he'll outclass his competition. And LeSean McCoy had a huge week last time out, and even with limited rushing attempts he gets so many combined yards that he's a fantasy star. The Monkeys used to be defined by a dominant running back corps but this year they've had some issues there. The Ryan Mathews trade didn't work out in its first year, but Evan is going with the rookie for the playoffs anyway. Mathews scored last week but his high all season has been twelve points. Jamaal Charles sometimes splits carries with Thomas Jones, but for the most part he's been a dependable source of high teens production. Charles won't score TDs very often, but he can pile up the yards. Still, there's no real comparison here. Edge: Ante Up

WR/TE: The good news for the Monkeys is that that have a very strong receiving core. Roddy White, Dwayne Bowe, Anquan Boldin, and Brandon Marshall are some big time names. Roddy and Bowe are the top two WRs this year, and Boldin has been top twenty. The slight concern here is that Bowe is in a serious slump after a double bagel, and White and Boldin have been erratic recently. Marshall could slide into the lineup but he's been a single digit scorer for the last six weeks -- eight if you include two games missed due to injury.

For Ante Up, it's Reggie Wayne and a bunch of hopefuls. Wayne has had three hundred yard games in his last four games and is almost guaranteed to be near twenty points. Behind him is some real problem areas though. Derrick Mason has actaully been very good the last few weeks, but he's as likely to toss up five points as twenty. Third receiver had 43 points off 225 yards and 3 TDs in WK7 but he's been injured recently and only collected three points last week. The other option is Mike Sims-Walker but he's been absolutely pathetic. Edge: Chunky Monkeys

K/Def: Normally kickers aren't a big deal but Jae boasts David Akers, who has scored in double digits his last seven games. It's likely he'll beat out Ante Up's last two WRs in scoring. The Monkeys do have Nate Kaeding, but he'll still lag a tad behind Akers.

Interestingly, Jae is electing to sit Ravens Def, as he realizes they are in semi-free fall. He's going with a lackluster defense, the Raiders, who have scored a combined fourteen points the past three weeks, and threw up a negative five in WK11. Dangerous call. Evan is going to battle with the red hot Patriots Defense, who are are hitting their stride with thirteen and twenty points in their last few weeks, and face a Rodgers-less Green Bay team. Edge: Chunky Monkeys based on defense

Toilet Bowl Finals

2010-12-16T01:19:00.000-08:00

And here we go - the first inaugural toilet bowl championships. Our first ever contenders bring with them plenty of star power as well. Jon's Dirty Birds are starting Adrian Peterson, Michael Turner, Larry Fitzgerald and Miles Austin. It'll be interesting to see who GM Jon decides to start between Joe Flacco and Matty Ice but both QBs have been more than serviceable all year. As for Vu's Angels, it'll be the passing. Led by Drew Brees, Andre Johnson, Greg Jennings and TO ... expect to see bombs galore from the Angels this weekend. Here's a look at the matchups.:

QB. Angels all the way. While Ryan and Flacco are two of the best young QBs right now, Brees is an established superstar. Brees does play a tough Baltimore defense this week but remember, the Texans lit them up last week. Advantage: Angels.

RB. Here you have Adrian Peterson and Michael Turner vs. Cedric Benson and Keiland Williams. This could be Manny Pacquiao vs Wee Man in a boxing fight. We all know Wee Man will try their best but honestly, this fight will last less than 3 seconds. AP and Turner are two legit stars who can put up 300 yards and 4 tds in their sleep. Cedric Benson is a serviceable starter but far from a star. I'm still trying to figure out who Williams is. Advantage: Birds.

WRs. This is where it gets interesting. You basically have the whole pro bowl team going on in this match up. You have AJ, Jennings and TO facing off against Larry Fitz, Miles Austin and Lance Moore. With the exception of Moore, all of these featured WRs are legit stars. This is a legit faceoff of studs. However, the best player here is AJ and that should be enough to tip the scales for the Angels. Advantage: Angels.

K/DST. Jon's Buccaneers and Neil Rackers to Vu's Browns and Mason Crosby. Rewind 5 years and you'd never see the Bucs against the Browns (mostly because the Browns wouldn't have been owned by any team 5 years ago). The Browns play a 2-win Bungles while the surging Bucs face off against the Megatron led Lions. The kickers should be fairly even though its important to note that Crosby will likely be playing in some "inclement" weather in NE this weekend. Advantage: Birds

Playoffs Round 1 Results

2010-12-15T02:05:00.000-08:00

Fobsters (94) defeats Philadelphia Phreaks (85)
After a tearful testimonial to Donovan McNabb last weekend, it turned out that the former face of the franchise could have led the Phreaks to victory. Ping's QB of choice, Kyle Orton, put up a whopping goose egg behind three interceptions, and that negated DeSean Jackson's stellar 29 point game. Even with a strong contribution from Maurice Jones-Drew (18 pts), the Phreaks were torpedoed by the lower seeded Fobsters and ended their season of resurgence with three straight losses.

Jimmy's team surged to a victory behind Tom Brady (30 pts), Jason Witten (21 pts), and Mike Tolbert (13 pts). There was even a bit of extra juice on the bench, as Brian Westbrook could have added a bit of cushion to the win. With a strong upset, the Fobsters are going to need a bit more gas to topple the Fat Jubas, who scored a whopping 175 points while on bye. Would that have been a record?

Ante Up (92) defeats Buffy (56)
So remember last week when we predicted a huge scoring game? Well, let's just say the Metrodome caved in and it probably fell on both of these team's offenses. To be fair, Ante Up put up a decent number, and had some fine performances all around -- excepting Aaron Rodgers' two points and Kenny Britt's three. Derrick Mason came up huge with 22 points, and he added the extra muscle to allow Jae to knock out the higher seeded Buffy.

Poor Roger, who had such high hopes entering this season, and was given top billing as the team to beat heading into the post-season. His team was ultimately doomed by a defense that scored -7 points, and a big fat zero from Antonio Gates -- who was a game time decision and left in the lineup, sadly. Troubled by QB play all season, starter Carson Palmer disappointed with eight little piddly points, and despite mid-teen performances from the rest of the roster, Buffy slumped to a weak defeat. They just came out flat I guess, except for Deion Branch, who had 25 points from the bench. Even if Branch had substituted for Gates, Buffy would have gone down whiffing. Better luck next year?

2010 Toilet Bowl – Round 1 Recap

2010-12-15T01:42:00.000-08:00

Dirty Birds wins squeaker over Tiiite End Jammers
A furious comeback that just made it. It was supposed to be much easier. The Birds were down by 32 but they had Joe Flacco, Adrian Peterson, Mario Manningham and Neil Rackers going into Monday night. After the Giants/Vikings game was moved to Monday after the Metrodome lost their faceoff with Minnesotan snow, the Birds had their big guns play on an unusual Monday doubleheader. However, Manningham left early in the game with an injury and scored a big donut for Jon’s Birds. More importantly, Adrian Peterson found no running room all night (it should be noted that this was the day Brett Favre’s streak of 297 starts came to an end). Peterson managed only 26 rushing yards for 2 points. Ouch.

Fortunately, Flacco pulled out a solid 23 points but most importantly, Neil Rackers came through in the clutch with 2 FGs to finish with 8 points. Just enough scoring to squeak by Lei’s Jammers with a final score of 85-84. For Lei, it was a weekend of missed opportunities. Despite another heroic effort from Mike Vick (28 pts), the Jammers got double bageled by Crabtree and Knox. Furthermore, they had Romo, Harvin and Ryan Grant sitting on the injury due to injury. Just one point, that’s all it took. Birds advance, Jammers take a seat (again).

The Ugly Toilet Bowl
Wow. Team Gang Green defined suckage. A full slate of starters – check. No bizarre mid-game injuries-check. Team full of suckage – double check. Between 8 starters, Gang Green assembled 59 points. That’s a 7.35 points / starter. Wow. Five players including surprise stars, Stevie Johnson, Brandon Lloyd and potential comeback star Sidney Rice, had less than 10 points.

On the flip side, the Angels did their thing. Brees scored 25, AJ scored 30 and the rest of the roster did crap. Sounds about right. Final count Angels 86 to Gang Green’s 59. It was, as usual, clutch performances that catapulted the Angels to the first championship round of the first ever CTDB toilet bowl.

Quick Preview – Angels vs. Birds.
This is a pretty good match up with a bunch of superstars in the house. We’re talking about Adrian Peterson, Andre Johnson, Michael Turner, Drew Brees, Miles Austin and Larry Fitzgerald. Its basically the Pro-Bowl. Will be a great match up for first pick – get your popcorn ready!

Still McFabulous

2010-12-09T17:06:00.000-08:00

“This is where it all began for me, and this is where it will end.” With those words, Philadelphia Phreaks stalwart Donovan McNabb (the teams top draft choice a decade ago and the longest-tenured player on any team in the league) ushered in the Phreaks’ 2010 playoff season. “I will be forever grateful to Ping and to the Phreaks organization for having faith in me on day one, and for showing tremendous amounts of loyalty and character in sticking with me through all of the ups and downs of the past ten years. It’s been an incredible run, and whatever happens in the offseason, I’m a Phreak. For life.”

As the Phreaks prepare for what is an unlikely playoff run, they do so with many unusual faces on the roster. None more so, perhaps, than expected signal caller Kyle Orton, who took over for McNabb halfway through the 2010 season and who has been instrumental in the team’s success. Nobody on the Phreaks, however, will question that the heart and soul of the team, and its leader, is McNabb, even as he watches from the sidelines. “I’ve been here a while and Don’s always been the guy, the heart of the team,” said rushing leader Maurice Jones-Drew. “He’s still a talented player and to watch him accept his role while still supporting the team and giving everything he has in any way that he can – man, that’s inspirational stuff. They might make a movie about this someday – ‘The Don’ or something like that, maybe bring in Denzel.” Hollywood dreams aside, there is little question that the Phreaks need McNabb – even as a sideline influence – on their side for their upcoming playoff run.

“The Phreaks without Donovan is like a sailboat without its keel,” said Phreaks GM Ping, “We owe so much of who we are and where we are to him – much more than most will ever know. I’m just grateful to have had the opportunity to manage a team with Donovan at the helm for over a decade – if only others could be so blessed. Donovan embodied, in every way, what a football player and human being should be, and he will surely find his way into the Hall of Fame.”

Barring injury, it is likely that McNabb has already started his last game as a Phreak. Team sources indicate that the Phreaks will likely bring McNabb back next season, and that the team sees a coaching role with the Phreaks in McNabb’s near future.

In other news, it has been reported that Phreaks wide receivers Desean Jackson and Mike Wallace have reached out to Chris Johnson and to Jamaica’s Usain Bolt to gauge interest in forming a 4x100 relay team for the 2012 Olympics. Jackson, Wallace, and Johnson are widely considered the three fastest players in the league and with Bolt would be an intriguing favorite at the 2012 games. What really remains to be seen is how well Jackson and Wallace will use that speed on the gridiron come Sunday. Stay tuned and get your popcorn ready.

SMG Playoffs - Rd 1

2010-12-08T00:04:00.000-08:00

Both of these teams must be kicking themselves for a weak WK13. With a win, either of them could have sewn up a much needed bye. This entire division has been parity quintupled. Seriously, only fifty points separated the lowest scoring team in this division (Gang Green, 1201 pts) from the highest (Fat Jubas, 1248 pts). That's barely four points a game most weeks. As expected then, strength of schedule played a huge part in who made the playoffs and who didn't.

Gang Green and Battle Angels combined for only nine wins, and their strength of schedule was a bit tougher than the rest of their division mates. Actually, Vu's team faced an uphill battle all the way as they faced the toughest schedule in the league, which worked out to 22.5 points more per opponent than Evan, who had the softest schedule. With four teams in playoff contention till the end, it wasn't until the last Sunday of the regular season that Eric leapfrogged Ping and Jimmy for a division title.

Philadelphia Phreaks (7-5-1) vs Fobsters (7-6)
Ping's lovable losers haven't been in the playoffs since 2006, but it feels like so much longer doesn't it? With only two previous playoff appearances in franchise history, the Phreaks had a break out season and are looking poised to be contenders for years to come behind a semi-Eagle powered attack.

Quarterback Kyle Orton has been a model of consistency all season long, and fended off the likes of Donovan McNabb, Jay Cutler, and Kevin Kolb (who never actually played a game for Phreaks this season). Orton has been the sixth best QB in the land, and hadn't scored less than fourteen points until an aberrant dud last weekend. He's been an underrated superstar this season and a contender for fantasy MVP.

Orton has a fine group of receivers to target, as DeSean Jackson, Jeremy Maclin, and Mike Wallace have proven to be great complements for each other. All three average about ten points a game and strictly speaking, Maclin and Wallace have been better than Jackson, but Jackson has had some injuries this year and is still a premier big play threat. The passing game has slowed a bit the past two weeks but Orton and his crew should pick it right back up for the playoffs. The quarterback that has the biggest effect on this team is actually not even on the roster. Michael Vick powers the real life Eagles and as long as he plays, Maclin and Jackson are prime time players.

Rumors swirled that star running back Maurice Jones-Drew was offered up for another Eagle, but so far no bites on that front. MJD was supposed to have injury issues heading into the season but he squashed those with a strong second half of the season. In fact, Jones-Drew is picking his game up at the exact right time with 25-24-13-18 in recent weeks. His running mate will probably be BenJarvis Green-Ellis, who was mostly an afterthought most of the year, until he started scoring touchdowns and getting better with each game the last four weeks. He's clearly displaced early season sensation Jahvid Best, who put up half of his points for the Phreaks in his first two weeks, and then promptly disappeared.

Aside from a weak WK13 performance, the Phreaks have scored 108-129-95-95 in previous weeks. They started the season off a bit unruly but powered through late and really picked up offensive steam and consistency. With a balanced roster all around, Ping's team has no weaknesses and if the receiving corps remains steady, the RBs will definitely do their part, and the Phreaks could be looking at their very first playoff win ever!

GM Jimmy must be proud that he's completely turned his franchise around. The moribund Skool franchise he took over was the absolute pits but since their epic 0-13 season in 2006, the Fobsters have made the playoffs in three of the following four years. They've lost to eventual champion Gang Green both of their recent trips to the post-season, so they're delighted to have eliminated the Greenies from playoff contention with a huge comeback win a few weeks ago, which gave them the tie-breaker and eventually sealed Greg's fate.

QB Tom Brady has been making his case for fantasy MVP as he's used three forty point games in four weeks to power himself to second best player in the league. After some ups and downs during the early part of the season, Brady and the Patriots are starting to flash their record breaking form again. For the Fobsters' opponents, that could be very frightening.

Brady's main target all season has been Calvin Johnson, who has justified his high ranking after a lackluster season last year by settling in and being explosive for a whole season. There's no question that Megatron has found his way back to elite status. Losing rookie sensation Dez Bryant for the playoff run is going to hurt though. Bryant had been having some really promising games before his injury. Now the receiving slack will have to be picked up by another rookie, Tampa Bay's Mike Williams, who's leading all first year receivers in yards and touchdowns. Jimmy also has Santonio Holmes, who has been very steady since his early season suspension, and has five straight double digit games.

The big hole on this team (as always) has been at running back. Bruising Mike Tolbert has been a fantastic find for the Fobsters, as he's stolen all the carries away from much ballyhooed youngster Ryan Mathews. Tolbert has been a rock with his tough running and touchdown production. Joseph Addai was looking like a steady presence until he went down in WK7 and hasn't returned. Addai was never a great option in the backfield but he had been doing great. With absolutely nothing behind Tolbert, GM Jimmy has been forced to go with Brian Westbrook, who could have some value as the back to replace Frank Gore. The Fobsters could also select to go with Tashard Choice, who had 100 yards last week but is mostly a complete unknown, or just run and shoot with Jason Witten as the fourth receiver.

The Fobsters are peaking at the right time. They haven't had a terrible game since WK6 and have had three century games in their past four outings. Then again, go look at the Phreaks past few games. No shabbiness there either. While we said that the other division had the game of the week, these two teams are also evenly matched and we see some huge fireworks on display over here too. In fact, we might like the stakes here a bit more, as we have Ping fighting for his first post-season win, which would be cause for a celebration indeed in Philadelphia.

Regular Season Finale Power Rankings

2010-12-07T14:58:00.000-08:00

The 2010 regular season is now in the wraps and what a season it was (final standings here). Along with some familiar and expected names (hello Adrian Peterson and CJ2K), we have some new risers (Aaron Rodgers and Philip Rivers), and as always we have some new out-of-left-field superstars (Peyton Hillis, Brandon Lloyd, Steve Johnson, Dwayne Bowe).

Before we march into the playoffs, here’s a look back at the year that was.

10. Tiiite End Jammers (5-8)

Technically, the Jammers didn’t have the worst record but they had the worst luck. Injury is the one word to sum up the Jammers season. Before the season even was under way, the Jammers announced that they were placing 2010 first pick, Ryan Grant, on IR for an ankle injury. Weeks later, Jammers starting QB, Tony Romo was effectively knocked out for the season with a broken collarbone. As for the rest, you had a lot of “potential” but not a lot of production. Talented youngsters such as Beanie Wells, Percy Harvin, and Michael Crabtree were up-and-down at best. While Harvin and Crabtree have shown flashes of brilliance (Harvin will finish in the top 30 receivers ranking), the rest of the young talent Beanie Wells (44 pts), Pierre Garcon (82 pts) and Crabtree (97 pts) were unreliable and largely unproductive.

However, there are positive signs. The Jammers may have found the QB of their forseeable future in a revitalized Mike Vick (6th best QB). Rashard Mendenhall is a stalwart and will be a cornerstone. There’s talent on this team but GM Lei Pan will need to find the right combination for next year.

9. Battle Angels (3-10)

The Angels had the worst record of the year. What? These are the same Angels that are 2 years removed from a Superbowl ring and had a dominant 2009 (best regular season record, most points scored but upset in the divisional series against the eventual champions – Gang Green). Its hard to figure out what happened as the Angels returned the core of their dominant past rosters. We’re talking about a team with Drew Brees, Andre Johnson, Greg Jennings, and DeAngelo Williams! It was a mix of injuries, a bad run game but a whole lot of bad luck. Drew Brees was Drew Brees with another ~300 pt season finishing as a top 5 QB. The Angels had another dominant season receiving season. Greg Jennings, TO, and AJ all finished in the top 8 receivers.

What the Angels missed was their run game. DeAngelo Williams just had a poor start, held back by a terrible offense in the Panthers. After just 7 weeks of ~5 pt/week production, Williams was finally placed on IR in late October. Angels’ lead back, Cedric Benson, had a decent season (10 pts/game) but was barely a top 20 back. The biggest factor was defense. While the Angels scored over 100 pts a contest, opponents nearly averaged 115 pts a week. Just look at Week 13 – the Angels ground out 125 points …. Only to be beat yet again by Ante Up (with 130). That’s just bad luck. The Angels will be back next year.

8. Dirty Birds (5-8)

Another super team with terrible results. Look at the line up: All Day, Burner Turner, Larry Fitz, and Miles Austin. Not to mention the rotating tandem of Matty Ice and Joe Unflappable Flacco. There is some big time talent on this team. AP turned in another MVP performance with an 20+ pt/week average. Turner also had a very workmanlike season and turned over 1,000 yards with 8 TDs – good for 14+ pts/week. On the receiving side, the Birds had a bit of a down year. Miles Austin finished as the 15th best receiver averaging just less than 13 pts/game. Fitzgerald was slightly worse with 135 pts through 13 weeks. The 3rd WR was a constant rotation (due to injury between Finley, Collie and Mario Manningham).

On the QB side, 2010 draft picks, Ryan and Flacco probably outperformed. Matty Ice was the 8th best QB while Joe Flacco was the 11th. If there’s a chance one of the QBs are kept, its probably Ryan. Mr. Ice showed remarkable progress and averaged nearly 23 pts/game. We have no idea how the Dirty Birds sucked so much. They only scored over 100 points 3 weeks all year. On the flip side, they scored under 80 in 8 times! Many of those times were true suckage with 3 weeks under 80 points.

7. Fobsters (7-6)

Fobsters are continuing to build momentum. With 2 playoff appearances in the last 3 years, the Fobsters are about to make their 3rd in 4 years. Led by Tom Terrific and Megatron, the Fobsters have been the beneficiaries of a bit of luck this year. Opponents averaged under 100 pts a game against them this year (Fobsters were actually the 3rd lowest scoring team this year). While there’s some steady performers here, the roster gets a little suspect outside of Brady. Players like Mike Tolbert, Santonio Holmes, and Mike Williams have been key performers but are far from stars at this point. It’ll be interesting to see the decisions Jimmy makes this off-season.

6. Gang Green (6-7)

Last year’s champion is this year’s mediocrity. That’s football. Despite a near .500 record, Gang Green actually had a pretty bad year. The 4th lowest scoring team in the league, Green finished the season 1 game under .500. A far cry from the championship season last year. However, this isn’t new. Greg relies more on steady no-name performers instead of star divas. This year, Green found some absolute goldmines (despite an inability capitalize). Steven Johnson came out of no where to finish as a top 10 receiver. Even more shockingly, Brandon Lloyd (yes, the same Brandon Lloyd that came into the league in 2002) finished as a top 3 WR averaging over 17 pts a game. Wow.

There’s more, Greg picked up some white RB named Peyton Hillis in September. Hillis went on to put up 962 yards with a ridiculous 11 TDs. This also does not include 50 catches for 430+ yards and ANOTHER 2 TDs. Damn. Hillis finished with 1 point less than Adrian Peterson. WOW. All three including Johnson, Lloyd and Hillis were FA pick ups. Despite this, Green had a bad year. Mostly because of the terrible years put up by Randy Moss and Shonn Greene. There’s talent here with multiple keeper possibilities in Hillis, Johnson, Lloyd, Hakeem Nicks, Sidney Rice and maybe even Greene. We think this team is much better next year than entering this year (hard to believe).

5. Chunky Monkeys (9-4)

Its weird to see the Monkeys in this slot. The same Monkeys that were so dominant in the first decade, the same Monkeys that, despite a very up-and-down season, enters this year’s playoffs with a 1st week bye. However, in many ways, these are not the same Monkeys. Gone are Peyton Manning and Chris Johnson. In are Philip Rivers, Jamaal Charles, Dwayne Bowe, Roddy White and Brandon Marshall. The Monkeys no longer sport the best runningback tandem in the league (think back to prior Monkey duos including CJ2K & Jamaal Charles, LT and Larry Johnson, LT and Shaun Alexander) and instead often rely on the run n’ gun led by Jamaal Charles. Charles, despite a strong yardage season, is really a time-share player.

Where the Monkeys have excelled this year has been their passing. Rivers is a top 3 quarterback and Dwayne Bowe/Roddy White are the top 2 receivers this year combining for over 2,000 yards and 21 tds. The Monkeys have a lot of potential talent in Marshall, Mathews (or else viewed as the largest bust this year) and Boldin but have so far haven’t been able to put it together consistently. We’ll see how they fare this year in the playoffs.

4. Fat Jubas (8-5)

At the start of the season, the Jubas looked like the Monkeys (Peyton and CJ2K) and played like the new Monkeys (7-1 regular season start). However, after only suffering their first loss in week 7, the Jubas suffered an unexplainable 4 game skid before finally righting the ship in the last game of the regular season against the Birds. During that losing streak, excluding a bad beat by Ante-Up (128-127), the Jubas averaged a measly 66 points. The issues are becoming increasingly clear.

Gore is now out for the season along with Dallas Clark who was lost earlier this season. CJ2K has had 5 weeks under 10 points and is no where near the all-world player he was last year. Peyton has thrown more INTs than anyone can remember (8 in the last two games!). Jubas have some depth though with Darren McFadden now being rotated in (a potential top 5 runner alert!) and as always, a plethora of tight ends including Vernon Davis and Tony G. However, what matters is that the Jubas win when it counts. With a clutch final regular season win, the Jubas managed to secure a 1st round bye in the playoffs. We’ll see if they can live up to the hype in the playoffs.

3. Ante Up (7-6)

Its hard putting a .500 team as a top team but the numbers show that Ante Up has consistently been one of the best teams. Jae’s team is leading the league in scoring. Led by superstar QB, Aaron Rodgers (top fantasy player this year), and a rock solid run game rotating between LeSean McCoy, Ray Rice and Ahmad Bradshaw – all three are top 15 running backs. The lone weakness, the receivers. Outside of Reggie Wayne, there really is little to speak of. Britt, Amendola, Sims-Walker, Obomanu have been a rotating cast of nobodies. However, if A-Rod, McCoy and Rice keep putting up 80+, they might not have to.

2. Philadelphia Phreaks (7-5-1)

What? The Phreaks? What year are we in? The Phreaks have been in the playoffs in a whopping 2 times and finished under .500 in 5 of the past 6 years. However, this year is different. The Phreaks were one game away from a 1st round bye and was consistently one of the best teams in the SMG division. Led by unsung hero, Kyle Orton, the Phreaks have had a consistent passing attack bolstered by young talents in Jeremy Maclin, Mike Wallace and DeSean Jackson. They have combined for 20 TDs and over 2000 yards.

MJD continues to be the rock of this team and is having another MVP type season with 1,100 yards with nearly 300 yards receiving. The emergence of Orton has been a godsend for the Phreaks. This is one of the strangest team in Phreaks history (to begin with, Donovan McNabb is no longer the starting quarterback) and is reliant weekly fireworks from his receivers. However, those have come at a fairly regular clip. Expect to see fireworks in the playoffs.

1. Buffy (8-4-1)

One of the fastest starting teams this year, Buffy started 7-2-1 before a mid-season slip lost them their vise grip on the top seed. Like the Monkeys, Roger has totally rebuilt their team and essentially flipped their team as well. Moving from the greatest show on turf, Buffy is now one of the most feared running teams in the league. Led by league MVP, Arian Foster, the Buffy running attack also includes Steven Jackson and Matt Forte who are both top 15 backs.

The story here is Foster. A first year starter, Foster put up over 1,200 yards with 13 tds to go along with 50 catches for nearly 500 yards and another 2 TDs through the air. To put this in weekly terms, Foster averaged over 24 points a week. More than 4 points more than 2nd place, Adrian Peterson. Not bad for a virtual unknown. There’s some uncertainty at QB (currently manned by rookie Sam Bradford) and Antonio Gates’ health (torn plantar fasciitis and turf toe) but there’s no doubt, this is an elite team this year.

IDK Playoffs - Rd 1

2010-12-06T01:44:00.000-08:00

Two seasons in a row we haven't had a ten win regular season team. What that means is that no team has been dominant and that's been a good thing. This year's playoff hunt went down the very last week of the season, with both byes being up for grabs. Heading into Week 13, the Chunky Monkeys had the lead in the Inscrutable Drama Kings division while the Philadelphia Phreaks had a narrow edge over in the Spunky Misunderstood Geniuses division.

Interestingly, the two faced off during this last weekend, in a very crucial matchup. Both teams desperately needed the win; at stake was Ping's first division title and a guaranteed playoff bye for the winner. Despite a strong running game, the Phreaks couldn't muster much of an aerial offense and fell to the Monkeys' balanced attack, 90-70. What that meant was that the Chunky Monkeys found themselves in a familiar position of a #1 seed, while on the other side, another CTDB champion, the Fat Jubas, sneaked into a bye by beating the Dirty Birds 97-75.

With those two on easy street this coming weekend, let's take a look at what the playoff matchups will be for Week 14.

Buffy (8-4-1) vs Ante Up (7-6)
Two time champ Buffy haven't been in the playoffs since 2007 and have had some up and down times since then. Most of Buffy's resurgence this season can be attributed to one man: Arian Foster, the number one fantasy running back in the land. Foster started the season off with an eye opening 41 points and never really slowed down, finishing with three straight 20+ point games to head into the playoffs hot like fire. Buffy's other RB, Matt Forte also had a huge first week, but he faded a bit as mid-season approached before recovering nicely over the past few weeks. The running game is now Buffy's bread and butter, even as off-season acquisition Steven Jackson takes a seat behind Foster and Forte. Having a backup the caliber of Jackson can't be a bad thing.

The Buffy passing game has TE Antonio Gates, who was leading the league in touchdowns, and was vying for fantasy MVP-dom before missing essentially four games. He's back now and in full health so Roger can breathe a sigh of relief. Wes Welker had seemed to lose some of his mojo but over the past four weeks has ripped off double digit games and is becoming super dependable again. The big question is Chad Ochocinco, who has been barely serviceable, and could be relieved by Santana Moss, Deion Branch, or Steve Breaston.

There's also a bit of a QB controversy, as rookie Sam Bradford took a start over the mercurial Carson Palmer. The steadiest QB, David Garrard, isn't even on the roster anymore and it's going to be real interesting to see if he gets picked back up, or if Bradford and Palmer will be given the keys to the Buffy-mobile.

The good news is that Roger's team has been very consistent this year, dipping below eighty only three times all season, and has been near or over the century mark the last four weeks. They're going to be a tough out and are serious contenders for their third championship.

This marks Ante Up's second straight year in the playoffs, a strong turnaround for a team that was coming off of back to back 4-9 seasons. While playoff success has been fleeting, it's a good sign that Jae has found his way back to fantasy relevance. Sophomore LeSean McCoy has been the fourth best back in fantasy this year, and has only one game with less than double digit scoring. He's a double threat and super legit. While the gap between Foster and McCoy is large overall (over sixty points), McCoy has been stellar the past four weeks and has only scored four fewer points than Foster during that span. As long as Vick remains the Eagles' QB, McCoy is a franchise player.

The other starting running back is Ray Rice, who hasn't quite lived up to his preseason hype, but has been intermittently explosive nonetheless. Rice may not be a number one back, but as a number two he's just fine. Then again, raise your hand if you knew that Ahmad Bradshaw was a top ten back this year? With the Giants having found their run game again of late, Bradshaw is picking up steam heading into the fantasy playoffs. There's no doubting that Bradshaw can be an impact player, and is sneaky dangerous. Who will fill the second RB spot next to McCoy? We told you Buffy had a strong running game, but Ante Up has the advantage here.

Jae's not so secret weapon is Aaron Rodgers, the best fantasy player this year, who's also coming off of four weeks with scores of 36-41-32-35. The problem is, outside of Reggie Wayne, there's no receivers for Rodgers to throw to. The second best receiver here is arguably Danny Amendola, but Nate Washington, Jabar Gaffney, Lance Moore, and someone named Ben Obomanu have been starting the past few weeks. Receiver is a big Achilles' Heel on this team and maybe Jae can move LeGarrette Blount, Jonathan Stewart, or even Bradshaw for some last minute WR help. Heaven knows the injured Mike Sims-Walker and Kenny Britt aren't the answer. Can a team win the Super Bowl with this sorry group of pass catchers? Jae probably wishes he could play three or four RBs.

Barring a 78 point dip in WK10, Ante Up has scored 133-128-93-130 points heading into the playoffs. In fact, they used that 130 point outburst to topple Battle Angel by five points, in a wild last game of the season matchup. Can Ante Up beat Buffy this week? Well it looks like it'll be a high scoring game either way because their first matchup this year in WK4 was decided by five points as Buffy toppled Ante Up 135-130. Then three weeks later their rematch was decided by two points, as Buffy once again nipped Ante Up in a scorcher, 107-105. We're guessing this game gets decided by three points, with both teams going all out and flexing their offensive muscles. Looking at the final regular season stats, these two teams almost had identical PF and PA numbers, meaning we're in for the game of the week!

Final Standings 2010

2010-12-06T00:51:00.000-08:00

Early Playoffs Look

2010-11-30T14:10:00.000-08:00

Inscrutable Drama Kings Division

MONKEYS. The Monkeys, despite a very up and down regular season, have locked up a slot for the playoffs. Partially helped by inexplicably poor season by Jon’s Dirty Birds and Lei’s Jammers, the Monkeys are now focused on taking the top spot this year. The Monkeys can ensure a much needed first week bye with either a win OR a loss by Buffy. The Monkeys have a tough matchup this week in their first matchup of the year against SMG leading Phreaks.

BUFFY. Buffy is on a 2 game slide but similar to the Monkeys, have benefitted from strange bifurcation in the division. Leading the division for much of the year, Buffy just gave up the top seed to the Monkeys last week after suffering their second straight loss. To overtake the top seed, Buffy needs to win against a fighting Fobster team but also need some help from the Phreaks.

ANTE UP. Jae’s Ante up team is locked into the 3rd slot. The team will be playing the Angels who have already been knocked out of contention. This match up could get worse ratings than MNF’s Cardinals and 49ers.

DIRTY BIRDS. A lineup with AP, Burner Turner, Larry Fitz, and Austin Miles somehow has a 4-8 record. We have no idea if it was terrible management, poor timing but with a talented roster, the Birds severely underperformed. Jon will need to begin the off-season tuning this week – it’ll be a long off season for the Dirtier than normal Birds.

JAMMERS. Another tough season for Lei’s team. Critical injuries to Ryan Grant (1st pick) and starting QB Tony Romo really hurt this team. Also, young talent including Beanie Wells, Percy Harvin, Michael Crabtree never really panned out (on a consistent basis). One redeeming light was the Jammers’ find in Mike Vick. Certainly a keeper for next year, the Jammers have a lot of potential pieces – they just need to find the right ones.

Spunky Misunderstood Geniuses Division

PHREAKS. Holy moly. The Phreaks are in the playoffs. Not only are theyin the playoffs, they have a very good shot at locking up the 1st slot in the SMG division. They need either a win over the Monkeys (easier said than done) or losses by both Jubas and Fobsters. While the second scenario is a bit more difficult, the key here is that the Phreaks control their own destiny. Even more importantly, the Phreaks are back in the playoffs!

FOBSTERS. Playoffs in – though the Fobsters also have an outside chance of nabbing a 1st week bye. They need a win and losses by both the Phreaks and Jubas to overtake the top position. This has been a good year for the Fobsters. Strong performances by Tom Brady and Megatron have anchored a roster that features young guns like Santonio Holmes, Dez Bryant and the ridiculous bowling ball known as Mike Tolbert.

JUBAS. The Jubas need a win and they are in the playoffs. A loss and a Gang Green win could put their playoffs hope in jeopardy and would come down to points scored. The Jubas have been really hampered by injury with yesterday’s revelation that Frank Gore will now be out of the year. Dallas Clark is also out on IR. After a strong 7-1 start, the Jubas have suffered an epic 4 game slide that has put their playoff position at risk.

GREEN. A .500 team that has an outside chance of making the playoffs. At first look, this is a team that is surprising in the fact that it even has a chance at making the playoffs. Their best players are Peyton Hillis, Brandon Lloyd and Steve Johnson. 3 players that prior to this year were fantasy bagels. Fast forward to this year and you realize that these 3 are 3 of the top fantasy playmakers of 2010. And to that, Green is the one team that no one wants to see in the playoffs. Green needs a win this week against the Jammers but also needs some help from the Jubas or Fobsters. There’s definitely a pulse here and its growing stronger by the week!

ANGELS. Powerhouse to the outhouse. Such is football. From the glories of the 2008 championship and division championship appearance in 2009, the Angels seem to be a cellar dwelling team at this point. Despite the presence of Brees, Andre Johnson and Greg Jennings … the key weakness for Vu was the lack of a run game. They had none. Cedric Benson is the only real mainstay and the rest of the roster is occupied by Keiland Williams, Clinton Portis, and DeAngelo Williams (out for the year). Yikes.

Show Me How to MNF Comeback

2010-11-24T20:40:00.000-08:00

It's been a strange wild season, with old stars like Michael Vick rising from the ashes, the top running back (Arian Foster) was a 2010 second round draft pick, and Brandon Lloyd coming out of nowhere to be an impact player. Not to mention Terrell Owens and Hakeem Nicks, who have been top five WRs this year.

And take a look at those standings! Ping's Eagles are sitting pretty at 7-3-1 and two fighting weeks away from winning their first division title. Buffy is also 7-3-1 and with one more win will have the most regular season wins they've had since 2001. As we wind down the season, I wanted to take a look at the Week Ten games, which featured three super close games, and another high scoring matchup.

Chunky Monkeys (98) vs Dirty Birds (94)
Two teams headed in completely opposite directions, the Monkeys came roaring back Monday night and dashed the Birds' playoff hopes. Even though Big Ben had 42 points on the bench, GM Evan wasn't worried that Philip Rivers wouldn't take care of business. With four passing touchdowns, Rivers closed the twenty nine point gap, making up for the lackluster play by both Anquan Boldin and Brandon Marshall. Dwayne Bowe continues his late season surge, as he's been trending way up over the six weeks. For the Birds, a -2 showing by the Patriots defense sunk them, or maybe they just played the wrong receiver as Mario Manningham was weak with only three points, and every other reserve WR would have given the Birds the win.

Ante Up (128) vs Fat Jubas (127)
Jae's team has been clinging to a playoff spot all season and his up and down Ante Up really needed a win this week to push them toward the post-season. Playing Ahmad Bradshaw over LeSean McCoy cost him twenty points, but with Aaron Rodgers exploding for forty one, and a Ravens defense that notched two defensive TDs, Ante Up pulled out the one point victory. If Vernon Davis had scooped up a few more yards on his lone reception, the game could have gone the other way. Heading into the week, the Jubas were in an offensive slump, so this explosion was good to have despite the loss.

Fobsters (117) vs Gang Green (114)
Jimmy and Greg are battling each other for a playoff spot and this game had huge post-season implications. Greg's team has faced the second hardest schedule in the league, while Jimmy has had one of the easier ones. In WK4, the Fobsters punished the Greenies, 125-88, so Greg had even more reason to fire up his troops. Proving once again that he's the waiver wire maestro, Greg's team is led by Peyton Hillis, Brandon Lloyd, and Hakeem Nicks. However, it was another pickup, Buffalo WR Steve Johnson, who cranked out three touchdowns on the way to thirty five points, helping the Greenies to a big lead heading into Monday night.

Of course, Jimmy has been pretty good at cobbling his team together this year too, as his roster has been ripped apart by injuries and uselessness, especially at the RB postion. This team also features three TEs, who are all below average options. But oh the magic of Santonio Holmes, who paced the the Fobsters heading into Monday with his 27 points. While it seemed like too tall a task for a comeback Monday night with just RB Mike Tolbert playing, the feisty Charger had his best game of the season (22 pts) and came up with a huge win in the race of a playoff spot.

All these fireworks and it was Vu's Battle Angels who had the best score of the week, 134 points, behind Drew Brees and Greg Jennings, who combined for seventy five. His opponent, Roger, had 107 points but wasn't quite within striking distance throughout.

Game of the Week (9)

2010-11-05T04:47:00.000-07:00

This week’s game of the week is a matchup between both division leaders, Fat Jubas of the Spunk Misunderstood Geniuses ad Buffy of the Inscrutable Drama Kings. This week 9 matchup has been long anticipated as both Fat Jubas and Buffy have been leading their respective divisions for most of the season. It is also a battle between the top two scoring teams in the league.

Coming off of a loss to the DIRTeByRDeeZ, in which Buffy GM Roger attributed it to poor management decisions, he is looking to bounce back with a road victory at Fat Jubas. “The loss this past week at home was my fault, the players did what they needed to do, but it was my mistake in utilizing a defense that was unfamiliar with the Buffy scheme,” acknowledged the Buffy GM. “You know, every week, I put my guys in a position to win, and I go ahead and make a stupid stupid mistake. At least my name isn’t Brad Childress.”

While lineups have not been finalized, it is anticipated that the matchups will be as follows:

QBs: Carson Palmer vs. Peyton Manning, edge Fat Jubas
RBs: Arian Foster and Matt Forte vs. Darren McFadden and Justin Forsett, edge Buffy
WRs/TEs: Wes Welker, Chad Ochocinco, Antonio Gates vs. Marques Colston, Aaron Hernandez, Tony Gonzalez, edge Even

Even with Chris Johnson, Frank Gore, and Vernon Davis out this week, the powerhouse that is Fat Jubas look like they are in pretty good shape to protect their house. GM Buffy will have to rely on his coach’s rating (3rd overall to the Jubas 5th). This could very well be a preview of this year’s CTDB Super Bowl. Stayed tuned.

Power Rankings

2010-10-16T15:40:00.000-07:00

10. Tiiite End Jammers (1-4)

The rebuilding Jammers have probably hit an all-time low. Besides Tony Romo and Rashard Mendenhall, the rest of the Jammer lineup is constantly shuffled with the likes of Beanie Wells, Mark Clayton, Michael Crabtree, and Percy Harvin. We like the talent here … all the names above have the supreme talent but just need to find consistencies. As they say, no where to go but up. I think we’ll see a much better Jammers team in future but just not this year.

9. Battle Angels (1-4)

Its been quite a stumble for Vu’s Angels. After a historic 2008 championship run, Vu’s hit a bit of a stumbling block coming out of the gates this season. Drew Brees hasn’t quite been himself this year. Despite a solid 7 td performance, Brees has only been the 6th best QB this year. Significantly behind Manning, Rivers and the surprising Kyle Orton. Even more importantly, Vu’s receiver core which has been rated the best in the league for a few years have been underperforming. Andre Johnson and Greg Jennings have both been averaging less than 10 points per game. Malcolm Floyd has only been slightly better but extremely less consistent. Perhaps its time for Vu to start the infamous TO (53 points). Vu’s running backs have also been extremely mediocre – surprising given the expected leadership of DeAngelo Williams. Shockingly Williams has been averaging just over 8 points per contest. If you boil it all down, the whole team has been underperforming. Vu will have to find the right mix soon to right the ship.

8. DirteByrdeez (2-3)

The Dirty Birds are officially a mess. Coming off of Flaccogate and no Kickergate, the league’s most active coach has been shuttling players in and out of his lineup trying desperately to find the right combination. Adrian Peterson and Miles Austin continue to be solid but the Birds have been trying to find the right quarterback between Flacco and Mattie Ryan. The Birds have also been bitten by the injury bug with Larry Fitz, Michael Turner and now Michael Vick. Despite acquiring to the best performing waiver picks this year in Austin Collie and Vick, the Birds have yet to find the right combination for wins. The Birds scrapped out an ugly win versus the Monkeys in Week 5 but can they continue this streak? Averaging just over 80 points a week … yikes.

7. Gang Green (2-3)

Another stumbling Superbowl champ. The 2009 champ has really stumbled in the past 3 weeks with 3 consecutive losses. Its hard to diagnose the problem here but its clear that expected stars are just not performing. Shonn Greene has taken a clear back seat to LT, Randy Moss has literally fallen off the cliff. To put it in perspective, Moss has less points than Louis Murphy. In their place, we see new starters in Peyton HIllis and Brandon Lloyd. While there definitely is talent on the roster … there are many moving parts.

6. Ante Up (2-3)

Jae has a great quarterback (Aaron Rodgers) and a great running game anchored by Ahmad Bradshaw and Ray Rice. However, it’s the receiving core that’s been a big let down. Outside of Reggie Wayne, the receivers have been very inconsistent. First round pick, Mike Sims-Walker, has done literally nothing in two games. Specializing in bagels, MSW is now on the cusp of being released by Ante Up management. This is probably going to be another 5-8-ish season for Ante Up.

5. Fobsters (3-2)

Despite a second place record, the Fobsters lineup is still in a state of disarray. Outside of Tom Brady and Megatron, the Fobster lineup is mixed with 3 TEs and the likes of Mike Tolbert and Caddy Williams (who was somehow a keeper this year). There is young talent on this team – led by Dez Bryant, Mike Williams and Santonio Holmes but they will need time to develop.

4. Philadelphia Phreaks (2-2-1)

An injection of home-run hitting Jahvid Best seemed like a much deserved moved for the Phreaks. After years of 1st round running back busts, the speedy best burst onto the scene with some incredible runs. Reminiscent of Barry Sanders, Best was on a path of rookie stardom until the dreaded “turf toe monster” apparently caught up. While still a sure keeper, the Phreaks need to find a way to keep their star players healthy. The talent is there with MJD, Jahvid and Eagles WR combo of Desean Jackson and Jeremy Maclin. Even mid-season free agent pick-up, Kyle Orton, is currently a top 5 QB. Lost in all of this is that Phreaks are on their way to their first playoffs in a long time! (fingers crossed)

3. Chunky Monkeys (3-2)

The regular season champs have lost a bit of their charm. After pulling out 3 straight wins, the Monkeys stumbled in week 5 … and stumbled hard. Still trying to find the right running combo, the Monkeys have become a passing team. The combo of Rowdy Roddy, Quan, and B-Marsh are quickly proving to be the best WR set in the land. The key now is to find the right running combo between Jamaal Charles (continued time share), Ryan Mathews (ankle problems) and LT (can he continue taking carries away from Shonn Greene). The Monkeys are likely playoff contenders but can they win it all?

2. Buffy (3-1-1)

The IDK division may have a new leader – team Buffy. A win over division rival, the Monkeys, this week, will go a long way in cementing their place as the new division leader. New found superstars in Arian Foster and Matt Forte have been unexpected surprises. Even Steven Jackson has found less playing time because of their successes. On the flip side, the passing game is anchored by the truly incomparable Antonio Gates. Gates is the top pass catcher in the land and combined with Arian Foster, the two are the two top scoring non-QB position players so far this year. Wow.

1. Jubas (5-0)

The new Chunky Monkeys. Undefeated. Except for a minor stumble last week, the Jubas are on cruise control right now, smashing their opponents with the lethal combo of Manning, CJ2K, and Frank Gore. The trade of Brandon Marshall has forced the Jubas to resort to deploying multiple tight end formations including Dallas Clark and Vernon Davis as regular starters. However, the combination has proved lethal. Averaging nearly 110 points a contest, the Jubas are out for blood and blood they are getting.

2010: 5 Games In

2010-10-14T13:03:00.001-07:00

One Tight End Not Featured this Weekend

2010-10-07T01:40:00.000-07:00

This week marks a CTDB event so cosmically large, it threatens to bring down CBS Sportsline. Yes, we are talking about the Fat Jubas vs. the Fobsters, but not because they are topping the SMG division.

No, this marks a sure to be record-breaking Tight Endxtravaganza. With each team featuring three tight ends each, this Sunday could very well blind the entire league.

The players know what's at stake. Said Vernon Davis: "Dallas, Tony G, and me, we've been waiting all year for this! We'll come out and show them who's tightest!"

Of course, this all requires the cooperation of Fobsters GM Jimmy, who is rumored to be sitting Jason Witten this weekend. "I don't care for no record. We gotta get Jason healthy!" fumed Jimmy. GM Eric of the Jubas had no comment when asked if he would consider starting a 4th TE in either co-captain RBs Frank Gore or Chris Johnson's slot.

LDT a Starter Again?

2010-10-02T18:24:00.000-07:00

According to Monkey sources, LaDainian Tomlinson has been taking first team snaps during practice and is expected to be in the starting lineup this week. Wiith Pierre Thomas nursing an ailing knee and Jamaal Charles on bye, Charger brass have been increasingly looking into having Tomlinson move into his familiar role – starting tailback. Reports indicate the Tomlinson will be paired with Ryan Mathews – matching up the former Charger superstar with the current Charger rookie tailback. This would be the first starting opportunity for LT after 3 weeks of watching from the sidelines.

Ryan Mathews told reporters this morning, “They haven’t told me anything but I would relish an opportunity to play with LT. LT is a legend in Monkey franchise history and it’d be my honor to start alongside him. We have a lot of weapons on this team. You guys saw it last week with what Quan, Roddy, and Marsh-dog were able to do with Philip. For us running backs, we just need to carve out a few yards on first down and then enjoy the rest.”

Chargers GM, Evan, in his weekly conference call said “Our coaches will make the final call but I would certainly be very excited about seeing LT out there. He’s been doing great in practice and has been a leader in the clubhouse. We are very excited about having him here and his presence no doubt has a positive effect on Ryan, JC and PT Cruiser. Coach has put in a few plays just for LT and it wouldn’t surprise me if we all got to see the old LT leap for a few more scores this weekend.”

FlaccoGate

2010-09-28T11:02:00.000-07:00

It started innocently enough. During WK1, a blowout was in the making as Buffy had already more than doubled the Dirty Birds' score heading into Monday night. In a move to protect his young quarterback and to secure his place on the waiver wire, GM Jon pulled Ravens' QB Joe Flacco from the lineup. Immediately, cries of foul play rang out through the league as this went against the nature of "fight for every yard." Camaraderie and the sanctity of honor among owners was forever shattered. Local media lambasted Coach Jon for his devilish move, labeling it "immature, a sin, and just downright awful."

"Sure, Flacco's eight measly points that night wouldn't have mattered but an unspoken rule was broken," said one anonymous general manager. "What that franchise did there is as bad as Spygate, and we all know how karma came back to bite the Patriots in the ass." If you recall, New England went undefeated all the way through to the Super Bowl before being upended by the helmet catch in the greatest Super Bowl upset of all time.

Well, how has karma been treating the Dirty Birds? The week after their 151-63 loss to Buffy, the Birds got steamrolled again, losing to Ante Up 116-80. Things were looking dire as starting QB Joe Flacco had put up thirteen points in two combined weeks and newly acquired running back Michael Turner sustained an injury. Facing the league's toughest schedule, it looked like the fantasy gods were going to keep the Birds from ever winning a game this season, as punishment for their audacity.

Luckily, waiver wire wonder WR Austin Collie (nabbed with that "strategic" WK1 waiver wire move) has emerged as the top non-QB scorer in the entire league. Sure it's been only three weeks but Collie has scored more points than Adrian Peterson, Chris Johnson, and almost twice as many points as his teammate, Reggie Wayne. While it's pretty doubtful Collie can keept his up, his spot on the Dirty Bird roster is secure as he fills the third WR position behind Larry Fitzgerald and Miles Austin quite nicely.

Behind Collie's 35 points, Adrian Peterson's 33 pts, and Michael Vick's 41 points, the Dirty Birds finally picked up a win this week, trouncing the Tiiite End Jammers 136 - 90. Oh right, Michael Vick, another waiver wire wonder, has vaulted to the top of the charts, ranking only behind Peyton Manning in scoring so far this young season. Given his newfound accuracy and position as the Eagles' starter, Vick could easily capture the Dirty Birds' QB position the rest of the way, keeping Flacco and Matt Ryan on the bench. Management believes the karmic payback for FlaccoGate is now over and has dedicated themselves to taking the high road the rest of the season.

One note, the Birds are still kickerless but are in negotiations with a few high profile candidates. John Carney perhaps?

Monkeys Recovering...

2010-09-27T12:16:00.001-07:00

The team isn’t quite hitting on all cylinders but certainly the trend is right. After two straight sub-90 point games (this is the first time the Monkeys have scored under 90 in consecutive games since 2001!), the Monkeys to have appeared to have straightened the ship in Week 3 with a minor 130+ point explosion against IDK division leader and rival, Buffy. Rivers is the second best quarterback in the league while the passing game finally came alive in week 3, mostly buoyed by Anquan Boldin’s 36 point outburst (8 receptions for 140+ yards and 3 TDs). Roddy White is averaging over 15 points per week while Brandon Marshall is showing weekly signs of improvement .

The big question for the Monkeys is the running game – an unlikely problem for a running powerhouse franchise. Jamaal Charles has been lightning in a bottle but continues to see shared touches with Thomas Jones. Ryan Mathews has been largely ineffective and was knocked out of the last 1.5 games with an ankle injury. Pierre Thomas was serviceable in his substitute start but the Monkeys will need to see more stable production from their run game if they are to make a deep run this year.

Monkey’s GM, Evan, was still concerned despite his team’s week 3 win over Buffy. “We’re doing better – no question. However, Ryan’s injury may linger and JC’s inconsistent touches have got me a bit worried. With all the moves we made this off season, we knew that this would be a transition season. However, if we can get our ground game going – I feel very good about our playoff prospects. We’ll see in a few weeks.”

The League

2010-09-15T22:38:00.001-07:00

There's a whole TV show centered around fantay football. Yes I know this sounds like the stupidest thing ever, but after watching all six episodes in marathon form over the weekend, I can heartily recommend The League to any fan of fantasy sports. While the humor isn't exactly my cup of tea, even I have to admit that the fast paced jokes about balls, penises, and pubes are kind of hilarious. Also, The League makes quite the statement about the modern emasculated man. Created by the team behind Curb Your Enthusiasm, the show is semi-scripted and heavily improv-ed. You should probably at least watch the pilot from Season 1 on Hulu before moving onto Season 2, which premieres this week on FX.

"The show centers around a group of buddies, all in their 30’s, best friends from high school, some of them now married, some with kids, others still single. The laughs come from the interactions between this tight group of guys, and the token cool chick who is actually the wife of one of the guys. The topics of discussion are pretty male-centered; toilet humor, references to sex, football trades, and one-upmanship. It’s far smarter than other shows and movies that have tried this formula."
-Here's why you need to be watching The League-

Grading the 2010 Draft

2010-09-08T00:56:00.000-07:00

With the dawn of a new season, there's been a few rules tweaks and in terms of the draft, and expansion of two more rounds. That means there's a whole lot more players to analyze so without further ado, a mega long draft review for a season that will undoubtedly be full of surprises and intrigue, especially after so much player movement over the off-season. We can't recall keeper rosters dramatically changing so much for so many teams, but we sure like the new coat of paint everyone has put on as we head into our official tenth year of Catch the Damn Ball.

1. Fat Jubas
Coming off a big upset playoff win in 2008, Eric's team was looking for a return to glory in 2009. Instead Fat Jubas' fans were treated to a putrid 4-8-1 record and a new number one -- the number one draft pick. After being the first champion to represent the Spunky Misunderstood Genius division in 2005, Eric has had to deal with new SMG contenders that have leapfrogged him to glory. Not one to rest on his laurels, GM Eric completely remade his team in just one off-season. Prior to the draft he'd turned Michael Turner into Peyton Manning to replace the retired Kurt Warner. And amidst heavy rumors, he drafted rookie RB Ryan Mathews first overall and then flipped him for the consensus number one player in all of fantasy, RB Chris Johnson. Suddenly the Jubas had Manning and Johnson to pair with his already strong keeper cast of Frank Gore, Marques Colston, and Dallas Clark.

The good news didn't stop there as he pulled together a stellar draft. First, three more tight ends: Vernon Davis, Tony Gonzalez, and Kellen Winslow. The Fobsters have tried this trick before, the run-it-tight offense, but never with FOUR tight ends. Lei's fans must be screaming in agony. Along with those productive athletes, Eric got a steal in Vincent Jackson, who would normally be a top ten receiver if not for his contract issues. Even if he gets traded or comes back later in the season, Jackson was well worth the pick in round two. Justin Forsett, the spare running back, will probably lead the Seahawks in rushing and even late rounder Eddie Royal has some potential. We love the Jubas' draft and with this haul, Eric probably won't be picking this high again for quite some time.
Grade: A

2. Tiiite End Jammers
It's also a year of transition for the Jammers, who haven't gotten into the playoffs for three years running. They bottomed out last year as their roster fell apart and many of Lei's previous keepers were told to hit the road coming into this season (see ya Joseph Addai, Clinton Portis, Dwayne Bowe, and Lee Evans). The good news is there's a promising bit of youth churned up by last year's draft. Running backs Rashard Mendenhall and Bonzi Wells have starting jobs for their teams, young receiver Michael Crabtree looks like he'll be good, and there's always that other Steve Smith, who might be better than the actual Steve Smith. Lei went heavy on the steady veterans with his draft, nabbing Ryan Grant, Hines Ward, Percy Harvin, TJ Houshmanzadeh, and Ricky Williams. Only Harvin has more upside at this point in his career but he'll might face some migraine issues this year, even as opportunity knocks with Sidney Rice out.

We agree with Lei's decision to add some age to his young lineup, to act as ballast in case the season threatens to tip over again. And we absolutely think Grant was a steal here because he's a solid 1200 yard, 8 TD guy and some publications are listing him as a top ten back. Late rounders RB Donald Brown and WR Kenny Britt add some depth to the roster but it's hard to see them as more than irregular fill-ins. The Jammers season will rest on how the young guys develop and if Mendenhall or Wells can become true feature backs, the supplemental draft only provided serviceable but not great pieces. Late breaking news is that TJ Houshmanzadeh will be cut or traded by the Seahawks. That could spell trouble.
Grade: B+

3. Philadelphia Phreaks
Like the Jammers, the Phreaks haven't made the playoffs in three years and are veterans of drafting high. Things might not be going up immediately either, as the core roster lost some shine during the 2009 season. Marshawn Lynch and Darren McFadden, keepers just one year ago, are now gone. The Phreaks have been given high draft grades the past few years but they seem to have run into a bit of bad luck. For example, McFadden, a number overall pick just two years ago, was a borderline super bust.

This off-season, Ping decided to take fandom to a new level by retaining four Eagles or ex-Eagles on his keeper roster. That haul includes two quarterbacks, Donovan McNabb and Kevin Kolb, neither of whom are projected to be top five QBs. The fifth keeper, RB Maurice Jones-Drew is a stud, but can he carry an all Eagles lineup? Ping excerbated the issue by grabbing Eagles tight end Brent Celek in RD4. Sure we believe the Kolb-led Eagles have potential but will having Kolb, DeSean Jackson, Jeremy Maclin, and Celek lead to fantasy victories?

The good news is we like the rest of Ping's draft. First rounder Jahvid Best is projected to be a star, Steelers receiver Mike Wallace will have every chance to emerge as a game changer, and there's always the explosive potential of Felix Jones. Backing up all those Eagles' receivers will be Derrick Mason, who is as steady as they come. Backup backup running back Fred Jackson will start the season off slow but he's proven he can be effective when healthy. Ping had another homer pick late, drafting Stanford's Toby Gerhart. If the Vikings' Adrian Peterson goes down, watch out for the next great white running back! And of course, Mr. David Akers, welcome back to the Phreaks.
Grade: E for Eagles (Okay, it's really a B-)

4. Buffy
Having just covered the Buffy franchise, we are well aware of its past, its present, and its hope for the future. Last year's draft was an unmitigated disaster. Three straight strikes with TJ Houshmanzadeh, Lance Moore, and Torry Holt led to the selection of a kicker in RD4. Roger did draft Jamaal Charles two rounds later but he was cut long before his explosive back end of the season. After participating in some major blockbusters recently, Buffy is coming out with a new look as they now have a much stronger running game (led by Steven Jackson, Marion Barber, Matt Forte) and a diminished passing game (Wes Welker, Antonio Gates and no more Philip Rivers). Favoring established veterans as always, Roger took Chad Ochocinco and Santana Moss in the early rounds, shoring up the passing attack quite nicely. Ochocinco and Moss have been around the block but they have another solid season in them. Last round pick Mike Williams was a bust early in his career but perhaps new scenery in Seattle and a reunion with his college coach will make him a viable option.

The guy we're excited about is second round pick Arian Foster, who many pundits are very high on. Reggie Bush is a fine fifth back and while he's past the promise of stardom, he'll still likely be an effective plug-in. Roger is going with Carson Palmer and Brett Favre as his QBs, both of whom have some question marks, but there's a decent chance at least one of them is a top signal caller. Stephen Gostowski, the kicker drafted in RD4 last year, was taken in the much more reasonable seventh round this year. He must have some sort of blackmail on the Buffy GM.
Grade: B

5. Fobsters
This embattled franchise may finally be gaining some positive momentum as GM Jimmy has sheparded them to two playoff appearances in the last three years. What they need now is some star power, which has been the big Achilles' heel of the team. Despite drafting high in the recent past, the Fobsters have been unable to unearth a franchise player. Reggie Bush was an injury prone tease and is no longer with the team. WR Calvin Johnson is one of the most talented players in the league but he's coming off a disappointing year. The only player with franchise caliber statistics out of the five keepers is Tom Brady, who simply has to have a monster season for the Fobsters to succeed. Brady will have good targets to throw to in Johnson and fellow keepers Pierre Garcon and Jason Witten though. Plus, the draft turned up a very nice selection of receviers with opportunity and upside: Dez Bryant, Jacoby Jones, Santonio Holmes, and Tampa Bay's rookie, Mike Williams.

The biggest problem for this team is at running back. Cadillac Williams was shockingly a keeper selection despite not surpassing 1000+ yards rushing since his rookie year. The Caddy is also just a little injury prone. Actually let's talk about the Fobster running back injury curse, which might overtake the Madden Curse in efficiency. New draft pick Michael Bush is already out for at least a month with a broken thumb. Rookie Montario Hardesty just torn his ACL and is out for the season (just like Jimmy's RD1 pick last year, Kevin Smith). The only other RB on the roster is Joseph Addai, who has appeal as a running-receiving threat, and could score 10+ TDs again, but he's hardly a number one back. And of course Addai is also injury prone. Until the Fobsters can find a consistent guy or two in the backfield -- or at least a few healthy bodies -- they're going to have trouble breaking into the top tier of the league. Oh in the last round they added some RB named Joe McKnight. Basically the question Jimmy wants to ask is: "Can I run an empty backfield offense all season?"
Grade: D

6. Ante Up
After three years of no post-season play and two straight last place divisional finishes, Ante Up returned to respectability last year by finishing 7-6 and earning a spot in the playoffs. They're going to need another solid season to take the next step toward contention. Consistently one of the better judges of draft prospects, Jae has been excellent at identifying young players (running backs in particular) and guiding them to terrific first seasons. That accounts for his current promising keeper backfield of Ray Rice, James Stewart, and LeSean McCoy, who are all stellar talents. Ray Rice in particular is a gem as he was drafted at the top of the third round last season and is arguably the third best fantasy RB in the game. Ante Up also drafted a bonafide franchise quarterback in Aaron Rodgers last year, who went on to be a top fantasy player and is being touted as a MVP candidate this year.

Coming into 2010, Jae was very logically looking for some receiver talent for Rodgers to throw to. He drafted Mike Sims-Walker, Bernard Berrian, Devin Aromashodu, and Jabar Gaffney to fill out the spots next to Reggie Wayne. All four new faces have tremendous opportunity this season. The backup running backs will be Darren Sproles, who is a dynamite part time player, and Bernard Scott, who isn't starting now but has the tools necessary to be very productive if Cedric Benson goes down. Overall, another solid and rational draft from GM Jae, who is hoping that at least one of his new receiving options breaks out so he can have the passing game to pair with his ground game.
Grade: B

7. Dirty Birds
Traditionally the Dirty Birds have not drafted well. Outside of the 2007 draft where they picked up Adrian Peterson, Wes Welker, and Greg Jennings, they haven't found many serviceable players lately. The Birds always draft QBs early because of their need at the position and this year was no different, as they selected Joe Flacco and Matt Ryan in RD2 and RD7 respectively. Sure both Flacco and Ryan are entering the phase of their careers where they might take off statistically but value wise they may have been drafted too high since eight teams already had QBs as keepers -- which is by far a league record.

With the off-season two for one trade of Stephen Jackson and Wes Welker for Michael Turner, the Birds gained a most lusted after Falcon but lost receiver depth. Larry Fitzgerald and last year's surprise star, Miles Austin, are back but there's a chasm at the third WR position. GM Jon chose to fill that hole with matchup nightmare TE Jermichael Finley, who could be the next Tony Gonzalez. If Finley instead turns out to be the next Kyle Brady, deep threats Robert Meachem, Mohamed Massaquoi, and Laurent Robinson will need to really step up. The backfield is steady though, with Peterson and Turner leading a strong stable of runners that include up and comers Knowshon Moreno and CJ Spiller. Big brute Brandon Jacobs will serve as the goal line back, assuming he can stay healthy. The Birds swung for the fences this year with high potential low previous production players and will have to hope some of their gambles pay off.
Grade: C

8. Battle Angels
The newest iteration of the Battle Angels have been a powerhouse team lately. They've had the best regular season record two years running, came within a handful of points away from leading PF both years, and won a championship in an epic Super Bowl VIII. It looked like 2009 was going to be a possible repeat year for Vu but then real live Super Bowl MVP Drew Brees laid an absolute egg during the most inopportune time and Gang Green upset the Angels on the way to their second championship. And that's why they play the game! Frothing at the mouth, Coach Vu will be out to prove that they are the king of the Spunky Misunderstood Geniuses division -- and maybe the entire league since four out of the last five championships have involved SMG owners.

The Battle Angels are the only one to retain all five keepers from the previous year and that means Brees will look downfield at familiar targets Andre Johnson, Steve Smith, and Greg Jennings. With such a powerful receiving corps, Vu needed to find a complement to DeAngelo Williams and he went back to his very nice RD5 pick last year, Cedric Benson, with his first pick this year. Williams didn't repeat his monster season from 2008 last year, and now splits a lot more carries with Jonathan Stewart, but he's still an excellent option. Clinton Portis could have one last fling with Mike Shanahan in Washington but Kevin Smith is still injury prone -- and currently dinged up -- so both backups can't be counted on for extended play. The Angels could go to the run and shoot again, which has brought them great success, since they did draft Malcolm Floyd, Terrell Owens, Lee Evans, and Dexter McCluster. Floyd in particular is looking great now with the Vincent Jackson situation in San Diego. It could be another season of bombs away for the Angels and the rest of the league better look out.
Grade: A-

9. Chunky Monkeys
After finally winning that elusive championship in 2006, the Monkeys have suffered through epic collapse after epic collapse recently, including two gigantic mega ones in the last two Super Bowls. If you're a David looking to upend a Goliath, the Monkeys have been your foil of choice. Fed up with his powerful but ultimately underachieving squad, GM Evan went to work this off-season and cleared the decks. Gone are faces of the franchise Peyton Manning and LaDainian Tomlinson (although he was redrafted back). In a series of trades, the Monkeys acquired Philip Rivers, Roddy White, Brandon Marshall, and 2010 first overall pick Ryan Mathews. The lone keeper holdover is Anquan Boldin, who has his own NFL trade to adjust to. The cost for all these moves was steep, as Manning and running back sensation Chris Johnson are now the property of the Fat Jubas. And up and down Matt Forte was the additional cost of bringing in White.

The new look Monkeys are certainly different but it looks like they'll still be quite impressive on paper. In fact, they could be deeper than ever. Last year's waiver wire wonder Jamaal Charles is back to pair with Mathews. Rivers will have three number one receivers to throw to. The draft trade also allowed Evan to move up and grab Dwayne Bowe, who had a terrible year last season but isn't that far removed from his earlier productivity. Johnny Knox and Legedu Naanee are long shots but young and worth the risk.

In the backfield, Pierre Thomas and LaDainian Tomlinson are both involved in time shares and don't have much upside but they'll have their moments. The real excitement is rookie Kareem Huggins, who back ups Cadillac Williams in Tampa Bay, which means he's just an injury away from starting. If Evan's track record with young RBs holds true, Huggins could be a find. The Monkeys are retooled and looking for a season that ends in a trophy, not a consolation prize.
Grade: B+

10. Gang Green
Maybe we were a bit hasty in anointing defending champ Gang Green "The Team of the Decade" after last season's improbable post-season run to a second championship. But really, who's got a better case? The only player to have been kept by Gang Green over the last three seasons has been Ronnie Brown, who averaged ten games each year and went over 1000+ yards rushing during that span exactly zero times. So that's been Greg's "star power." And while Greg has had some success in the draft in the past, he's recently drafted so low that he's never had a shot at a blue chip rookie. Instead he's gotten by on a variety of veterans, sleepers, and savvy free agent pickups. If the Monkeys have been the Goliaths of CTDB, Gang Green has certainly been the David.

The new Gang Green keeper core is led by Matt Schaub, who had the most passing yards in the NFL last year and a break out fantasy campaign. He'll still have Randy Moss to throw to but one of last season's heroes, Sidney Rice, is out for at least six games. That means there will be a lot of pressure on draft picks Hakeem Nicks, Donald Driver, Braylon Edwards, and Steve Breaston to fill the gaping hole at receiver. None of these guys are their team's number ones but we're thinking Coach Greg will motivate some production out of them. Schaub himself is a little injury prone so Eli Manning will back him up, which gives Greg two 4000+ yard passers on the roster.

The backfield also needs a bit of shoring up as Ronnie Brown probably can't be counted on for a full season. Luckily, last year's late season RB surprise, Jerome Harrison, is once again the starter in Cleveland (after Montario Hardesty's injury). Harrison will pair with sophomore running back Shonn Greene, who put up miniscule numbers in limited carries last year but showed during the NFL playoffs that he's a player on the rise. There's no depth behind these three -- unless you think last round pick Thomas Jones is the answer -- so Greg might have to find some help here in-season. For some reason, Gang Green has drafted a defense in RD3 two seasons in a row. Last year it was the Steelers, this year it's the Jets. Is that the secret of their success? Drafting a defense early? Next year I'm drafting my defense in round one!
Grade: B-

Above the Clouds

2010-09-07T00:40:00.000-07:00

Historical Record
There's little doubt that the Birds have cemented themselves in league history in a number of ways. They've won two championships, they own the second highest all time winning record (77-60-5), and they hold the longest winning streak for a season (11). Of course they've also had the third longest losing streak ever (8), scored the second least points ever in a season, and averaged just about the worst points per season ever. 2002 and 2007 were the championship years while 2003 and 2006 found the Birds dead last in their division. Ever dangerous and ever streaky, that's been the Birds' way.

Through it all, they have been to the playoffs six out of nine years, suffered just three losing seasons, and managed to put themselves in the conversation for best team ever. Actually, there would be a lot more traction for that argument if they didn't have such tough divisional rivalries. Buffy has always proven to be a thorn in the side for the Birds, as the pair of two time champs wage constant battles for the last playoff seed. Buffy aside, the biggest hurdle for the Birds have been Evan's Chunky Monkeys, who have eliminated Jon's team in the conference finals two years running (plus another time in 2005).

More aggravating though, is the Monkey's regular season dominance, which have allowed the Birds to win the top seed -- and a playoff bye -- only once. Here's a fun stat: the Birds have a winning or even record with every other team in the league except against the Monkeys, who have dominated the Birds to the tune of 14-6 in their matchups. That's a 0.300 winning percentage for Jon versus Evan. (The only other team the Birds are down versus is Ante Up, but that is by only one loss.) "You damned dirty ape!"

Recently the Birds have found themselves in a very stable place, with three consecutive winning seasons and three straight second place divisional finishes. Unless their retooled roster collapses, the Birds can look forward to doing plenty more Dirty Bird dances.

Core Roster
There's been no shortage of player movement in the Dirty Birds' history. They've been the most active trade partner in the league and average one roster shakeup per year, and usually for a big name. Right out of the gates, GM Jon signed off on a trade for Ahman Green, giving up franchise cornerstone Eddie George just a few weeks into the first season. That gave the Birds a stellar backfield of Green and Corey Dillon, who became one of the best running combos in the league. The inaugural draft also produced Marvin Harrison, who would team with a number of big name receivers over the years. Two Atlanta Falcons were drafted that year, as RB Jamal Anderson was on his way down while QB Michael Vick was about to explode. The stand in QB that first year was Tom Brady, free agent surprise and eventual superstar -- but not for the Birds.

By the second CTDB season, the Dirty Birds had completely gelled and romped their way to a championship led by Vick, Green, Dillon, Harrison, Plaxico Burress, Jerry Rice, and young Chad Johnson and Koren Robinson. Jon's quick trigger finger decimated the team next year as he traded away Vick, Green, and Harrison for the rights to Ricky Williams, Drew Bledsoe, Joe Horn, and Charles Rogers. That trade imploded when Ricky retired soon after and Lei's Tiiite End Jammers went on to an easy championship powered by the Birds' star players (and Priest Holmes).

A few seasons in, Jon's team was wiped of talent and he hit the draft boards and free agent bread line. Over the next three years there became a rotating array of players such as Plaxico Burress, Joe Horn, Rudi Johnson, Willis McGahee, Roy Williams, Larry Fitzgerald, Cadillac Williams, and even an unretired Ricky Williams. Trades for Jamal Lewis, Randy Moss, and Plaxico came and went. The drafting of Steven Jackson in 2005 solidified the backfield. For the next few years, it would be S-Jax, Rudi, and Fitzgerald who would lead the team.

Never one to sit on a quarterback, the Birds traded away Tom Brady before his record setting year -- and Randy Moss in a separate move -- but still managed to co-win a Super Bowl with a loaded receiving corps that boasted Fitzgerald, Burress, Braylon Edwards, Wes Welker, and Greg Jennings. Dependable plodder Rudi Johnson was replaced by dynamic rookie Adrian Peterson and the Birds soon featured two top five running backs and three top fifteen receivers. Post-Brady, the Birds have rotated through QBs like Ben Roethlisberger, Matt Hasselbeck, Jay Cutler, Carson Palmer, Jason Campbell, and Matt Ryan. Whoever provided less headache usually won the starting gig for the week.

A few words here about Plaxico Burress, who has been acquired and dumped by Dirty Birds management quite a few times. He was traded onto the team in 2002, cut by 2004, reacquired via trade in 2005, and then traded away in 2008. You could call it a love hate relationship and no wonder Burress shot himself in the leg. It's almost inevitable he'll become a Dirty Bird again in the future.

During this past offseason, Steven Jackson was finally shipped off after five successful seasons (along with Wes Welker) and Falcon Michael Turner was brought in to pair with Peterson. With a proven knack for finding young receiving talent, the Birds struck again with Miles Austin last year and going forward he'll replace Welker in the lineup. A strong running game, deep receivers, and some patchworking at quarterback, that has been the Dirty Birds' way and it's resulted in two championships. Is a third on the horizon?

Season Breakdowns
2009: 7-5-1; Second in division and lost to Chunky Monkeys in conference finals
2008: 7-6; Started off 5-1, finished second in division and lost to Chunky Monkeys in conference finals
2007: 10-3; Second in division and advances to Super Bowl where they tied with Gang Green for co-champs
2006: 4-8-1; Started off 1-5-1, and despite winning their last three games, tanked to last place in the division
2005: 7-6; Third seed for the playoffs and gets knocked out first round by Chunky Monkeys
2004: 6-7; Starts off 6-3 but loses last four games of the regular season to barely sneak into the post-season, where they were beat by eventual champ Buffy in round one
2003: 5-8; Lost four in a row to slide into last place in the division during title defense year
2002: 10-3; Goes on a record eleven game winning streak and hoses the competition for their first Super Bowl win
2001: 7-6; Had a five game winning streak but ends up out of playoffs due to tie-break

Stats (full)
Highest Avg Game Score, Season: 115.60 (2002)
Most Points Scored, Game: 157 (2002)
Least Points Scored, Game: 45 (2001)
Best Margin of Victory, Game: 84 (2002)
Worst Margin of Defeat, Game: -71 (2003)
Longest Winning Streak, Season: 11 (2002)
Longest Losing Streak, Season: 8 (2006)

Lightning Strikes Twice?

2010-09-01T18:54:00.000-07:00

This has been an off-season for change for the Monkeys. Gone are Peyton Manning, Chris Johnson and Matt Forte. That's enough talent to kick start any team in the league (actually, you can find Peyton and CJ down the road in Jubas camp).

However, one thing will remain: LaDainian Tomlinson will be a Monkey. While there were some questions of the Monkeys to re-sign Tomlinson this offseason, Monkeys' management made it a priority to bring LT under contract this past week.

Tomlinson, the original 4th round draft pick from the Monkeys' inaugural draft, has been the public face of the franchise for the last decade. The heart and soul of the team has been the unquestioned leader for the past 10 years. With that in mind, Monkeys GM, Evan, announced earlier today that Tomlinson will indeed be back for his 10th season with the Monkeys.

In his afternoon statement to the press, Monkey's GM, Evan, said, "LT is a big part of our franchise and we recognize that. LT knows that his role may be changing this year but he is our unquestioned leader for our roster. He'll serve as a terrific mentor to Ryan (Mathews) and JC (Charles). We expect LT to also make several starts throughout the year and I suspect that people will see the LT of old. That means that this is a good football move for our club."

Tomlinson was all smiles during his introduction to the media. "This is a dream come true. I am a Monkey for life and to have an ability to come back and mentor these young kids -- it really is a dream come true. We have a young team this year but I expect for us to compete like every other year for that ring."

The Greatest Show

2010-08-31T03:27:00.000-07:00

Continuing our series of franchise recaps, we have just a few teams left and none is higher caliber than Buffy, the only two time solo winner of the CTDB Super Bowl. Invited to every legends gathering and a consistent winner and active general manager, Roger has contributed many wins, articles (especially his "Game of the Week" posts), and loads of fantasy experience during the past decade. Buffy has always been a crowd favorite and a premier gate draw as they consistently boast big name stars and a winning attitude. Let's take a closer look at one of the most decorated franchises in the league.

Historical Record
During year one of our keeper denomination, Buffy came out of the gates with a mega team that dominated on their way to our inaugural championship. They averaged 115 points per season and blew everyone out of the water. Loaded with a young team that won ten straight games to close out the season, the other owners were worried that Roger might remain at the top for years to come. Surprisingly, Buffy wouldn't see the playoffs again for two years, even with a roster that boasted Rams Marshall Faulk and Torry Holt during their primes.

When Buffy made the playoffs again in 2004 -- barely squeaking in as a wild card team with a losing record -- they made history again. With a spurt of five wins in a row, they upset their way to another championship by defeating favorite after favorite. At this point in time, Buffy had taken two of the first four Super Bowls and looked poised for more.

Unfortunately, the next few years would bring Buffy only two more playoff berths and no shot at another championship. A remarkable stat for you: Buffy didn't suffer their first playoff loss until 2006 as every time they had made the post-season they won the whole damn thing. However, aside from that initial 10-3 regular season record, Buffy has actually hovered around six or seven wins each season, with only a dramatic dip in 2008. This tells us that Buffy has always managed to stay competitive but haven't quite been able to recreate the dominance of their first year.

Still, there were highlights galore with this team over the years. They set and reset the single game high score mark a few times. They set the standard for many categories in the first season's record books. They were the one team that took down the Chunky Monkeys in 2006, preventing them from achieving a perfect season. They also hold the record for lowest single game score, at 29 points, set in 2003. They have intense intra-division rivalries -- they've been tie-broken out of the playoffs three times -- and are looking to separate themselves from the championship pack as they close in on three titles.

Core Roster
Buffy's initial drive to success involved pairing a good QB with great receivers and then run-and-shooting with a versatile back. This worked great when the combination included MVPs Marshall Faulk and quarterback Rich Gannon. During their first championship run, Buffy had Torry Holt, David Boston, Rod Smith, and free agent find Qadry Ismail running routes and tearing up defenses. Even with good running back options behind Faulk (such as Charlie Garner and Corey Dillon), Buffy chose to go with a heavy air attack that mirrored the NFL St. Louis Rams'.

The initial five keepers remained pretty steady with Gannon, Faulk, Holt, Boston, and Smith being key parts of the team until 2004 when there was a change at the top with Matt Hasselbeck and other journeymen QBs at the helm. By then Faulk was in decline and had given way to Corey Dillon and Michael Pittman. Torry Holt teamed up with his real life running mate Isaac Bruce, Joe Horn, and one year wonder Michael Clayton to help Buffy win their second championship.

A trade in 2005 signaled that Buffy's core was headed in another direction as a two back attack was now mandatory. A move for Ahman Green, which cost Buffy Joe Horn, didn't work out so well but it was a much needed change.

There's been a revolving door of running back options since. Willie Parker, Jamal Lewis, and Marion Barber have all put in time with this team. Often they've been paired with one season stand-ins such as Ladell Betts, Kevin Jones, Lendale White, or Travis Henry. There's been a lot of turnover in the backfield and GM Roger has had his work cut out looking for another superstar runner.

At least Torry Holt stayed strong for most of the decade, before finally fading (and being cut in 2009). Steady Derrick Mason has been on and off the roster, and a variety of teasers such as Terry Glenn, Joey Galloway, Laveranues Coles, Jerry Porter, TJ Houshmanzadeh, and Donald Driver have been used to fill out the receiving corps. Buffy loves his big name maybe game receivers and has always drafted accordingly in the late rounds. The 2008 draft turned up eventual stud Roddy White and solid tight end Antonio Gates, who would prove to be perfect transition pieces. Special shout out to kicker Sebastian Janikowski, who was drafted in the sixth round (!) during our first draft and has since then, more often than not, been property of Buffy.

Under center, Buffy managed to find a steady leader in Carson Palmer, who had a three year run for Buffy and will be back in 2010 as well. Due to Palmer's declining health and semi-erratic play, Buffy had the foresight to nab Philip Rivers for a season and a half, and that would soon parlay into a huge offseason. Speaking of offseasons, after years of not being involved in many trades (the archives only note that one Horn-Green trade), Buffy took the leap this offseason and participated in two blockbusters that would result in an entirely new look for them.

First they acquired RBs Michael Turner and Matt Forte for Philip Rivers and Roddy White. Then they turned around and turned Turner into RB Steven Jackson and WR Wes Welker. With a Rams RB back in the fold, will Buffy now achieve the post-season success that have eluded them since their second Super Bowl win? The legendary run-and-shoot is but a memory and Buffy now has a strong ground game and possession receivers headed into the upcoming season. If the new crew and philosophy can lead them to another title, Buffy would vault himself to the top of the "Greatest CTDB Team of All Time" discussion. Or simply just end the debate outright.

Season Breakdowns
2009: 7-6; Edged out of playoffs by tie-breaker with Dirty Birds
2008: 4-9; Lost four in a row to slide out of playoff contention
2007: 6-7; Sneaks into the playoffs but eliminated in the first round to eventual co-champion Dirty Birds
2006: 7-5-1; Starts off 0-3-1 but pushes hard to finish second in the division, losing to eventual champion Chunky Monkeys
2005: 7-6; Edged out of the playoffs by tie-breaker with Dirty Birds
2004: 6-7; Wins last five games in a row on way to record second championship
2003: 7-6; Despite a winning record, edged out of playoffs by tie-breaker with Ante Up
2002: 5-8; An up and down season gives way to total collapse as three losses to close out the year ends their repeat hopes
2001: 10-3; Wins the inaugural Super Bowl in dominating fashion, with ten straight wins on the way to the championship

Stats (full)
Highest Avg Game Score, Season: 118.00 (2001)
Most Points Scored, Game: 163 (2006)
Least Points Scored, Game: 29 (2003)
Best Margin of Victory, Game: 90 (2004)
Worst Margin of Defeat, Game: -71 (2005)
Longest Winning Streak, Season: 10 (2001)
Longest Losing Streak, Season: 5 (2004)

Amelica's Tweam

2010-08-29T21:50:00.000-07:00

What's harder to do in a fantasy season? To go winless or to win them all? Well we've had a few teams flirt with both but so far, the only franchise that has been able to get a coveted zero in the win/loss columns for an entire season is the Fobsters. Tragically, they went 0-13 that season and were almost booed out of their city. This franchise is the only one to have gone through an ownership change in CTDB history so a little slack should be called for right? Of course, with only two winning seasons in nine, there's a case to be made here for them as the least successful franchise in history. Let's take a look at how Skool/Fobsters have done over the previous decade.

Historical Record
This is a tale of two franchises. Original owner Jon C. made his contributions early, playing from 2001-2004 and compiling a record of 23-29 while winning a regular season division title in the process. However, despite two playoff appearances in four years, Skool never won a post-season game.

New owner Jimmy, even having played one whole extra season, has only mustered 21 wins during his reign (21-43-1) -- and that includes the disastrous winless season. However, under his stewardship, the Fobsters won a playoff game in 2007 and discounting the first two disastrous seasons, they've been playing nearly .500 ball. So let's just chalk up those transitional years as time for fob star Jimmy to get his bearings. Now that his language skills are up to speed, we'll look forward to what he'll bring to the table as he looks to establish a winning tradition and secure some more playoff victories for the Fobsters.

Well, let's not leave before we get a chance to look at the records that Skool/Fobsters have managed to compile over the years. With this many mentions in the record book, the fans have much to cheer/cringe over.

#1 Lowest Average Game Score, Season: 73.69 (2006)
#3 Lowest Average Game Score, Season: 81.93 (2001)
#1 Leasts Points Scored, Season 958.0 (2006)
#1 Least Wins, Season: 0 (2006)
#2 Least Wins, Season: 2 (2005), tied with Phreaks
#1 Worst Average Point Differential, Season: -38.0 (2006)
#1 Longest Losing Streak, Season: 13 (2006)
#1 Worst Power Ranking, Season: 2004 and 2006

Core Roster
You would think a team with this little team success would have struggled with instability and lack of talent over the years. That's actually not the case at all. The Skool version of the team boasted big names like Daunte Culpepper, Tiki Barber, Isaac Bruce, and Tony Gonzalez right from the get go, when all of them were easily in their primes. Jon C. always had an eye for young talent and unearthed running back Deuce McAllister early on, and had success with speedsters Peerless Price and Donte Stallworth. A 2002 trade of Isaac Bruce for Stephen Davis set the stage for years with a solid backfield while the eventual addition of the two disruptive Johnsons -- Chad and Keyshawn -- kept Skool's team full of big names.

The biggest issue Skool faced was injuries. Daunte Culpepper had tremendous campaigns but got injured quite a bit (leading to a few games worth of QBs like Jay Fiedler) and even flat out benched once. Isaac Bruce, Deuce McAllister, Stephen Jackson, and Tiki Barber were all injury prone or simply ineffective for long stretches. After a promising first few years, Skool's talent base eroded and his tendency to go for proven but declining veterans did him no favors.

When Jimmy came on board, the keeper list was headed by Chad Johnson, Deuce McAllister, and Tony Gonzalez as Culpepper, Barber, Davis, and most of the stars from years before had faded away. A special mention goes here to Tony G for his longevity, especially on a team that has done well with premier pass catching tight ends. Jimmy has shown a fondness for collecting tight ends, as he's even once featured a three tight end set with Gonzalez, Jason Witten, and Kellen Winslow.

With a top three pick three times in four years, GM Jimmy has had his choice of potential talent. Those picks turned into Reggie Bush (2006), Calvin Johnson (2007), and Kevin Smith (2009). Of the three, only Calvin Johnson is still with the team and despite flashes of brilliance from Bush and Smith, they were never the franchise back the Fobsters needed. Hard charging Earnest Graham strung together one and a half good seasons but he's no longer with the team. Interestingly, Cadillac Williams, traded to the Fobsters in a minor deal in 2006, is the new man in the backfield in 2010, after being on and off the roster.

After five years as the face of the franchise, and being the loud mouthed rock during the transitional years, wide receiver Chad Johnson was traded in 2008 (for Larry Johnson, who never worked out) and his fiery presence left a hole in the locker room.

The biggest coup for Jimmy was acquiring QB Tom Brady right before 2007 -- his record setting year --for a low draft pick. That catapulted him to the franchise's most successful year to date and gave the Fobsters a leader on the field. Of course, Brady's subsequent injury really hurt the Fobsters and they go into 2010 looking for some more talent across the board. They've still got Brady, are hoping for a bounce back year from ultra-talented Calvin Johnson, and unearthed free agent find WR Pierre Garcon last year. The Fobsters will continue to fill in the pieces as they look toward notching that third winning record.

Season Breakdowns
2009: 6-7; Had a little win streak heading into the playoffs but was quickly upset by eventual champion Gang Green in the first round
2008: 5-8; Started 4-3 but then lost six games in a row and ended the season fourth place in the division. Franchise QB Tom Brady was lost for the season early.
2007: 8-5; Secures a playoff berth and turns the franchise around despite losing in the divisonal finals to eventual co-champ Gang Green
2006: 0-13; Record setting winless year, 'nuff said
2005: 2-10-1; First year of new ownership and a last place showing, but faced toughest schedule in the league
2004: 4-9; Last place finish with four and five game losing streaks to start and end the season pushes old ownership out the door
2003: 7-6; Finished first in the division and received a bye, only to be upset by Flaming Shrapnel in the playoffs
2002: 6-7; After an injury plagued year, finished one spot out of the playoffs, edged out by tie-breaker
2001: 6-7; Despite having only one game over the century mark, Skool defies all the skeptics and finishes second in the division and wins the Super Mojo Award for most unlikely playoff season.

Stats (full)
Highest Avg Game Score, Season: 104.93 (2007)
Most Points Scored, Game: 145 (2002)
Least Points Scored, Game: 50 (2001)
Best Margin of Victory, Game: 72 (2007)
Worst Margin of Defeat, Game: -93 (2006)
Longest Winning Streak, Season: 6 (2007)
Longest Losing Streak, Season: 13 (2006)

CJ2K Traded!

2010-08-28T22:44:00.000-07:00

Minutes before the deadline for the Juba’s second overall pick in the 2010 draft, the third blockbuster of the summer was reached. In an offseason where we saw the likes of Peyton Manning, Michael Turner, Roddy White, Philip Rivers, Steven Jackson, Wes Welker change uniforms …. It was only fitting that there was one last big move before the start of the season – which included the top player in the fantasy universe. At 11:20 AM PT, Jubas GM agreed to a proposed deal that would net the Jubas team the undisputed best player in the fantasy universe – Chris Johnson.

The price, however, was steep. In exchange for Johnson, GM Eric agreed to send the rights to rookie Ryan Mathews, Brandon Marshall, the second pick in the 2010 draft and the second pick in the 2011 draft to the Monkeys. In addition to Chris Johnson, Eric received a 2nd and 4th rounder this year and a 4th rounder in 2011.

The trade effectively pairs together two former Monkey running backs in Chris Johnson and Frank Gore for the Fat Jubas. The tandem is expected to be the best backfield in CTDB this year. On the flip side, the Monkeys found themselves deep with talent and for the first time in franchise history, stocked with receiver talent. In the first season where carry-overs no longer exist, Monkey management made sure to go deep for their bench. Likely starters, Ryan Mathews and Jamaal Charles, will be backed up by veteran Pierre Thomas. New receivers, Roddy White and Brandon Marshall, will lead a new aerial attack anchored by veteran Anquan Boldin. Dwayne Bowe is also expected to see a fair amount of playing time this year as well.

ESPN Analyst, John Clayton, was skeptical of the move for the Monkeys. “It was a great move for the Jubas. Any time you get an opportunity to get Chris Johnson, you do what you can do get a player of that caliber. I wouldn’t be surprised to see CJ2K achieve 2,500 rushing yards this year. For the Monkeys, I sense rebuilding. After years of Peyton and LT, management wanted to start fresh and they got it. I think Ryan Mathews and Jamaal Charles will have good years but they both have plenty to prove before this trade starts to make sense However, QB Rivers will have a pretty impressive receiver set to throw to. The trio of Boldin, Roddy White and now Brandon Marshall is likely the best receiver line up this franchise has seen. Dwayne Bowe is no slouch either.”

In his announcement to the press, Monkey GM Evan, had this to say about the trade. “It was EXTREMELY difficult to trade CJ but let me be clear – we are very very happy that Ryan Mathews is a Chunky Monkey. We anticipate that he will be a very good running back for this franchise. We certainly wish Chris the best with the Jubas. He had an amazing year last year and we appreciate his contributions to our franchise. However, the opportunity to trade for Ryan and Brandon Marshall and it was move we felt that we, as an organization, had to make. As for Brandon Marshall, Brandon is an extremely talented receiver and we expect that he, Anquan and Roddy will form the best passing attack this franchise has ever seen. This was the year for us to remake our team and I think we’ve undoubtedly achieved that. There will be many first time Monkeys and it’ll be up to our coaching staff to make sure our team plays cohesively. I believe we can do that quite effectively. See everyone in the playoffs.”

All Time Head to Head Records: 2010

2010-08-27T22:14:00.000-07:00

2010 Keepers

2010-08-22T19:23:00.000-07:00

A Whole New World

2010-08-18T21:20:00.000-07:00

In CTDB's long and storied history, there have been relatively few twists added to the successful formula. However, as we approach our tenth anniversary season, we thought it would be a good time to re-examine the rules that have taken us to where we are. After a delay and some nasty behind the scenes fighting and power plays, the new rule tweaks for our 2010 season have been ironed out. Here's what's changed:

Gone Baby Gone

There are no more carryovers for bye weeks.
Bonus points for long touchdowns are eliminated. Previously it was +1 point for TDs for fifty or more yards.

New Rules, New Rules

Starting lineup requirements remain the same but bench positions have been expanded +2 to a total of six.
There will now be a Toilet Bowl for the non-playoff teams to determine the #1 and #2 draft positions each year. Please read this post for details.
~~The waiver wire system has been dramatically changed. We will be using CBS' automated blind bidding auction process. Please refer to the separate post for details.~~
[Update 9.09.10] The waivers system is intact but with a slight change: the order will reset each week to reverse standings order.
Special Teams Points: A blocked punt, PAT, or FG now notch +2 for the team defense/special teams.
Defensive Scoring: A total revamp with the following ranges:

Defensive Yards:
Less than 100 yards allowed: +6 points
100-199 yards allowed: +4 pts
200-299 yards allowed: +2 pts
400-449 yards allowed: -2 pts
450-499 yards allowed: -4 pts
500-549+ yards allowed: -6 pts
Defensive Points:
0 Points allowed: +6 pts
1-6 points allowed: +4 pts
7-13 points allowed: +2 pts
22-27 points allowed: -2 pts
28-34 points allowed: -4 pts
35-45+ points allowed: -6 pts

Rules Shot Through the Heart

Decimal Scoring: Include decimal scoring instead of rounding (down) to nearest point.
Passing Yards Increase: The proposed rule would change every 25 passing yards per 1 point. The original rule was 20 yards per 1 point and now remains the same.
Negative Points for FG Misses: The rule would have assigned -1 point for each FG miss.

Eh, I don't think so Jeeves. Another time.

Point Per Reception: Currently we have 0.5 points per reception, and there was talk of going a full point per reception
Expansion: There was some momentum for expansion but ultimately it was decided against
Head Coach: Adding a Head Coach position was brought up and quickly denied
Requiring a second running back: There was a motion to require another RB slot
Blogging: Each owner would be required to submit one article per season

One more thing...

Lineup deadline is 5 minutes before gametime for each player
~~Illegal rosters score zero points in standings. So if you do not have a full starting roster, lacking a K or Def say, your scores that week will be disqualified~~

Update [9.09.10]
1. The illegal rosters score zero points for the week rule has been eliminated.
2. The free agent auction system is gone and is now a waivers system, with a reset each week in reverse order of standings.

Introducing: Toilet Bowl and the Free Agent Auction

2010-08-17T21:32:00.000-07:00

Toilet Bowl

Instead of just handing the first picks of the draft to the teams that perennially suck, we have decided to hold a Toilet Bowl for the four non-playoff qualifiers. This means that every team will get a chance to keep fighting deep into the post-season. How the Toilet Bowl will work is below:

The four teams not in the playoffs are routed to the consolidation tourney, aka The Toilet Bowl.
Matchups are not conference exclusive, so reseeded #7 plays #10 and #8 plays #9. Use the same playoff matchup seeding rules to determine seeds.
The Toilet Bowl winner and runner up get the #1 and #2 overall picks for the following year’s draft, but only in the first round. Then the draft reverts to reverse order of standings.

~~Free Agent Auction~~

In addition, we have fielded some complaints over the years about how the waiver wire and free agent system works. Currently if you are lower in overall standing than everyone else, you get the pick of the free agent litter on Wednesdays (or whenever the waiver wire was run). This year we will try out an automated blind bidding auction process. As it's run by CBS and this is our first time using it, there might be some kinks to work out. However, this is how I believe it works:

The yearly budge for all acquisitions is set at $100 total
The minimum bid for a free agent is $0
Waiver wire runs daily Tuesday through Saturday (we may have to see how this works and change it)
Free Agent Auction Tiebreaker resets each week to inverse order of standings
Dropped players will not be auctioned for at least 1 (one) day

Currently the system is automated but there is an option for the commissioners to manually approve add/drops. The advantage of this -- from what I've read -- is that the automated option doesn't allow you to rank which players you want to bid on first. We'll see how this plays out.

We feel like this new way of acquiring free agents will add some drama and intrigue to the waiver wire. "Should I bid $20 on this hot new wide receiver in WK2 or save my money?" Notice that the minimum bid is $0 so you could likely continue to pick up free agents after your budget has run out, as long as nobody bids at least $1. I anticipate some fun strategy and angry words from utilizing this system.

Update [9.09.10]
The free agent auction system is gone and is now a waivers system, with a reset each week in reverse order of standings.

2009 Rosters

2010-08-12T06:21:00.000-07:00

Taking into account the two offseason trades so far.

Another Blockbuster

2010-08-04T04:38:00.000-07:00

As the new fantasy football season approaches, owners are getting fired up and trying to decide what their keepers will look like in our new CTDB environment. While rule changes are still being ironed out, one thing that won't change is the number of keepers per roster. While we already had a blockbuster trade earlier this offseason, ESPN has gotten news that another monster has just been signed off on. Division foes Buffy and Dirty Birds have agreed to exchange RB Michael Turner for RB Steven Jackson and WR Wes Welker.

Yes, the same Michael Turner that Buffy acquired six months ago has just been traded away again, after not notching a single game for their new owner. Oh wait, what is this? Digging deep into the archives, it has been revealed that Turner was actually Buffy's late round pick in the 2007 draft. This was before his trade to the Falcons and as LaDainian Tomlinson's backup, he was actually tabbed Buffy's "worst pick of that year." Little did we know that Turner would then explode onto the scene in 2008 and become a fantasy superstar -- albeit for just one season. Heading into the 2010-11 season, Turner is highly ranked but only rushed for 800+ yards last year (in eleven games). Without much receiving ability, it will be a tough act to follow up on his 1,700 rushing and 17 TD performance from 2008.

The running back Buffy gets in return for Turner has no questions about his consistency. Even with back issues last year, Steven Jackson finished second in the league in rushing and has never rushed for less than 1000+ yards since 2004. He also typically adds 40 or so receptions and another 300 receiving yards. The only downside with Jackson is his lowish touchdown numbers, due to being the only cog in the Rams' offense.

Shockingly, Jackson is actually a few months younger than Turner, even though it seems like Turner only exploded on the scene recently. All those years sitting behind LDT might have kept Turner fresh but he and Jackson are from the same NFL draft class. Some experts even have Jackson ranked ahead of Turner in this year's rankings so this trade could have been pretty even just one on one. However, the savvy owner that GM Roger is, he also acquired Wes Welker in the deal.

Seemingly short on receiving talent now that WR Roddy White was traded away, Buffy needed to find another pass catcher. A healthy Wes Welker could help fill that void. Mr. Consistency has put up three 100+ reception seasons in a row and piled up about 1200+ yards each of those seasons. Welker's touchdown numbers are low but he's a guaranteed double digit player each time out. Early thinking had Welker out until November after a horrific knee injury in the final regular season game last year but he seems to be recovering quickly. When healthy, Welker is easily a top fifteen receiver, and Buffy got him basically for free.

The real impetus behind this massive trade was to give the Dirty Birds and Buffy their respective favorite franchises' players. Jon is obviously a Falcons fan and he hasn't had a premier one since the heyday of Michael Vick. Roger used to boast both Marshall Faulk and Torry Holt in their primes but Faulk has long retired and Holt was cut by Buffy last year (and then redrafted as a Jaguar before being viciously cut again). By securing excellent players from their favorite NFL teams, both Jon and Roger hope to recover their championship magic from Super Bowls I and II.

With this move, Buffy continues a roster overhaul and it's possible that their 2009 keepers of Marion Barber, Philip Rivers, Roddy White, Antonio Gates, and Willie Parker could all be different after just one season. Currently they boast Steven Jackson, Matt Forte, Wes Welker, and probably some combination of Marion Jones, TJ Houshmandzadeh, Antonio Gates, and Donald Driver. As for the Birds, they needed some shaking up and had an extra keeper to spare with Adrian Peterson, Larry Fitzgerald, Miles Austin, and Knowshon Moreno all possible keepers alongside Jackson and Welker. After years of having the best running back duo on paper with Peterson and Jackson but only one co-championship to their name, GM Jon was looking for a chemistry changes.

Last year Buffy and Dirty Birds fought it out for a playoff spot and it seems like they're destined to clash again, this time with each other's players.

Mega Deal!

2010-02-17T18:16:00.000-08:00

It didn't take long. After a stunning upset by a fearless Gang Green team, Monkey's GM Evan knew it was time to make a change. Within days of the Super Bowl loss, the final details of a blockbuster deal began to emerge. While the final strokes didn't occur until NFL Super Bowl week (Buffy GM Roger wanted to wait until the Colts lost to the Saints), Monkeys management had been stoking the talks for several weeks.

There was good reason for the time needed for negotiations as this isn't any regular deal. This is a deal that involves three CTDB teams and potentially 3 first rounders and 2 second or third rounders. This will represent massive change for the league in several ways. First, lets get to the deal.

The Monkeys have acquired Philip Rivers (QB) and Roddy White (WR) while Buffy acquires the rights to Matt Forte (RB) and Michael Turner (RB) and Fat Jubas receiving Peyton Manning (QB). No triggers, no escalators, no draft picks - this is just a straight up player for player (for player) trade.

Some thoughts on implications for each team:

Chunky Monkeys. This year has been coming for awhile. The dynamic duo of LT and Peyton Manning had been incomparable for years. The two represented the only starting duo from the original 2001 class and has been the cornerstone for the Monkeys franchise. While LT had a down year despite 12 touchdowns, Peyton Manning was still the undisputed top quarterback in the league. However, despite the dominant decade of wins, streaks and records ... the Monkeys only had one Super Bowl ring to show for it. With LT likely to be released this year, Monkeys brass decided the right deal was in front of them. While Philip Rivers is not quite Peyton Manning, the Monkeys had an opportunity to draft a budding Charger legend along with a top-tier receiver in Roddy White. It was a chance to get younger, solidify a receiving core that has been lacking stability for years and most importantly and symbolically - begin change for the new decade.

Buffy. Wow. This was a huge deal for Buffy as they arguably got the two highest rated (fantasy) players in the draft. While Forte had a down year, both Turner and Forte are first round picks. Unquestionably. There just aren't that many starting running backs and Mike Martz certainly won't hurt. Through this move, the Buffy franchise has also signified a major change in the team's offensive philosophy. Gone are the days of the run n' gun with 4 receiver sets - the formations that made Air-Buffy so famous back in the early 2000s. Forte and Turner are bruising running backs. Buffy will be looking to run.

Fat Jubas. With Frank Gore and Ryan Grant already in the stables, the Jubas had a spare back and they knew it. When the Monkeys came calling with a three way deal with Peyton Manning on the table, it was too good to pass up. Peyton Manning still likely has 3-5 years of elite talent left and will fit in well in the Jubas offensive scheme. Jubas GM Eric-L loves veteran QBs (Warner was the latest but don't forget, this was the team that started Tommy Maddox!). With Manning leading the team, the team got an upgrade in QB. That's hard to do when you had Kurt Warner.

The media fallout was immediate. ESPN analyst, John Clayton, was heard on SportsCenter earlier describing the transaction. "Its too early to declare winners or losers but really this was a trade to validate change. Arguably, the Buffy franchise got the two best current players. However, any time you pick up a franchise quarterback like Peyton Manning, you can't really be called a loser. For the Monkeys, it was a sorely needed shift. Rivers is a great quarter back and Roddy White should give them some much needed stability at the receiver slot."

Chunky Monkey's GM, Evan, told the media: "Before I go into the details and rationale of why we did this deal as an organization, I wanted to spend some time on Peyton Manning. Peyton, as you all know, was the first overall pick for our franchise in 2001 and he will always be recognized as one of the best player in our franchise's history. I could go through all of the stats but you all know his body of work is as impressive as there is in this league. Stastically, there is no one better and more consistent. He brought home a superbowl ring in 2006 and has been the unquestioned co-captain of this team for the last 10 years alongside LaDainian Tomlinson. I want to thank Peyton for giving his all to the Monkey franchise franchise. He embodied the true spirit of what it means to be a Chunky Monkey. Serving as the leader of our franchise for the last 10 years, I have nothing but the deepest respect and admiration for Peyton. Trading Manning was probably the hardest roster decision we've had to make in the last 10 years.

However, today is also an incredibly exciting day for us here in Monkey HQ as we are welcoming two guys who we think will be the elite quarterback of the next decade and a top-flight wide receiver for years to come in Roddy White. Both Philip and Roddy are high-character guys with enormous potential. We saw this trade as an opportunity to acquire elite talent. Our coaching staff here loves Philip Rivers. In fact, we are confident that Philip will be the next face of the Monkeys for the next 15 years - hopefully, he'll be the next Peyton Manning. The acquisition for Roddy White was also very important for us. We've been searching for that go-to #1 wide receiver for awhile now and our coaching staff believe Roddy may be that guy. He's going to be a leader in this club house and certainly will be a high-priority target for Philip."

Greenies Speak

2009-12-30T02:19:00.000-08:00

In the most stunning upset in CTDB Super Bowl history, Gang Green defeated the heavily favored, perennial championship contender Chunky Monkeys. Backing their way into the playoffs on a 3 game losing streak and a 5-8 regular season record, Gang Green got hot at just the right time. Such a dramatic upset has not been seen since the likes of the Giants championship run over the undefeated Patriots and even more so Broadway Joe's guaranteed win for the true Green and White. No doubt this unlikely win will go down in history alongside those memorable games.

No one believed the Gang could overcome such great odds, defeating last year's champion and winner of the division, Battle Angels on their way to the Big Game. The last few years however, CTDB has been a league of parity where anyone can beat anyone on any given week. Green's strategy of being good enough to make the playoffs and getting hot at the right time paid off in spades.

"I'm still in shock. This is truly a dream come true. Splitting the championship with good friend GM Jon in 2007 was awesome, but finally winning a championship outright is extremely satisfying and I can't put into words how good it feels," said GM Greg on the field after the game.

Randy Moss, Super Bowl MVP, and one of the biggest steals in league history said in response to recent criticism about his play, "This championship is even sweeter than my monster season in 2007. Despite all the haters out there I'm a team player and winning this championship outright is what it's all about."

"I'm going to really enjoy this one. I know how hard it is to get here. Even though I didn't get the start in the Super Bowl I know we did it the right way, as a team," said Hines Ward, who has been with Gang Green from the beginning and his days seem to be numbered as he is a free agent next year. Ward was benched at the very last minute in favor of newly acquired Jerome Harrison in a brilliant move that may have sealed the deal to the Green's 2nd championship.

After years of consistently winning with no name talent, Gang Green could be on the rise with young talent in Vincent Jackson and Sidney Rice and possibly finally finding a franchise quarterback in Matt Schaub, but next season can wait as they savor the incredible feeling of winning their very own undisputed championship.

Super Bowl VIIII

2009-12-29T16:36:00.000-08:00

So it's happened, the biggest upset in CTDB history and it basically encapsulates what's been happening this entire decade for us. The Chunky Monkeys romp their way to the playoffs, with a roster brimming with talent, and then get upturned somehow. Meanwhile, Gang Green churns along with a roster devoid of any top tier superstars and manages to just keep winning baby. Last week we talked about Team of the Decade? There can be no question anymore, it's Green Team, with two Super Bowl wins, an excellent overall wins record, and a huge heads up matchup record against the Monkeys. Is it any coincidence that kryptonite is green? I doubt it, since Greg's team has managed to turn a five win regular season into a championship. In fact, Gang Green slip slopped their way into the playoffs on the heels of four losses and managed to get hot at the right time, and played three playoff opponents who scored less than 90 points each week. Remember, the four leaf clover is also green!

So yeah, the Superman-esque Monkeys came out flat, losing 88-111. That's all there is to say. Chris Johnson was his usual stellar self with 142 rushing yards and a touchdown, and star receiver Anquan Boldin continued his good play with 15 points. That's all the highlights the Monkeys had. His big move at the quarterback position, from Peyton Manning to Vince Young, resulted in one less point, even though Manning only played a half of a game -- scoring nine pts. Late season sensation Jamaal Charles piled up another fine week with 124 yards combined but was actually outpointed by LaDanian Tomlinson (18 to 13), who turned in two touchdowns from the bench. And key Monkeys' contributor Mike Sims-Walker collapsed with two points, scoring less than both the kicker and the defense.

But even as Evan pulled an absolute clunker, Greg still needed to play the game and take advantage of a tremendous opportunity. Gang Green's stars really showed up this week in full force. QB Matt Schaub has been on a tear lately and continued his (playoff) MVP performance with a 24 point showing, following 29 and 22 points in his previous games. With Schaub as the steady rudder for this squad, Greg has been able to boom and bust with the rest of his roster. Last week, Thomas Jones crapped out with five points. This week he had only low single digits heading into the fourth quarter but then pounded his way to a touchdown and over one hundred yards as the Greenies ground out the clock. Critics may say that Randy Moss doesn't try all the time but he always shows up in big games, scoring three huge touchdowns to put up a tremendous 24 points. The trade for Mr. Moss a few years ago has resulted in a premiere performer for Greg and launched him to both of his Super Bowl victories.

And you don't become a champion without making all the right moves. Heading into the weekend, Greg had Hines Ward lined up as he was looking to go run and shoot. After seeing Evan start out strong on Thursday night with Charles Johnson, Vince Young, and Nate Kaeding (who totaled 38 pts), he made the switch from Ward to running back sensation Jerome Harrison. Good move? How about 148 yards and a touchdown for Harrison, totaling 18 points, versus just five for Hines? That thirteen points made a difference, giving Greg breathing room for the eventual victory. Whew. Sidney Rice's 14 points on Monday night was just the cherry on top of a great weekend for Gang Green.

With possible rule changes in the near future, Greg's stunning victory and playoff run might be the capper to an incredible first cycle for CTDB. Clearly establishing himself as the team and GM of the decade, Greg can no longer be overlooked for accolades and cheers. So Greg, it's true, you're the best around!

Battle for the Best

2009-12-25T22:16:00.000-08:00

This is it, the biggest game of the season. And what a matchup we have lined up. Gang Green, winner of only five games in the regular season, are in the Super Bowl for the third time in their franchise's history. At their first appearance, in Super Bowl IV, they lost by one point. Then after a name change (from Green Team), they tied and became co-champs in Super Bowl VII. Will this be the year they capture a title outright? There's going to be a huge hurdle in their way though, as the Chunky Monkeys are heavily favored.

The Monkeys are also in the big game for the third time. They won in Super Bowl VI, lost last year in VIII, and will now face a huge underdog this weekend. In a season that featured quite a bit of league parity, the Monkeys were the highest scoring team, won the Inscrutable Drama Kings division (again) and seem to poised for a huge win that could secure their place in the CTDB pantheon. Only two teams have ever won two titles (Buffy and Dirty Birds) and one of these franchises win join that coveted club and actually leapfrog both Buffy and Dirty Birds as "Team of the Decade" because the Monkeys and Gang Green have the top two records in the league. Really, look it up. Through our first ten years together as a league, the Monkeys have a winning percentage of 66.4% (74-37-2) while Gang Green has the second best overall with a 56.3% (62-48-1)

Last week the Monkeys crushed the Dirty Birds, 119-97, in a matchup that was never very close. Behind Peyton Manning's 38 points and four TDs, along with Jamaal Charles' 23 points, the Monkeys cruised from the beginning. In the other divisional final, Gang Green snuck by defending champs Battle Angels by a narrow margin (86-78) as Drew Brees collapsed with only 14 points, and got outplayed by Matt Schaub, who had twenty two. That sets up this week's game, with the Greenies versus the Monkeys for bragging rights and potential Team of the Decade status. It does seem like Gang Green has the Chunky Monkey's number. While the Monkeys have winning records against every other franchise in the league, they've only managed to beat Greg's team three times (out of ten tries). That bodes well for the underdog. What doesn't bode well is Evan's talent edge and regular season track record. However, should Gang Green win, this would be an upset of Giants vs Pats 2008 proportions. Let's look at the matchups.

Quarterback: Shockingly, Evan is starting Vince Young instead of Peyton Manning. It's not surprising since Peyton will likely play very little as the Colts wrap up a dominant regular season, but it is kind of crazy that the leader of the Monkeys' franchise will be on the bench. In fact, what's actually crazy is that Vince wasn't even on the roster last week, as he was a waiver wire pickup just three days ago. Young has been on a tear recently, with games of 25, 23, and 29 in the last four weeks, so don't be surprised if he provides 90% of Peyton's value.

Greg will be playing Matt Schaub, who has been a top five QB this year, and only averages half a point less per week than Peyton. Despite Ben Roethlisberger's 44 points last week (in reserve), Greg wasn't tempted to go with Big Ben. Smooth move because Schaub is the leader of this team and is going up against a weak Dolphins' defense. It's hard to sit down a franchise player but Evan has done it, showing that he won't let emotion overcome his rationale. Due to this, we like his Vince move and think he'll make up well with Schaub. Edge: Even

Running Backs: We could make this a very short paragraph. In fact, we will. Last week Jamaal Charles and Charles Johnson combined for 37 points, and that's with Johnson "only" getting 160 yards rushing/receiving combined. Greg's backfield of Brandon Jacobs and Thomas Jones had ten points total. While the disparity won't likely be that large, it's clear that Evan's team is completely stacked at RB. So stacked that it looks like Greg will throw in a wrinkle of his own. Because his run game has been largely ineffective, he's going run and shoot, sitting down Brandon Jacobs. Might he regret that move, or even have made a mistake in having Jerome Harrison (last week's record setting Brown) sitting on his bench? Time will tell. Edge: Chunky Monkeys

Wide Receivers: It's a real toss up here because while Greg has big names, his four wides might struggle to all get on the same page. It's a good bet that either Vincent Jackson or Randy Moss will have a good game, but probably not both. Sidney Rice is going to put up double digits, but he's cooled off recently. Placing Hines Ward in for Brandon Jacbos will probably be a wash, but at least Ward will get a few points due to his receptions. We're thinking Gang Green's WRs will need to score three TDs between the four of them to have a great week.

On the other side of the ball, Evan's got Anquan Boldin coming off a nice showing last week, and Mike Sims-Walker has been an underrated receiver all year long. They should both catch touchdowns and combine for 25+ points. The question is if TE Jermichael Finely will replace any of Percy Harvin's production. It's interesting that Evan is going with such untested players (Vince and Finley, and Jamaal Charles to an extent), but that just shows his flexibility and willingness to gamble for gold. Edge: Gang Green

Defense and Kicker: While Shayne Graham and Giants Defense are both rated hot for Gang Green, there's not enough evidence here that either team has an edge for Def or K. The Monkeys have Nate Kaeding and the Cowboys and really, will either make the difference here? Probably not. Edge: Even

If I had told you that Peyton Manning, Matt Forte, and LaDainian Tomlinson would be sitting during championship week for the Monkeys, would you have believed me? Would you have said that the Monkeys were going to have a overwhelming talent edge and be an absolute juggernaut? Then again, if I had told you that a team led by Matt Schaub and um, Thomas Jones and Randy Moss, would upset their way to the Super Bowl, you wouldn't have believed it either right? So here we are, with pretty much a toss up for who will win. History tells us the Monkeys tend to collapse under pressure, while Gang Green capitalizes on their chances. History also tells us that a strong running game will lead to a championship, and the Monkeys clearly have the best RBs in this matchup. So here we go, Super Bowl X, and a chance to become the Best Franchise of the Decade!

SMG Playoffs - Rd 2

2009-12-16T08:39:00.000-08:00

Greg does it again! Despite being a big underdog, he upsets Jimmy's team, almost doubling the Fobsters' total (111 to 65) and cruises to round two of the playoffs. Despite having a 5-8 regular season record, Greg proves that on any given Sunday you have a chance. For Jimmy, it was a crushing loss as no player scored more than 13 points and his receivers totaled 15 points between the three of them. Greg's defense, the Titans, put up 21 points just by themselves. And that was only Greg's second highest player because Matt Schaub had a huge game of 29 (and Thomas Jones had 21 pts). Heck, Randy Moss even got a negative one for his day and Greg still whooped that ass. So, which Goliath is up next for our intrepid David? Well how about Vu's team, the defending champion Battle Angels who had the best record in the league, scored the most points during the regular season, and boasts the best player in the game, QB Drew Brees? Let's take a look at the matchup.

Quarterback: This isn't even a matchup. League MVP Drew Brees is averaging 28 points a game. He's had scores of 49-31-32 in his most recent three games. Matt Schaub has been nice recently but he's not Brees. Edge: Battle Angels

Running Back: Last week, we said that Green Team's Thomas Jones and Brandon Jacobs weren't good enough to win. Well, thirty one combined points later and they prove their worth. Jones' big game came at the perfect time but he'll have to do it again if Greg wants to have a chance this week. Facing off against the New York duo will be Vu's backfield of DeAngelo Williams and Cedric Benson. While DeAngelo was a superstar late last year, churning Vu's team to a championship, he's been good but not great this year. Despite being statistically a top ten back, he's not had a breakout week since WK10, which was a very long time ago. Benson was similarly much better at the beginning of the year too, and has been injured and not scored 20+ since WK7. Edge: Even

Wide Receiver: With plenty of big names, this is a high powered receiver matchup. Vu boasts Andre Johnson, who has quietly been the best WR in all the land this year, averaging 16 points a game. Behind him is Greg Jennings and Vernon Davis, who are big names and capable of big games. Davis has finally emerged as an offensive force and has been over double digits in four straight games and is now the premier TE in the game. Jennings has been erratic and there's even a chance that the other Steve Smith could replace him, but as a third receiver, he's deadly.

The thing is, Greg counters with an even more explosive trio. Vincent Jackson finally got back on track last week, and while Randy Moss suffered a terrible game, he could be huge any time he plays. Sidney Rice has been in double digits for five straight games and is catching a lot of balls even if he's lost some deep play potential to other receivers on the Vikings. Edge: Even

Defense and Kicker: When they say that defense doesn't matter, Greg points to his Titans, who absolutely dominated and threw up a huge game last weekend. Can they do it again? It's doubtful because they seem like a boom or bust proposition. They've had two other twenty point games this year but they've also had low single digits in most other weeks. Vu's Saints Defense has been much steadier, averaging almost twelve points a game, which is good for best fantasy defense of the year. Kickers Nick Folk (Green) and Garrett Hartley (Angels) are both average real life kickers but because Hartley is working in New Orleans, he's got much higher upside. It seems like riding the Saints is going to work out for Vu in more ways than just at quarterback. Edge: Battle Angels

Wow, I never would of thought that Greg and Vu would match up well. I mean, this is a league leader facing off against a team that barely squeaked into the playoffs. But Greg has proven that his team is nothing if not surprising and we predict a good fight. Still, the powers of Drew Brees will just be too much to overcome and he's going to take the Battle Angels back to the Super Bowl for a championship defense.

IDK Playoffs - Rd 2

2009-12-15T19:00:00.000-08:00

Win on the road and go to the Superbowl. That’s as simple as Dirty Birds running back, Adrian Peterson, wants to keep it. He knows the Monkeys are also looking to clinch their 2nd straight Superbowl appearance.

“It ain’t never easy. Our division, ain’t never easy. As coach tells us, we take it one game at a time but honestly, you guys know the history, we know these guys well. We’re divisional foes and we have a lot of game tape on these guys,” Peterson said Monday. “You just want to get to the Superbowl and this weekend will allow us to do that.”

If there was a division rival, its quickly turning into the Monkeys versus the Dirty Birds. These teams have faced off in the playoffs 4 out of the last 5 years (including this year and the last two conference championship games). Despite the Monkey’s vaunted offense throughout the years, the two teams have been pretty even when it counts. The Birds knocked off the Monkeys in the 2007 Conference Championship and the Monkeys re-paid the favor in 2008. On an all-time basis, the Monkeys have the second worst team record against the Birds (the Monkeys have an inexplicable losing record to Gang Green).

“Honestly, I expect to see them now. We’ve seen them the last couple of years and they have a good team. AP and S-Jax are as good as its gonna get in this league and everyone knows about their passing game. Wes Welker, Larry Fitz and Austin Miles …. Our DBs are going to have a heck of a game on their hands,” said Monkey’s captain, Ladainian Tomlinson, during this morning’s media session.

Here’s a look at this weekend’s match up:

Quarterback. Perhaps, the greatest weakness to this Dirty Bird lineup. With Carson Palmer suffering through an injury along with difficult matchups (Minnesota last week and San Diego this week), GM Jon Yang has scoured the waiver to pick up some fillers. Last week was David Garrard. Result? 8 points. bleh. This week, sources indicate that Yang will go with Jason Campbell. Campbell has been on a bit of a tear the last 3 weeks, averaging 28 points a week. The Monkeys have also had a similar issue. GM Evan Shiue signed Brett Favre and Vince Young a few weeks back knowing that a QB rotation will become necessary. While the Monkeys have yet to officially announce their starting QB, its likely they’ll stick with co-captain, Peyton Manning. Manning has been a star this year and the Monkeys expect no different this week. ADVANTAGE: MONKEYS

Running back. For the first time in a long long time, the Monkeys backfield is no longer the dominant stable backfield that the league has become used to. This year, GM Shiue has rotated between 4 different backs this year. The Monkeys have found a superstar in Chris Johnson but with Tomlinson tailing off (slightly) and Forte having a down year, the Monkeys have found themselves turning to first year back Jamaal Charles at times. We know that CJ will be in the lineup this week but the second back remains to be seen. Tomlinson has publicly lobbied for the start but there’s a good chance that we’ll see Charles in the backfield as well. As for the Birds, the issue is less with the matchup but more health. More specifically, Steven Jackson. S-Jax ran for a season-low 47 yards last week while dealing with a back injury. Assuming S-Jax is healthy, he and Adrian Peterson form the top tandem in the league. The two have combined for nearly 2,500 yards so far this year (through 14 weeks) – good for number 2 and 3 in the league. ADVANTAGE: BIRDS

Wide Receivers. If you add Larry Fitzgerald, Wes Welker, and Miles Austin you get … the best receiving core in the league. Hands down. The three have totaled for 248 catches, 3,150 yards and 24 touchdowns! Okay, so the Birds weren’t always this good … Austin literally came out of nowhere. But when healthy, there is no better receiving core. However, there’s a catch. There always is. Larry Fitz injured his knee last week. It didn’t look good but reports (from Larry’s tweets himself!) say that he’s “sore but ok”. Monkey coaches have publicly told the media that they are preparing as if Larry will play. We’ll see. On the flip side, the Monkeys have some uncertainty. The Monkeys receivers, strangely enough, have all scored roughly amount the same number of points (about 10 points per game) and are right next to each other in the rankings. Anquan Boldin is a certainty to start. With 68 catches, 800 yards and 4 touches … Quan leads the Monkeys in catches and yards this year. Rookie receiver, Percy Harvin, who’s been dealing with migraines will also start if healthy. Harvin has reeled in an impressive 48 catches and 680 yards to go with 6 TDs as a rookie this year. The third receiver slot is the mystery. The Monkeys have Sims-Walker and Kenny Britt on the roster but its unclear who will play. Sims-Walker has had a nice year but is dealing with injury. Britt has been hot but is a rookie. Word on the street is that the Monkeys have been active on the phones with potential free agent. We’ll know soon enough…. ADVANTAGE: BIRDS

Kicker. The Monkeys have Nate Kaeding. The best and most accurate kicker this year. We’re not sure who the Dirty Birds are playing. ADVANTAGE: MONKEYS

Defense. The Monkeys have yet to declare a defense while the Birds counter with the Packers. The Packers have been a top 3 defense this year. ADVANTAGE: Incomplete.

Wow. This one will be a tough one. “With all the star power on the field muddied by the injuries, this game will be a tough game to call.” Long time ESPN analyst Chris Mortensen opined in his weekly analysis. “The Monkeys are not only dealing with injuries with their receivers, I have no clue who they’ll start in the backfield with CJ. However, the Birds have similar issues. I’m not sure if Steven Jackson can play this week and certainly Larry Fitzgerald won’t be at 100%. My guess is that both will play but the Monkeys are deeper than people think. They’ve sort of flown under the radar this year as they’ve had one of their weaker regular seasons in their franchise history (8-5 entering the playoffs). However, this is a team that still won their division and can be very very dangerous. Don’t call me on it but I say Monkeys win by at least 10 here.”

A look back...
The Dirty Birds survived a terrible week. QB, David Garrard, scored 8 points with 139 passing yards and 26 rushing yards but no touchdowns. Steven Jackson barely mustered 5 points with 47 rushing yards. Larry Fitz played little over a half after sustaining a knee injury and finished with 3 points. Despite all of this the Birds mustered 84 points on the backs of AP (26 points with 97 rushing yards and 2 touches) and another clutch game by Miles Austin (71 receiving yards and a touch). Ante Up, who had been one of the hottest teams all year, laid an egg. MVP candidate, Aaron Rodgers (A-Rod), took himself out with a 0 touchdown, 1 fumble performance resulting in 9 points. Starters, Lesean McCoy, Robert Meachem, Reggie Wayne and Chad OchoCinco had a terrible day and combined for less than 30 points. If it weren’t for young Ray Rice’s 166 rushing and 53 receiving yards performance (to go with a long touchdown)...this team would’ve scored under 70 points. Dirty Birds got lucky...but sometimes its better to be lucky than good.

SMG Playoffs - Rd 1

2009-12-10T16:08:00.000-08:00

Fobsters (7-6) vs Gang Green (5-8)
We've seen this matchup before. In 2007, Gang Green and the Fobsters faced off, with Greg having the higher seed and squeaking by Jimmy in a tight matchup. This year, things look to be a bit different as they are definitely headed in opposite direcitons heading into the playoffs. The Fobsters are riding a three game win streak while Gang Green has lost four in a row. They only got into the playoffs because the Phreaks and Jubas are both on three losing streaks as well. Let's take a look at the matchups.

Quarterback
Normally Tom Brady versus Matt Schaub would be a no brainer but Brady hasn't been the steadiest of quarterbacks and Schaub is the seventh ranked QB this year. Looking into the stats however, Brady is superior and much steadier than Schaub, who is in a three week decline that has him scoring 27, 20, and 14 points recently. Maybe Greg will find another QB for this week but either way, Tom Terrific should be worth 20 points. Edge: Fobsters

Running Back
Brandon Jacobs and Thomas Jones, Greg's Big Apple combo hasn't been quite as effective as in years past. Jones is still a Top 10 back but he's topped twenty points only twice this season and has been averaging closer to 13 points the past six weeks. While Jacbos has underachieved all season, he's hot now after a a 23 point performance last week, but most of that was from a 70+ yard TD reception. I guarantee that's not happening again. Greg really missed Ronnie Brown, who was so hot to start the season.

Of course, it's not like the Fobsters have much of a ground game either. Does Laurence Maroney and Kevin Smith scare you? Maroney has actually been pretty good the past few weeks but turned up a dud last weekend (with four points). Smith has been erratic but occassionally breaks out and has accumulated enough points to be the thirteenth best RB this year. He seems to be trending up and will serve as the Fobsters driving force on the ground. Side note, how far has Reggie Bush fallen? He used to be a decent fantasy play but is almost useless nowadays. Sad. Edge: Fobsters

Wide Receiver
Speaking of falling off, how about that Calvin Johnson? Much like the sequel, this Transformer has been just terrible, barely ranking in the top 25 of wide receivers. He's been injured and unproductive but the good news is that he's had two huge weeks in the past four, so he could really help Jimmy out in the passing game. And Pierre Garcon, Jimmy's great FA pickup, has been scoring 12, 13, 14, 16 points in recent weeks, as he learns to connect with Peyton Manning. Even Jason Witten, with a down year, has had two 100+ yard games in a row and is peaking at just the right time. This all sounds great for the Fobsters right?

Not so fast. Greg's team is stacked at the receiver position. Deep threats Vincent Jackson and Randy Moss anchor the team and Randy is capable of exploding at any time (he's the second best WR this year, with four 20+ games). Jackson had four 20+ games up through WK 9 but none since. In fact, Jackson hasn't topped double digits since then so there's a little bit of concern. However, he's still capable of contributing at any time. It may not matter though because Jackson is really the number three receiver on this team, if you can believe it. FA pickup Sidney Rice has been a top ten WR this year and is exactly in the mold of Ross and Jackson, boom or bust deep threats. For example, the past four weeks have resulted in two 23 point games and 11 and 10. That's steady enough and we like Greg's chances for two of his guys to go big. Edge: Gang Green

Defense & Kicker
This is always an overlooked portion of matchups. Usually it's not a big deal as they should cancel each other out. But it boggles my mind that both GMs are going with defenses that are doing horrible the past three weeks. Sure the Ravens and Titans may sound like big names but neither of them have even put up five points in recent weeks. Greg's kicker, Nick Folk, has missed four field goals in four straight games and has scored 14 total over that span. Meanwhile, Jimmy's kicker has been the hottest in the game. David Akers has been in double digits most weeks and could provide a nice five or six point cushion over Folk's "work." Edge: Fobsters

Fearless Forecast
The good news for Greg is that he's actually outscored Jimmy this season (who has been the lowest scoring team in the league). The bad news is that Jimmy is heating up at the right time and has strung up games of 91-94-121 recently while Greg has been sub 80s, barring one 106 explosion -- which he lost. So I'm gonna go with the hot team here, Fobsters by fourteen.

IDK Playoffs - Rd 1

2009-12-09T01:12:00.000-08:00

At the time this article is going to press, while its not officially in the books, it does appear the first round playoff matchup is set. Boys and girls, set your tivo to the Dirty Birds and Ante Up as this one is going to be a doozy.

The focus, of course, will be on Ante Up as this was the team that finished with the worst record last year. The same team that had the first pick in this year’s draft. But oh what a draft it was. Outside of veteran receiver, Reggie Wayne, the entire starting lineup as of Week 13 comprised of new players. Wow.

Quarterback. With the first pick of the draft, Jae surprised teams a bit with a quick selection of Aaron Rodgers. That pick now looks genius. Rodgers is the second highest scoring player this year, ahead the likes of Peyton Manning, Tom Brady and Philip Rivers. With over 3,100 yards, 22 td passes and just 5 picks, Rodgers has had an MVP type of year. On the flip side, Jon counters with Carson Palmer and Matt Ryan. While Palmer has experienced somewhat of a renaissance year with Ochocinco back, both quarterbacks have been pedestrian at best. Ryan has had his moments but has been inconsistent with injury. With Ryan still injured, its likely we’ll see Palmer under the gun next week. Edge: Ante Up

Running Backs. Jon is stacked at the skill positions and the Dirty Bird backfield is no exception. Led by the incomparable Adrian Peterson and the multi-dimensional Steven Jackson, the 3rd and 5th best backs in the league respectively, the Dirty Bird backfield is set. On the other side of the field, Ante Up will counter with Most-Improved Player of the Year candidate, Ray Rice and young rookie back, LeSean (Shady) McCoy. Entering the year with Brian Westbrook and Steve Slaton as the starters, Ante Up has completely reworked his lineup. Rice is now a certain keeper and is the 4th highest scoring running back this year. McCoy has shown flashes of brilliance and certainly has extreme athleticism. Expect these two to be in the keeper roster entering next season. Edge: Dirty Birds

Wide Receivers. Reggie Wayne, alongside of Aaron Rodgers, is the unquestioned captain of this young Ante Up team. Wayne is flanked by new starters, Chad Ochocino (probably the best pick of this year’s draft) and newly acquired Robert Meachem. Don’t forget, some dude named TO was also recently signed off the waiver wire. If there’s a veteran component to this Ante Up lineup, there’s no question that it’s the receiving core. Wayne, Owens and Chad Johnson – rewind 3 years and you have a ridiculous receiving lineup. As stacked as Jon is in the backfield, his receiving core is quite possibly even more impressive. Led by the best receiver in the league (sorry Reggie Wayne), Larry Fitz – the Dirty Bird receiver core is complemented by the ridiculous Wes Welker and Miles Austin. For those that don’t know, that’s 3 of the top 6 receivers this year. While we all knew Larry and Wes were awesome, who the hell is Miles? Who cares … this is an uber athletic passing game. Get the damn ball! Edge: Dirty Birds

Fearless Forecast. Jae’s team has had a great year. Regardless of what happens here, Ante Up now has a solid fleet of keepers that will stabilize the roster for years. However, Jon’s roster is just too deep. There’s too much firepower and experience here. Dirty Birds by 15.

Final Standings 2009

2009-12-05T19:08:00.000-08:00

Monkeys Resign Favre

2009-12-03T16:49:00.000-08:00

With little fanfare, the Monkeys made a quiet move that reunited long-time teammates last week. On November 18th, Monkeys management met Brett Favre in a local diner in the Bay Area and signed him to a one year contract. Despite being unfamiliar with most of the players on the team today, Favre is no stranger to the Monkeys franchise. For those that remember, Brett Favre was an original draft choice of the Chunky Monkeys franchise in their original 2001 draft. As he will for the 2009 team, Favre served as a back-up to Peyton Manning in 2001. Along with Manning, co-captain LaDainian Tomlinson was also on the 2001 team where he was a fresh faced rookie from TCU.

Monkeys GM, Evan Shiue, told the media earlier “Its great to have Brett back. We actually even gave him his old locker back, next to Peyton’s. To be honest, we were surprised Brett was out there. He’s been having an MVP type of season. We all had dinner last week with LT and Peyton and it was nice to talk about the good ol’ days. I now Fred Taylor and Derrick Mason are still active in the league and all those guys are good friends. But most importantly, Brett will play a very important role in our lineup in the playoffs. Besides being the great clubhouse leader that he’s always been, we anticipate Brett to get significant snaps this season.”

ESPN’s Adam Shefter said “Great move by the Monkeys. The team will needed a back-up to Peyton Manning and you can’t get much better than Brett Favre. The Monkeys have been a little underrated this year with their ups and downs earlier this season and the show that the Angels have put on this year but this is a good good team. They have 4 starting quality backs which they rotate and 4 receivers that are very capable. This may be one of the most complete Monkeys team in recent history. The local word in town is that this team is as good, if not better, than the championship 2006 team. First round bye is a lock so lets see where we are in a few weeks.”

Monkeys 2009 Line-up

QB1: Peyton Manning
QB2: Brett Favre
RB1: LaDainian Tomlinson
RB2: Chris Johnson
RB3: Matt Forte
RB4: Jamaal Charles
WR1: Anquan Boldin
WR2: Percy Harvin
WR3: Mike Sims-Walker
WR4: Jerricho Cotchery
K: Nate Kaeding
D: San Diego

Playoffs Preview

2009-12-02T20:46:00.000-08:00

With only one team mathematically eliminated, this is shaping up to be one of the best final regular season weekends in CTDB history. With 3 playoff spots at stake (the top seeds are in), the battles this week will be fierce. Here’s a look at each team and their chances.

SMG Division

• Battle Angels. 1st seed, 1st round bye. Vu has put together another stunning season with not only the best record in his division (only winning team actually), it’s the best record in the whole league.

• Fobsters. Fobsters are in! If Jimmy’s team wins, he locks up the second seed. If he loses, a Gang Green win will likely give Greg the second seed through the points scored tie breaker. However, in the worst case scenario, the Fobsters own the tiebreaker over the Phreaks with a 2-0 heads up record for the final playoff slot.

• Gang Green. A win will likely secure Greg another playoff spot; coupled with a Fobster loss, the Green team could actually sneak into the second slot. With a split with the Phreaks this year, Greg did have a fantastic scoring year which gives him a solid chance in case of a win by the Phreaks. However, a loss coupled with either a Phreaks OR Jubas win means Gang Green would fall out of playoff contention. This would be a stunning collapse with a 3 game losing streak already in place. Broncos anyone?

• Phreaks. Despite a very up and down year, Ping’s team has a shot this year. But they need to win. They also need some help! However, the Phreaks are playing the worst team in the league this week which gives them a shot. The big matchup that all the Phreaks will be following will be the Dirty Birds v Gang Green matchup. A Dirty Birds win means the playoffs for the Phreaks – assuming they take care of business against the Jammers.

• Fat Jubas. Alive. But barely. On the bubble, but burstin’ is around the corner. The Jubas need to win (duh) but they also need the Phreaks AND Gang Green to lose next week. No easy task but weirder things of happened.

IDK Division

• Chunky Monkeys. Like the Angels, its over here. The Monkeys have the first slot locked up. Monkeys are already looking forward to their first week playoff bye. Whapow!

• Dirty Birds. A win secures the Birds the second slot. However, a loss makes things tricky. A win by either Ante Up or Buffy will result in a 3rd place seeding. HOWEVER, if both teams win, the Birds could be on the outside looking in. Similar to the Jubas, a lot of things would need to go wrong but you never know.

• Ante Up. This is where things get tricky with Ante Up entering the final week in a dead heat tie with Buffy. The cleanest way for the Ante Up to get in is to just win. Ante Up, with a regular season split with Buffy, owns a commanding league in the points scored tie breaker. A loss with a Buffy win means Ante Up is out.

• Buffy. See above. Buffy definitely needs to win. On the wrong end of the tie breaker, Buffy needs to win against the Angels (no easy task). They also need Ante Up to lose. If both the Birds and Ante Up lose, the Buffy could actually rise to the second seed. However, GM Roger just wants in. Talk about a big game!

• Tiiite End Jammers. The only team mathematically eliminated. A tough season for the Jammers but they’ll be back next year.

Ice Ice Baby

2009-11-12T03:28:00.000-08:00

With four more regular season games to go, the Dirty Birds are making a drive to keep their playoff hopes alive. Coming off a huge win against division rival Buffy, the Birds have righted the ship at 4-4-1 but have been under fire for poor coaching. Their roster boasts runnings backs Adrian Peterson and Steven Jackson, along with Larry Fitzgerald and Wes Welker. That's four top fifteen players, with Peterson and Fitzgerald top five producers. In addition, young receiver Miles Austin has been having a hell of a season but hasn't gotten off the bench for any of his monster games. Instead he's only contributed 25 points to the Birds' bottom line. The player that was starting in front of him? Braylon Edwards, who has been pretty awful until very recently. And what about the quarterback position? Sophomore QB Matt Ryan has been in a slump (15 and 10 pts in his last two outtings) but has never left the starting lineup despite having Carson Palmer behind him, who has been on fire since Week 2. Bad coaching or just brand loyalty? You decide.

GM Jon told the media today that he expects to win the rest of his games and advance to the top seed in the division, or at least to the second seed. With a tough schedule coming up against the other division, including the last two defending champions, the Birds are in for a make it or break it month.

Early Season Review: Part 2

2009-10-08T20:56:00.000-07:00

Gang Green (3-1)
Led by a surprising Joe Flacco who has been a top 10 QB this year so far, Gang Green has found itself a top a surging Spunky Misunderstood Geniuses division. Ronnie Brown has been the rock of the team with 4 TDs this year. While Brandon Jacobs has been up and down, the real strength of the Gang Green is in the WR core. VJax is a legitimate starter this year while veterans Randy Moss and Hines Ward have been steady (not yet spectactular). We expect Moss to heat up as Brady gets up to speed which represents only upside for Gang Green. We may be looking at the run away leader this year for the SMG division.

Battle Angels (2-1-1)
The defending champion could easily be tied for first if it weren't for a strange tie last week. Drew Brees had a ridiculous start to the season then threw two straight clunkers Brees will turn it around and the Angels sure hope he does as Brees is the cornerstone in their high powered offense. Pierre Thomas and DeAngelo Williams are the starters in a solid backfield while Andre Johnson, Greg Jennings, and Steve Smith headline one of the deepest receiving core in all of CTDB. While AJ has been a beast, Steve Smith and Jennings have been up and down. There will more ups than downs in the weeks to come so we another strong season for the Angels.

Fobsters (2-2)
Fobsters is in third place!! Tom Brady is back! Thats about it really. But its better than nothing - for a team that finished with no wins a few seasons back. The rest of Jimmy's team is unspectacular at best. Reggie Bush is a bust given his draft position and hype that he came with. Kevin Smith has quietly been a top 10 back this year. Despite all-world talent, Megatron has been just above-average. Santana Moss and Witten have been serviceable which just about where Fobsters expect them to be. All that put together - what do you get? A potential fringe playoff team particularly if Brady continues to improve. The Fobsters will likely face stiff competition from the slumping Fat Jubas though as the weeks progress.

Fat Jubas (1-2-1)
The Fat Jubas are known for their slow starts despite one of the best looking rosters this year. Kurt Warner is probably at the end of his career but with Larry Fitzgerald, Anquan Boldin and Steve Breaston, its hard not to put up numbers. The Jubas, like the Monkeys, are very deep in their backfield with Frank Gore, Michael Turner, Ryan Grant along with Glenn Coffee and lightning bug, Darren Sproles. Even with an injury to Gore, the Jubas are still able to field a competitive backfield for the next few weeks. As for the receivers, the Jubas are led by resurgent Marques Colston and Brandon Marshall. Dallas Clark and Tony Gonzalez also often see the field. The Jubas are one of the few teams in CTDB history to start two TEs. Go figure...

Philadelphia Phreaks (1-3)
Probably the unluckiest team in CTDB history, the Phreaks have scored 383 points, good for 5th in the league. However, on the flip side, opponents have scored 469 points off the Phreaks. Thats nearly 120 points per game per week. Safe to say, the Phreaks defense has some holes to plug in. Donny McNabb has been hurt again but looks to return this week against the Bucs. Perhaps, the tide is turning and Phreaks can get on track for a winning season. On the plus side of things, McNabb's replacement, the venerable Brett Favre has been tearing it up. And Maurice-Jones Drew has been justifying his early draft status too. If the schedule (and injuries) would let up, the Phreaks do have some talent.

Early Season Review: Part 1

2009-10-07T05:09:00.000-07:00

The Inscrutable Drama Kings have always been the undisputed "better" division until recently. With the Battle Angels dominant run last year, the tables may have turned. Three of the Drama Kings have the lowest scoring teams in the league -- and by a wide margin. While the Drama Kings do boast the two highest scoring teams, the rest of the division is looking a bit weak. Still, there's a lot of football left to be played isn't there?

Chunky Monkeys (3-1)
After one week with a losing record, the Monkeys have righted the ship and ripped off three straight wins to find themselves at a familiar position, at the top of the standings. There's a changing of the guard however as the team is in clear transition. QB Peyton Manning has stepped up and been better than ever (or just as good as normal) with nine TDs to only three INTs so far. The big change is the fact that LaDainian Tomlinson is reaching the end of his stardom. He's been hurt and has posted only nine points through the first four weeks. New franchise back Chris Johnson had a huge game in WK2 but has been only middling otherwise. WR Anquan Boldin has been quieter than normal but Evan's selection of Percy Harvin (24 pts) and Jerricho Cotchery (51 pts) has picked up the slack -- especially with Anthony Gonzalez still injured. The big question is what is happening to Matt Forte? Is he a franchise back? Or will it be Fred Jackson who turns out to be the better performer? Either way, the Monkeys have depth and Peyton and that has proven to be plenty.

Ante Up (2-2)
Here's something, Jae looks to be making the push into playoff status early. Behind first round pick QB Aaron Rodgers, Ante Up has been putting up the points with a balanced attack led by Reggie Wayne (68 pts), the remergence of Chad Ochocinco (49 pts), and dual threat running back Steve Slaton. There's still some holes on this team though. Brian Westbrook has been dinged up early and his backup LeSean McCoy hasn't really stepped up. Also, there's no third receiver on this team as Devin Hester and Antonio Bryant have been clear disappointments. Still, the season is young and Ante Up has a statement to make this year.

Buffy (2-2)
This is going to sound redundant but here's another team being carried by their quarterback. Philip Rivers has been hot hot hot and he's bringing TE Antonio Gates along for the ride. The problem is that big names Roddy White, TJ Houshmandzadeh, and Donald Driver haven't been performing (Buffy stalwart Torry Holt was finally, unceremoniously, released). Roger's team needs to get his receivers up to speed and then hope that RB Marion Barber gets healthy quick. Without him, the team has been relying on Willis McGahee, Julius Jones, and Ahmad Bradshaw to run the ball. Those three have only combined for 46 points total.

Dirty Birds (2-2)
After starting off with two wins, the Birds have crashed back to Earth and are sliding back to the pack. All world Adrian Peterson has been bottled up except for WK1 and has been increasingly average. QB Matt Ryan was looking terrific until being shut down by the Patriots but he should continue to be a franchise player. What is really hurting the Birds is their receivers. Larry Fitzgerald has been decent but Braylon Edwards, Wes Welker (injured), and whoever Jon has nabbed off the waiver wire have been pretty terrible. With Steven Jackson racking up the yards but not the TDs, the Birds need some WRs to step up to get out of their slump.

Tiiite End Jammers (1-3)
Despite losing three straight, the Jammers actually look okay on paper. QB Tony Romo has been effective, the "other" Steve Smith has made a name for himself, Joseph Addai and Santonio Holmes have both been serviceable, and the rest of the team have had their moments. The problem though is that they don't have any explosiveness. Aside from a 130 point outburst in WK1, they've only topped 80 points once. That and they've had a rough schedule, soaking up back to back poundings from division leaders Chunky Monkeys and Ante Up in WK2-3. The Jammers have some things to look forward to as big names Clinton Portis, Dwayne Bowe, and Roy Williams have underperformed a bit and can only improve.

Get Your Phreak On

2009-08-26T16:18:00.000-07:00

Our favorite world traveler is finally back in the Bay and rumors have it that his new pad is decked out with multiple televisions and the NFL Sunday package. We'll send in a league spy to check the place out, on Sundays of course. The Philadelphia Phreaks have had quite the roller coaster history with CTDB. A few ups, a few downs -- a lot of downs -- but always a consistent voice and writer of awesome articles. Let's take a look shall we?

Historical Record
It hasn't been easy for the Phreaks. Just two winning records in nine years, a pair of 2-11 seasons, injuries, injuries, and more injuries. In fact, the injury bug that hits this team has often been so bad that our league has the "Phreak Curse," which is like Murphy's Law that demands "Anything that can go wrong, will go wrong." Despite all this, the Phreaks have been to the playoffs four times and almost made the Super Bowl on two separate occasions (2002 and 2006). Through it all, the Phreaks have always been gritty, active, and full of fight.

In general, Ping's teams have generally been middle of the pack, with some epic tailspins -- eleven losses in a row in 2003 -- but also with some accompanying fireworks too. For example, in 2004, they set a then record for most points scored in a game. One year prior, they set the record for highest individual fantasy performance, 57 points by RB Clinton Portis. Most years, the Phreaks will have a few weeks of absolute blazing performances followed by an injury (or two) and then a disappointing end to the season. The only year that the Phreaks ended the regular season on an upswing was 2004, when they won three in a row but finished short of the playoffs.

Is this franchise snake bitten? Hard to say. Karma demands that what comes around goes around but the loyal Phreaks fan base have been waiting for almost a decade and they're eager for a championship. Luckily, through a fantastic 2009 draft and another well assembled running game, GM Ping is looking to give them just that this year. Let's toast to the Phreaks future success and for the many awesome articles to come from this venerable franchise.

Core Roster
No team is more aptly named than the Philadelphia Phreaks. With the name "Philadelphia" in the name, the Phreaks have declared their allegiance to the City of Brotherly Love and have had Eagles players littering the roster every year. Generally speaking, this isn't a great idea, to have every player from one franchise. In terms of the Eagles, it tends to mirror their up and down seasons. I mean, QB Donovan McNabb is one of the finest fantasy QBs in recent memory but he's also hurt quite a bit.

The true stalwarts on this roster have been Eagles Defense and David Akers. Both of these slots are always steady. The Eagles field good defenses and always have good kicking production. GM Ping often gets enamored with any young Eagles receiver and that hasn't panned out like ever. Remember Freddie Mitchell? Where's James Thrash? Donte Stallworth was okay. Kevin Curtis had two nice games. Hank Baskett is less famous than his fiance right now. In fact, the Eagles down the field passing game has always been a work in progress, and same with the Phreaks. Despite many familiar names that have come through over the years (Isaac Bruce, Keyshawn Johnson, Plaxico Burress, Santana Moss, Javon Walker, Jerry Porter, Chris Chambers, Roy Williams), the only franchise worthy WR this team has produced is TJ Houshmanzadeh, whose best years are already behind him as he was just released. The supplemental pickup of Terrell Owens this year keeps with the trend of taking veteran receivers who might be slightly past their prime.

But while the receiving corps have been mostly undistinguished, the Phreaks have been fantastic on the ground. In their inaugural season, they had Emmitt Smith and Stephen Davis past their primes but still very effective. In 2002, they hit the jackpot by drafting Jamal Lewis and trading for Clinton Portis. With these two as franchise cornerstones, the Phreaks could churn out the yards. And often did, until one or the other got hurt. Or went to jail. After those two, there was a series of swing for the fences young RB picks like Kevin Jones, Julius Jones, DeShaun Foster, and Tatum Bell before finding that little wrecking ball, Maurice Jones-Drew in 2006 and promising workhorse Marshawn Lynch in 2007. That was followed up by the selection of Darren McFadden last year and so the table is set for the Phreaks to run wild again.

The formula for the Phreaks has never changed. Have a grinding ground game, draft some Eagles receivers (this year it's DeSean Jackson), and put it all on Donovan's arm -- and health. While this hasn't always produced consistent results, it has given the Phreak fans something to cheer about and nobody has more loyalty and hope than those fans in Philly.

Season Breakdowns
2008: 6-7; Finished in fourth place despite a strong start at 4-3.
2007: 2-11; Lost seven in a row and finished with the worst record in the league.
2006: 7-6; Started out 6-1 and went to the playoffs but updended by the Fat Jubas. Donovan McNabb and Clinton Portis both went down.
2005: 5-8; Despite a losing record, made the playoffs and put up quite the fight versus eventual champ Flaming Shrapnel (lost by 4) in the first round.
2004: 6-7; Started off 3-1, lost six in a row, and then won last three games to barely miss the playoffs.
2003: 2-11; Held water at 1-1 until losing eleven games in a row. Ouch.
2002: 7-6; A series of trades dramatically reshaped the roster and the Phreaks were rolling until McNabb went down in November.
2001: 5-7; Originally named TAGHeuer, they made the first round of the playoffs despite a losing record and were promptly bounced.

Stats
Highest Avg Game Score, Season: 111.43 (2002)
Most Points Scored, Game: 174 (2004)
Least Points Scored, Game: 38 (2006)
Best Margin of Victory, Game: 114 (2004)
Worst Margin of Defeat, Game: -77 (2001)
Longest Winning Streak, Season: 5 (2006)
Longest Losing Streak, Season: 11 (2003)

Grading the 2009 Draft

2009-08-26T02:17:00.000-07:00

It's a brand new season and a full fledged changing of the guard is around the corner. For the first time in a long time, LaDainian Tomlinson isn't the undisputed best back in fantasy. In fact, it can be said that he's no longer even in the top five. A slew of sophomores and third year players are poised to take over the league and that means some old time keepers are starting to outlive their star status. For Buffy, releasing franchise cornerstone WR Torry Holt marked a clear break from the past. Other stars like RB Brian Westbrook, Chad Ochocinco, Marvin Harrison, Donald Driver, and Terrell Owens are clearly on the downside of their careers. CTDB is headed for change and the next few years could result in a drastic change in power. So how did the draft go this year? Well, surprisingly light on rookies and young players, and maybe one last fling with the old guard.

1. Ante Up
After having another down season, Ante Up finally get the first overall pick. Last year they selected second and had a stellar draft, bringing in the backfield of the future in RBs Steve Slaton and Jonathan Stewart. Brian Westbrook and Reggie Wayne have some more time left but it's questionable whether WR Antonio Bryant was a better keeper than Colts up and coming receiver Anthony Gonzalez (of course, two Colts' WRs might be one too many). With his first pick, Jae solidified his quarterback position with Aaron Rodgers, who was explosive and has a lot of promise. If he can stay healthy, he's a franchise QB in the making. Two more promising RBs were selected this year, Ray Rice and LeSean McCoy. The writing is on the wall for Brian Westbrook as Jae has wisely selected his backup. With Chad Ochocino (Rd2) and Devin Hester (Rd4) also on board, Ante Up should have a good season, especially with a strong defense also on board in the Vikings D.
Grade: B+

2. Buffy
Buffy fell to 4-9 last year but he's hoping to be on the upswing. After selecting WR Roddy White last year in the draft and netting TE Antonio Gates, the passing game is in good hands, especially with QB Philip Rivers calling the shots. In fact, Buffy may be looking to pass a lot this year because he took three more WRs with his first picks. TJ Houshmanzadeh is on a new team and possibly a steal in the supplemental draft, Lance Moore is promising and productive, and old stalwart Torry Holt has been brought back for sentimental reasons. However, the selection of K Stephen Gostkowski in Rd4 is a bit curious as the backfield is thin, with RBs Marion Barber and Willie Parker both looking at possible time shares. Can young runners Ahmad Bradshaw and Jamaal Charles pick up the slack if one of the starters goes down? We'll roll the dice with GM Roger's draft strategy and put faith in his selection of a K before backup running backs.
Grade: B-

3. Fobsters
The Fobsters are no strangers to high picks in the draft. Save one glorious season, they've had a top three pick three times in the past four years. Last year's weak draft directly contributed to their losing season. Needing receivers, they traded Chad Ochocinco for Larry Johnson (a wash) and drafted Jerricho Cotchery, Jason Witten, and Patrick Clayton. In hindsight, only Witten was worth the roster spot -- he's now a keeper. Let's hope this year's first few selections fare better. Prognositcators are in love with Detroit RB Kevin Smith and he's sorely needed as Larry Johnson and Reggie Bush aren't stars (anymore and never was, respectively). Eddie Royal, Santana Moss, and Chris Chambers should complement the passing game well and we love the promise of rookie RB Shonn Green. Throwing in the rottweiler Giants D is nice too. With Megatron Calvin Johnson on board and QB Tom Brady returning, look for the Fobsters to return to contention... for a winning record.
Grade: B+

4. Philadelphia Phreaks
Despite a luxurious ocean cruise to Mexico and back, GM Ping put their game face on and will fight to get to a .500 record this year. They selected RB Darren McFadden first overall last year and that pick has yet to pay a lot of dividends. For now, he'll share the backfield with fellow keepers Maurice Jones-Drew and Marshawn Lynch. That's a pretty solid running game, the problem is, the passing for the Phreaks was soft heading into the draft. QB Donovan McNabb is still mighty fine but DeSean Jackson isn't a number one receiver. The one year rental of Terrell Owens will help a lot here, and Bernard Berrian's stock just went sky high after Brett Favre became a Viking. Round four WR Kevin Walters almost had 1000 yards with his 8 TDs last year. Post-draft, that's a good starting quartet. Eagles rookie Jeremy Maclin has some speed but he was picked by Ping to increase the Philly presence. We really like Ping's selection of rookie RB Donald Brown, who will join a crowded backfield.
Grade: A-

5. Tiiite End Jammers
The Jammers snuck into the playoffs with a losing record last year and might be headed lower thsi season. The off-season was not kind to them. QB Tony Romo lost Terrell Owens while WR Lee Evans added a competitor. Clinton Portis is another year older (slower) and Joseph Addai will be challenged by rookie Donald Brown. Hey, at least Dwayne Bowe won't have to share the ball with Tony Gonzalez anymore! Lei saw his needs and went for WRs with upside -- just like he did last year when he took Bowe, Evans, Chambers, Justin Gage and Ted Ginn. This year's selections of Roy Williams, Santonio Holmes, and Domenik Hixon all have a chance to be the number one receivers on their respective teams. We'd put Donnie Avery on that list too but he's out 4-6 weeks to start the season. Other than that, rookies RB Chris "Beanie" Wells and WR Michael Crabtree have potential but not a lot of immediate success slated for them. We don't know where the Jammers are headed this season, but we're not high on their chances for dramatic improvement.
Grade: C+

6. Dirty Birds
With a solid keeper core, the Birds don't have many holes. RBs Adrian Peterson and Steven Jackson are franchise talents, and WR Larry Fitzgerald is the best in the game. The jury is out on Braylon "Brick Hands" Edwards but there's hope he'll return to form. At least Wes Welker is still the game's most dependable slot receiver. The problem for the Birds is that Peterson and Jackson are injury prone. Thus, rookie RB Knoshown Moreno was selected in the first round. And promptly got injured in pre-season. He belongs on this team already. Sophmore sensation QB Matt Ryan was selected to appease the fan base and to pilot the Birds into the future. Old time veterans like WR Laveranues Coles, RB LenDale White, and QB Carson Palmer provide decent if totally unexciting backups.
Grade: C+

7. Fat Jubas
The Jubas must really like Packer's RB Ryan Grant. He was a keeper last year and draft quickly this year. How much upside can Grant have? Along with the return of Grant, TE Tony Gonzalez was quickly scooped up again to round out the receiving trio along with Marques Colston and Brandon Marshall. But this team is a running team, with Michael Turner and Frank Gore leading the way. That's a really great running game isn't it? Behind them, Eric took another Chargers' backup, Darren Sproles. TE Dallas Clark and "I don't know who he is" WR Brian Robiskie probably won't get on the field much, unless one of the starters get injured. With his last pick, Eric took Redskins' WR Devin Thomas, who won last year's Rookie Madden Bowl. With four running backs and two star receivers, the Jubas are stacked. But wait, what happens if QB Kurt Warner goes down? The backup is. The backup is. Wait for it, nobody. Perhaps the Jubas will just surf the waiver wire, or pray for Warner to make another miracle season, or just pick up Matt Leinart. He's gotta be available right?
Grade: C

8. Gang Green
We just did a franchise review on Gang Green and talked about their lack of superstars. Winning consistently always gives them a low pick at the draft and this year is no exception. Draft picks Vincent Jackson, Ted Ginn Jr., and Felix Jones aren't likely to transform into top five talents anytime soon. However, Gang Green is already solid at every position with the three headed RB attack of Brandon Jacobs, Thomas Jones, and Ronnie Brown. Old school WRs Randy Moss and Hines Ward complement each other well but Greg will have to work quickly on the wire to pick up some future talent. QBs Jay Cutler and Matt Schaub will both be more than serviceable and that makes the selection of the number one defense on the board, Steelers D, in RD3, very defensible. The Greenies didn't draft any future stars but hey, they apparently don't need'em!
Grade: B

9. Chunky Monkeys
Every year it's the same old story. Low draft pick and an abudance of running back talent. Evan specializes in digging up dynamite young RBs and last year he hit the jackpot with Matt Forte and Chris Johson -- both of whom are now keepers. This backfield of the future comes at just the right time as longtime franchise cornerstone LaDainian Tomlinson is on his way out (but maybe not without another huge season). QB Peyton Manning is still consistent as rain but he'll be throwing to some new faces this year. Franchise WR Anquan Boldin is disgrutled but mighty fine. Terrell Owens and Chad Ochostinko are gone. First round pick Anthony Gonzalez was a great move and if Jerricho Cotchery, Percy Harvin, or Josh Morgan can do something/anything, the Monkeys will be delighted. Then again, they've always had a hole at the third WR position, and it really hasn't made much of a difference in their winning ways has it?
Grade: B

10. Battle Angels
The Angels had a dream season. After going 5-8 two seasons ago, they turned it all around, added four wins to the bottom line, won their division, and also took home the championship trophy for the cherry on top. And we kind of love their game. With reigning MVP Drew Brees flinging the ball all over the place to three bonafide number one receivers (Andre Johnson, Steve Smith, Greg Jennings), not many teams can keep up with their firepower. RB DeAngelo Williams was a revelation for the playoff run and could still keep churning this year despite competition from Jonathan Stewart. Vu smartly drafted a bunch of starting tailbacks should Williams falter however. We love his picks of Pierre Thomas, Derrick Ward, and Cedric Benson, who aren't big names but have more than serviceable games. Picking up Steve Breaston, the other Steve Smith and Chris Henry also gives them the ability to go run-and-shoot just like last year. We like the Angels to put up a stiff title defense and we can't see much drop off.
Grade: A-